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#4401
I'm hosting an African themed party tonight.
There's no food and the drinks are 12 miles away.

What's black and laughs ?
A sn*gger

What begins with N and ends with R that you don't want to call a black person ?
"Neighbour"

Being a sexist doesn't bother me at all. The only people who will call me a sexist are women and their opinion doesn't matter.

Why didn't Superman stop the 9/11 attacks ?
Because he's a quadriplegic.
Last edited by lemmyisgod97 at Sep 22, 2013,
#4404
I'm not sure this one's been told. But one of my staff told me this when I was on course this summer:

-Hey, did you know Princess Diana was on the radio?

-Really?

-And on the windshield, and the dashboard, and the steering wheel...


Numero dos,

-Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?

-Nope.

-Yeah she totally did, they found her head and shoulders in the glovebox.


Combine this script with a Afghanistan war vet who just constantly spews hilarious shit from his mouth despite his steady seriousface stare.


Also, I should point out, I really don't get why everyone liked that woman, aside from the fact that she was a humanitarian (like thousands of others). Basically she was a glorified humanitarian because she was royalty. And royalty nowadays ain't such a good thing. Except if you get married, then every woman on earth will fall in love with you and your wife for a few weeks and will dream about your wedding forever.
Last edited by metalblaster at Oct 13, 2013,
#4405
Who holds the record for the fastest reader in the world ?
911 victims, they went through 110 stories in 8 seconds.

If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then every year we could save millions of mosquito's dying needlessly of aids.
#4406
not a joke but it fits in with this thread

jamaal the black guy
had a very dark skin color
and if you ever saw it
it was obviously during the day time

all of the white people
used to laugh and call him names
they never let poor jamaal
join in any basketball games

then one foggy christmas ever
the police came to say
jamaal the black guy
you're under arrest for automotive theft

then the white people tried him
and they gave the verdict with glee
jamaal the black guy
you're going to prison
*your ad here*
#4407
;_;
It's over simplified, So what!

Quote by eGraham
I'm going to be on top of what is called a knob
Quote by theguitarist
Big ones can be fun in some ways but generally, they are a pain in the ass.
Quote by Wolfinator-x
I don't know what is going on in this thread or why I have an erection.
#4408
Quote by theogonia777
not a joke but it fits in with this thread

jamaal the black guy
had a very dark skin color
and if you ever saw it
it was obviously during the day time

all of the white people
used to laugh and call him names
they never let poor jamaal
join in any basketball games

then one foggy christmas ever
the police came to say
jamaal the black guy
you're under arrest for automotive theft

then the white people tried him
and they gave the verdict with glee
jamaal the black guy
you're going to prison


I tried to sing it in my head, it really doesn't work with the song and the lyrics are stupid.
#4409
A pedophile was walking through the woods in the middle of the night with a little boy, the little boy said, "I'm scared" and the pedophile replied, "Your scared, i'm the one who has to walk home alone"

A man was walking through a forest when beside the top of a cliff he came across a crying boy, he asked the boy what was wrong and he said, "My mom fell off the cliff and died, and my dad fell off trying to save her and he's dead too", the man begins to take off his belt and trousers and the boy says, "Why are you taking your trousers off ?" and the man says "Son, this is not your lucky day".
#4410
Quote by ehbacon
I tried to sing it in my head, it really doesn't work with the song and the lyrics are stupid.


you have to sing it along that theme from that disney movie

song of the south
*your ad here*
#4414
This thread....

My wife just asked me why I was grinning and lol'ing a lot..

She would probably kill me for laughing at some of these

Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#4415
The one thing ask.fm has showed us is that people would rather kill themselves than lose a bit of weight.
#4418
Are you an arm amputee who's stumped for cash ? Earn a second income taking impressive fisting photos.

Statistically 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

Women get yeast infections so they know what it's like living with an irritating c*nt for once.
#4419
not really bad but...
statistically 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy...
#4420
Quote by lemmyisgod97
Are you an arm amputee who's stumped for cash ? Earn a second income taking impressive fisting photos.

Statistically 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

Women get yeast infections so they know what it's like living with an irritating c*nt for once.

I'd expect nothing less
#4427
a large black man at work told me his name was gorilla and i was not comfortable calling him that.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#4428
Quote by jakesmellspoo
a large black man at work told me his name was gorilla and i was not comfortable calling him that.




here's a joke on blacks i remember hearing on a stand up comedy a while ago...


I remember working as a limo driver, not long ago. One day, I had a passenger named Boyed. We started up some small talk, but i made sure not to accidentally say "boy" (because young slave men were often called "boy" by their masters), so...

me :"where are you headed, boy-ED"
balck man: "im headed to..."

then when we arrived at the at the place, i said, and made to sure to say "have a nice day, boy-ED"

it was a close one, that one
#4429
Me and my mates were filming in Paris

We just finished shooting
You hit 'em and they get back up
I hit 'em and they stay down
- Frank Castle
#4430
Quote by cha33 armstrong
Me and my mates were filming in Paris

We just finished shooting

Tooooo soooooooon.