AmirT
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2011
248 IQ
#2
Makes me think of Message in a bottle :-)
Marqway
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2011
1,610 IQ
#3
Message in a bottle huh , well I did use to listen to that song alot maybe I was alil influenced by them anyway thank you for the feed
cheers = )
"its not the destination.... so much as the journey" one once said
HGaniere
UG's video game addict
Join date: Feb 2012
185 IQ
#4
I like the chorus feel to the song man! But there's just one thing missing to me. It's just missing more instruments. Like a nice solid drum beat, and another instrument for melody. Besides that the guitar playing is a 10/10. I can see the Buckethead influence as well.
STONESHAKER
UG Fanatic
Join date: Jun 2010
754 IQ
#5
Hey bud, figured I'd critique another one of yours since I just listened to one.

First off -- like the guitar tones and the ideas the song opens up on. Sounds like a curious conversation. I can see where the "message in a bottle" comment came from - it's your guitar tone. Is that chorus and reverb or just reverb? Either way, that's what drew the comparison b/c the composition itself sounds different.

So it's 1:56 in and while your playing isn't repetitive, the vibe has kind of worn out its welcome at this point and my ears are tired of hearing the intro. I would have used the cool clean part to segue into a different sounding section maybe closer to 1:00-1:15, then brought it back to these clean ideas at the end of the song (particularly the kind of stuff you play around 3:30).

Again, I like what you have here. It sounds good, it is well played, and your tone is excellent. It just needs to be built upon is all.

At this point I think you have critiqued all my work, but yesterday I did put up new mixes for pretty much all my stuff on my soundcloud. If you see one in my sig you'd like to critique, feel free and I'll get you a C4C.
Marqway
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2011
1,610 IQ
#6
hey Thanks stone for the critique yesturday felt alittle down after I heard " This vibe has worn out its welcome"

but then today as im reading ur crit again I notice u were refering to the intro melody has still been playing maybe I could have shortened up that part. which is cool I can live with that. for this recording It was kinda ment for a improvisation kinda bluesy thing going but I think I could have added some other stuff or changed the rhythm section for a different rhythm or just go outside for a bit then bring it back

n I will def take the advice about "Building" other things into this or with any idea so thanx
"its not the destination.... so much as the journey" one once said
Last edited by Marqway at Oct 30, 2012,
Marqway
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2011
1,610 IQ
#7
Quote by HGaniere
I like the chorus feel to the song man! But there's just one thing missing to me. It's just missing more instruments. Like a nice solid drum beat, and another instrument for melody. Besides that the guitar playing is a 10/10. I can see the Buckethead influence as well.


Hey thanks alot for the kind words aswell as the critique I think adding other instruments will add more flavour to the track appreciate it, will keep this in mind
"its not the destination.... so much as the journey" one once said
deguitar
Registered User
Join date: Aug 2011
32 IQ
#8
Great tune and very strong vibe! After first listen, the main guitar line stuck in my head afterwards. The song has color and emotion and I like the improv feel. Drums (but not too much) and melody a little more out front, with improv in-between, would help build and tell the story. Really like this one.