SilverDolphin
The Ghost Passenger
Join date: Mar 2011
472 IQ
#1
These are 2 old songs that I recorded this past two weeks. All feedback is appreciated!

'Muttations' : I wrote this last year.
http://soundcloud.com/lost-in-energy/muttations
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UZgQIp1wUo


'The Code Runner' : This one's from two years ago.
http://soundcloud.com/lost-in-energy/the-code-runner
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcAc52GSGA4

Also, if you have time, please check out this piece. It's experimental and it consists of 5 main parts. It's still MIDI but I plan on recording it in the next few weeks.
http://soundcloud.com/lost-in-energy/cumbersome-heart-midi

Thanks! C4C as always.
BjarnedeGraaf
UG's bear
Join date: May 2012
2,750 IQ
#2
Im not feeling the tone of your guitar. other than that, 2 solid punkrock tracks

btw is the first song name related to those hounds in The hunger Games?
My Soundcloud

My beginner rig:

Epiphone Goth G-400 SG
Line 6 Spider IV (Don't judge me, I was young and stupid)
Stagg SW203N
Yamaha APX500
Last edited by BjarnedeGraaf at Oct 29, 2012,
January85
Registered "User"
Join date: Jan 2009
1,048 IQ
#3
Well here's the thing. I'm listenin Muttations. The track isn't really going anywhere. It just runs in a circle. The melodies constantly sound somehow off. Is that the point somehow? I don't get it. There isn't like a real structure to the song. It's just riff after riff all played at 11 and it gets kinda tedious because nothing stands out and like I said the melodies sound off. Maybe it's the weird chord progressions. I hate to sound like this! Shit. Maybe it just sounds good to someone else.

But why such a weird chord progressions and melodies?!? Why? Like this part that starts at 0:55. That just sounds offputting! The bass somehow falls somewhere that's not on the scale and then it just repeats that. I'm not trying to be mean but just seriously does that sound good to you? This is weirding me out.

The drums are somehow incredibly noisy. They're constantly hitting everything. Is that what punk is?

Damn. Now I feel like asshole writing a comment again. Well, to me no part really sounded good in that track. There were few that were 'ok' but that won't really carry the track. In addition to that everything sounded VERY similar... almost like one riff repeated 4 minutes. There were the HITS in the middle there (where the guitar sounded incredibly like MIDI wtf?) and that's really the best part of the song... because I can actually recall it. I can't remember anything else that really happened in this song.

VOX would definately do A LOT here but I'd try to pace the song somehow more clearly. Keep some heavier parts and then have quieter parts... you know where the drums aren't going psycho! I can't concentrate on anything on this track and everything sounds weird and distorted (not gain distorted but writingwise). Man, this is a hard one to crit.

If you think the song sounds good, then please just ignore everything I said. Because in the end YOU know what YOU like and that's all that matters. I'm just trying to make sense of this in my own limited worldview. Glad you understand.

Hey if you wanna C4C after that check this out:
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1521457
SilverDolphin
The Ghost Passenger
Join date: Mar 2011
472 IQ
#4
Quote by BjarnedeGraaf
Im not feeling the tone of your guitar. other than that, 2 solid punkrock tracks
btw is the first song name related to those hounds in The hunger Games?

Thanks! Yup. If I ever write lyrics for this they would be political about how corrupted governments are like vicious creatures that fight and feed off the good and natural aspects of life. The main reason is because I suck at typing and the track's working title was "183 palm mutt" and I had just read the first book.

Quote by January85
Well here's the thing. I'm listenin Muttations. The track isn't really going anywhere. It just runs in a circle. The melodies constantly sound somehow off. Is that the point somehow? I don't get it. There isn't like a real structure to the song. It's just riff after riff all played at 11 and it gets kinda tedious because nothing stands out and like I said the melodies sound off. Maybe it's the weird chord progressions. I hate to sound like this! Shit. Maybe it just sounds good to someone else.
But why such a weird chord progressions and melodies?!? Why? Like this part that starts at 0:55. That just sounds offputting! The bass somehow falls somewhere that's not on the scale and then it just repeats that. I'm not trying to be mean but just seriously does that sound good to you? This is weirding me out.
The drums are somehow incredibly noisy. They're constantly hitting everything. Is that what punk is?
Damn. Now I feel like asshole writing a comment again. Well, to me no part really sounded good in that track. There were few that were 'ok' but that won't really carry the track. In addition to that everything sounded VERY similar... almost like one riff repeated 4 minutes. There were the HITS in the middle there (where the guitar sounded incredibly like MIDI wtf?) and that's really the best part of the song... because I can actually recall it. I can't remember anything else that really happened in this song.
VOX would definately do A LOT here but I'd try to pace the song somehow more clearly. Keep some heavier parts and then have quieter parts... you know where the drums aren't going psycho! I can't concentrate on anything on this track and everything sounds weird and distorted (not gain distorted but writingwise). Man, this is a hard one to crit.
If you think the song sounds good, then please just ignore everything I said. Because in the end YOU know what YOU like and that's all that matters. I'm just trying to make sense of this in my own limited worldview. Glad you understand.


I don't think it's clear but the structure of the song is Intro Riff-Verse-Pre Chorus-Chorus-Interlude-Intro Riff-Verse-Pre Chorus-Chorus-Breakdown-Interlude-Pre Chorus-Chorus. (If that makes sense)
Weird chord progressions? They're pretty basic chord progressions, just played as dyads and inversions. I'm not sure what you heard but the melodies and bass are in key and sound good to me. I noticed that the guitars sounded like MIDI as well but I honestly don't know why.
Anyway, thanks for the feedback! Highly appreciated