DOA. Part 18

Billy wakes up to the sunlight creeping in through the curtains. Waking up, still tired, he nearly gags. The entire house has a stench of beer.

Ultimate Guitar

Billy wakes up to the sunlight creeping in through the curtains. Waking up, still tired, he nearly gags. The entire house has a stench of beer. He heads downstairs, to find Liam and Rita already starting to clean up the house. They've already cleaned up the mess near the stairs, and he walks over to the kitchen where Liam and Rita are.

So what was with the guy last night? Billy asks as he approaches them.

He's my ex-boyfriend, if that explains anything. Rita replies.

Why did he have a gun? Liam asks.

I don't really know, She says as she sits down, He was trying to get me back, or get back at me or something, I don't really know.

Liam and Billy look to each other, and decide not to ask any more questions.

Oh, Billy! Liam says, somewhat excited. We still have to call that number on the card that we got.

Alright. Billy says as Liam grabs the phone, and dials the number on the card. It rings a few times, and then goes to the answer machine.

Hello, if you're an asshole from the shit band called Frozen With Fear, please leave an angry rant after the beep, and we'll tell you to f--k off. Assholes.

Well, they're nice. Billy states simply. Maybe we should call Roy, and find out the story behind this? After all, he's the connection between our band and Frozen With Fear.

That sounds like a good idea. Liam says as he hangs up the phone, and dials Roy's number.

Hello? Hey Liam, what's up? Roy says as he answers the phone.

Hey Roy, did Frozen With Fear ever piss any band off, like a lot?

Yeah, we had a feud going on with that shit punk band, The Rabies. Roy says, as he starts to explain.


It was May of 2007, our first show. We had been practicing for months, and had managed to avoid the opening spot. We were second on the bill, before us was The Rabies, they were supposed to be the opening act.

When we got there, we had been told that The Rabies had refused to open the show, even though it was their first show as well. We were asked to open it instead, and since we didn't really care when we played, as long as we got to play, we agreed.

Will, however, was pissed. We were offered a better playing time, and were forced to open, at least that's how he saw it.

So, when we were done with our set, we headed out to the parking lot. Robby and Will both wanted to have a smoke. So we're standing around there, and Will starts talking about how The Rabies are assholes and such. He had the great idea to slash their tires, just to f--k with them.

That really backfired.

After they were done with their set, we were still standing around in the parking lot near our van. They came out with their stuff, load into their van, and then they noticed that their tires have been slashed.

They came over to us and started talking shit, accusing us of it. Will stepped to the front of our group, got up in their faces, and was insulting them. After a few minutes of exchanging insults, he threw the first punch.

Their idiot guitarist was the one closest to him, and got pretty beat up before anyone else had a chance to do anything. We ended up pulling him off of the dude, who was then laying on the ground, beaten and bruised, mostly from the rings on Will's fingers.

Two of the other three started throwing punches at us. The third, picked up a tire iron out of the back of their van. That's when things got ugly.

He started swinging it at us, hit Will in the stomach, but Will kinda deserved it anyways. He swung it at me, but I ducked and it hit the back window of our van, sent glass flying everywhere. He then slammed it through the other window, and started smashing up our van.

Ben and Robby had managed to wrestle the other two to the ground, and Will was already down.

Ken, our rhythm guitarist, and I were left standing. I grabbed the tire iron out of the guys hands, and Ken, who is probably the biggest of all of us, threw a punch at his face. He instantly went down cold.

The bar manager came out and started swearing at us. He told us to take our money and get the f--k out of his parking lot, or he was going to call the cops.

The next show we played, in late June of the same year, was with them as well. We were offered the second highest place on the bill, and they were still opening. During our set, they were at the front, booing and swearing at us. During one of my solos, Will jumped down into the mosh pit and started fighting with them. We stopped playing, and tried to pull him out, but got sucked into the fight.

The owner of the bar came out with a shot gun, and fired it over our heads, and everyone stopped. However, he had been enjoying our set, so he kicked them out, and let us continue playing. He actually gave us their cut of the door as well.

But as they were leaving, they swore that they would get us back, and that there was no way that they would let us have the last laugh.

And the end of our finale, there was a huge explosion from outside. It would have given us a great effect for a live recording, but regardless, it left us without a van.

We had to find other rides home, and eventually did, at three in the morning.


Ever since then, we've been enemies, and we're always booking shows nearby theirs at the same time and everything. Or, on the rare occasion that we play with them, we get into fights with them. Roy says as the rest of the band listens.

We had told Roy to come over shortly after he started to explain, as well as getting Dan and Alan over to the house. We had explained everything, and now, so had Roy.

So, since you guys broke up, they're just f--king with any bands from this area? Dan asks curiously.

It seems like it. Roy replies simply. I think we ought to f--k them over bad enough to get them to stop. I heard they stole a guitar from Nonetheless yesterday, too. Oh, and they had a show last night, nearby, that was actually a release show. Apparently they recorded a full CD of shit.

I heard they were going on tour to support that CD, too. Liam contributes to the conversation.

Well what does this have anything to do with us, really? Alan asks, somewhat confused, Are they that big of assholes, that they're f--king with us, just because Roy is in our band now?

Yeah, that's basically it. Billy answers. Maybe we could plan shows at the same time, for an entire tour, to completely outdo them.

That's... actually a pretty good idea. Roy says as he thinks. But we don't have a name, or anything recorded, or any merchandise.

How about Dead On Arrival? Alan suggests. Think about it; it IS our best song, and it wouldn't be a bad name, at least that's what I think.

I don't know... Dead On Arrival seems too... emo. Roy says. Maybe just DOA, instead?

That actually sounds like a great idea. Liam says.

Billy, Alan, and Dan all agree. DOA it is, then. Roy states proudly.

7 comments sorted by best / new / date

    good post although it was a little short it will be interesting to see where you go with this
    GSD N3
    They're always short. It's designed to have short installments of it. Wouldn't really work the way I want them to if I made them longer. "Those punk are pretty metal"
    GSD N3 : They're always short. It's designed to have short installments of it. Wouldn't really work the way I want them to if I made them longer. "Those punk are pretty metal"
    I think he means that it's awesome that they're getting into weapon fights and such about their gigs, not to mention blowing up the van. That's pretty metal.
    GSD N3
    Punks like to destroy things and f*** sh*t up, too. Just as much, if not more. I'd know. haha. Metal or punk, it's still destruction.