Led Zeppelin Coincidences

A laidback yet silly tale of love told through all song titles of Led Zeppelin.

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Poor Tom sat on his porch reading Moby Dick eating a Tangerine with some Custard Pie as his Living Loving Maid (She is however, Just a Woman) Rambled On how Tom had put ketchup all over her Kashmir dress left over from his Hot Dog. "Since I've Been Loving You," she said In The Light of their porch, "Those Ten Years Gone can't bring back All My Love." Dazed and Confused, Tom tried to understand this Communication Breakdown.

"Hey, Hey What Can I Do? Nobody's Fault but Mine, I suppose," he said, reflecting upon the Good Times, Bad Times. "But I Can't Quit You Baby. I've got a Whole Lotta Love for you, not even The Ocean could contain How Many More Times I'd love you."

"What about that puddle Down by The Seaside? The Song Remains the Same with you," Darlene said. "Living alone with you up on this Black Mountain Side, I sometimes think of Going To California, Over the Hills and Far Away"

"But you're a Black Country Woman!" Tom argued "Don't go and be a Heartbreaker, my love for you reaches the Ozone, Baby. I'd stop The Battle of Evermore In My Time of Dying For Your Life!"

"Look at my dress!" Darlene pointed Out on the Tiles. "My clothes are Wearing and Tearing! The D'yer Mak'er brand doesn't even take the stains out! I'm Sick Again of you treating me like some Black Dog, like The Rover our Friends have down in Bron Yr-Aur."

"Bron Yr-Aur!?" Tom Stomped. "I'd rather take the Stairway to Heaven than the South Bound Saurez to that Gallows Pole of a place. I'm always Trampled Under Foot by Walter's Walk, the bastard!"

"I hope you prepared Tea for One, because In The Evening, Babe I'm Gonna Leave You."

Tom laughed. "Girl, You Shook Me for a sec! Thank You for putting some Misty Mountain Hop in my old Dancing Days! C'mon, lets Rock and Roll to The Wanton Song! We're Gonna Grove tonight!"

"I'm not in the mood for The Crunge anymore," Darlene said coldly. "Go ahead and play The Rain Song and dance like some Fool in the Rain. I can just as easily do the Carouselambra over at Bonzo's Montreux, or Boogie With Stu! I'm tired of your childish Candy Store Rock attitude. Your Time Is Gonna Come when you realize What Is and What Should Never Be. When The Levee Breaks, I'm off to the Houses of the Holy, find me some real men!"

"You've got the Hots On For Nowhere! No way I'm Gonna Crawl all the way to Royal Orleans to drag you back! We've got no spare money, not even No Quarter!"

"Lucky I'm taking the Night Flight then, simple and cheap, a lot like you! You never could Bring It On Home, no cash, no love."

"You honestly think they're gonna welcome you? Have a huge Celebration Day and play the Immigrant Song for you all day long? Those fools play Four Sticks in their spare time like children when they're not ogling women! You know that!"

"Than That's The Way it is then. At least I'll get some attention finally."

"But Darlene,"

"Don't be desperate! Don't go and pull some desperate Achilles Last Stand to try and win something back. We're done. Hats off To Roy Harper for truly understanding a woman's needs."

With that, Darlene packed her things that night and left Poor Tom that night. She walked towards the airport humming the Traveling Riverside Blues.

"Baby Come On Home!!" Poor Tom yelled out.

......The Lemon Song.

42 comments sorted by best / new / date

    JBThazard
    abcdlmnopxyz wrote: Someone should do a Frank Zappa one. That would be interesting. That was pretty awesome though, great job.
    My god, I love Frank Zappa and I don't know why I haven't though of that. That would be insanely challenging given the fact that there are 70+ Zappa albums, and many of his song titles are ridiculous.
    ippystratman
    my best friend and i used to spend our whole english lessons doing this with iron maiden songs good times haha
    abcdlmnopxyz
    Someone should do a Frank Zappa one. That would be interesting. That was pretty awesome though, great job.
    Jess113
    Guys think logically! Go Nirvana! "She sat down in her little apartment, drinking her pennyroyal tea, mending her heart-shaped box. Trying to get over the horrible sounds of the couple upstairs screaming 'rape me!'"... Yeah its horrible its 015 AM where I live excuse my mental capacity
    fLYinGV23
    p_a_morgan wrote: Do a Sabbath one!!
    I wrote something similar on my Youtube page years ago, here it is "I will see you After Forever so we can smoke some of that Sweet Leaf. Then we'll go with The Wizard while he visits the Rock & Roll Doctor. Never Say Die! and live for the Thrill Of It All, cause we live in a Wicked World and we're all Looking For Today. Wait a second, Am I Going Insane? Nah, I'm just Paranoid..."
    Joe-Floyd-lover
    If you don't mind, I'm probably going to do a Pink Floyd one of these.... It's a GREAT IDEA THOUGH! A+++++
    JBThazard
    Thanks so much for the kind comments, everyone. I'm rather curious why there's a lot of mixed feelings over my Dying Fetus and Metallica stories, yet this and my Opeth one have received great feedback.
    Skullivan
    McGryphon wrote: what about Steve Vai? That would make no sense. At all.
    You wanna Tender Surrender/i] to my [i]Bad Horsie ? After we're done Building the Church we can take a trip to Treasure Island and eat some Angel Food . I could go all day with this stuff.
    JBThazard
    Joe-Floyd-lover wrote: If you don't mind, I'm probably going to do a Pink Floyd one of these.... It's a GREAT IDEA THOUGH! A+++++
    Please feel free, I'm looking forward to it!
    JBThazard
    p_a_morgan wrote: Do a Sabbath one!!
    I'm currently working on an Agalloch one (considering it won't be 2-3 years old, I'm planning on making it my best so far) but Sabbath is a good idea...I'll consider it in the future.
    NickGiovanni
    JBThazard wrote: Thanks so much for the kind comments, everyone. I'm rather curious why there's a lot of mixed feelings over my Dying Fetus and Metallica stories, yet this and my Opeth one have received great feedback.
    It's cause there are Purebred Elitist Music Trolls on this site whom despise anyone that reached commercial success; branding them "sellouts" The Metallica one was halarious, I enjoyed it quite a bit, and this one is great as well! Thumbs Up to you dude!
    p_a_morgan
    JBThazard wrote: p_a_morgan wrote: Do a Sabbath one!! I'm currently working on an Agalloch one (considering it won't be 2-3 years old, I'm planning on making it my best so far) but Sabbath is a good idea...I'll consider it in the future.
    Yeah. I think the Sabbath one would be pretty awesome. Sabbath has some pretty cool song names and it would be fairly easy for it to make sense.