i know what i'm on, the names of the toxins in my blood-

they pilot me wrong, up near the breakneck of gravity
where they let me go
oh so casually.

it's where i always see her as my love,
cheeks blushed with freckles, the sun in her eyes.
for me she has no place in this world-
she's only the prototype.

i wake under billowed covers, bones brittle,
as the strange echo of life sits outside my window.
in the mirror his face looks mangled
though somehow a shine of malignant hope
is there in his eyes

god bless his soul

for it is those truly lost who look elsewhere for these stolen years
whereas i know it's i, and i alone,
who's to blame for how alone i feel.
here, My Dear, here it is