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#1
I'm kinda sick, got a bit of a cold, so my mom told me that someone told her that sleeping nest to an onion helps. Somehow.

So now I got an onion cut up in half in a bowl next to me bed.

What's the weirdest thing you've slept with, beside my mother?
#2
Your father


no homo
___

Quote by The_Blode
she was saying things like... do you want to netflix and chill but just the chill part...too bad she'll never know that I only like the Netflix part...
Last edited by WCPhils at Jan 5, 2013,
#4
Super Nintendo

When I was younger I had one of those in-car DVD player screens plugged into it and I played Super Mario RPG while lying in bed.

EDIT: Apparently this thread is for sexy jokes... Awkward...
#5
Quote by WCPhils
Your father

Quote by KiLLSWiTCH-KnoT
it's like I make threads knowing they're gonna be shit but I make them anyway


Quote by kertets
Wire his sack to the electrical socket the next time, little fucker will be shootin lightening bolts all over the house.
#6
My gameboy under my pillow when I was little.
Quote by thePTOD
I love you.
#9
Quote by PeZ546
I had an onion tied round my belt, which was the style at the time.

At the time?


OT: A serb.
She was born in 1898 in a barn. She died on the thirty-seventh floor of a skyscraper. She's an astronaut.
#10
Quote by blake1221
You're going to reek in the morning.

Yeah OP your mom is playing a trick on you.

Quote by emad
jthm_guitarist
Warned for trolling!


Quote by metal4eva_22
Didn't you say that you had a stuffed fox that you would occasionally fuck?

Quote by Axelfox
It's not a fox,it's a wolf.
#11
A wooden sword.


Don't judge me.
Quote by rocklee1431
Wow, these all suck. Except for the Moth Whisperer over there.


Quote by VanTheKraut
If you voted anything other this, you're wrong and a queer and I personally challenge every last one of you to pistols at dawn.
#12
I've heard people say that too. It makes no sense to me, at all.


In my restless dreams...
I see that town.
Silent Hill.
You promised you'd take me there again someday.
But you never did.

Well, I'm alone there now.
In our 'special place'...
Waiting for you.

#14
sometimes when i'm chewing gum in bed i'm too comfortable to get up and throw it out so i just stick it on my nuts (pretty much the best spot if you actually think about it)
#15
Quote by Shredoftheday
OROGERS are like onions trheyu have laywer s



wut?
Quote by rocklee1431
Wow, these all suck. Except for the Moth Whisperer over there.


Quote by VanTheKraut
If you voted anything other this, you're wrong and a queer and I personally challenge every last one of you to pistols at dawn.
#16
Quote by hornet224
wut?

>Using a public restroom in the bad part of town
>Really bad diarrhea
>Someone comes in tries to open the door of the stall I'm in, I say it's occupied
>See a big brown eye stare in at me through the crack of the door
>He says nothing and I can hear him walking back to the bathroom door
>To my horror I hear sounds of the door locking as the smell of onions begins to fill the air, shortly followed by the light switch being turned off
>The last thing I remember hearing is "Don't worry, this will be ogre soon."
>Wake up in an dumpster in another part of town with no pants, a prolapsed anus, and a fractured pelvis
>Doctors said I was lucky to be alive; police never found out who was responsible

MORAKL of the stoory : OP dont sleep with a onioni
#17
I think I've accidentally slept on a hangar once.
And my wallet.
And jacket.
And my backpack.

Other than that, nothing.
Quote by jrcsgtpeppers
The act of playing the guitar isn't supposed to be entertaining.
#19
Every time jetfuel posts, I find myself mesmerized by his avatar rather than reading his post. Is that normal?
Quote by rocklee1431
Wow, these all suck. Except for the Moth Whisperer over there.


Quote by VanTheKraut
If you voted anything other this, you're wrong and a queer and I personally challenge every last one of you to pistols at dawn.
#20
Quote by hornet224
Every time jetfuel posts, I find myself mesmerized by his avatar rather than reading his post. Is that normal?

no

that's a boy
#22
Slept ON two bags of compost one night when I was 16.
Quote by neidnarb11890
the chinese take-out place my family always ordered from gave you chopsticks, so as a kid it was fun to try & eat with chopsticks
now i just use a fork, 'cuz nothing is fun anymore & i just want to shovel food into my mouth to fill the void
#23
Quote by blake1221
You're going to reek in the morning.

I doubt that is different from any other morning of his.
--------------╯╰--------------
A SIGNATURE.
--------------╮╭--------------
#24
I thought an onion was a layered woman that stinks and makes people cry?
you're a stone fox
#25
Quote by urbandictionary
1. onion 580 up, 164 down

an ounce of cocaine
"takin' orders is sunnin, an ounce of coke is an onion" R.I.P. BIG-L


That'll take your mind off a cold no doubt.
Quote by EpiExplorer
I swear this guy in particular writes for the telegraph or some shit.

Quote by Fat Lard
My name can actually be traced back to as early as the 1990s, it means "fuck off data miner"
#27
Apparently all the bacteria and stuff are like "fuck staying on this human, there's an onion we can decimate!". So the onion takes one for the team.
#28
for a school band trip i had to sleep with another guy

but we wore pyjamas and put pillows between each other and shit because bro code
#29
A Thai girl. If you're not careful, you'll find out that maybe they are Thai, but they might not be a girl. Luckily she was a girl. Seriously though in Thailand they have a lot of crossdressers.
#30
Quote by Shredoftheday
no

that's a boy
piss off shred you know she's a girl
Quote by yoman297
for a school band trip i had to sleep with another guy

but we wore pyjamas and put pillows between each other and shit because bro code
how would you cuddle up if you had pillows between each other
#31
Quote by jetfuel495
how would you cuddle up if you had pillows between each other


trust me the room was hot enough

don't need no more body heat

no homo
#32
Quote by Nickpocalypse
Super Nintendo

When I was younger I had one of those in-car DVD player screens plugged into it and I played Super Mario RPG while lying in bed.

EDIT: Apparently this thread is for sexy jokes... Awkward...


Its ok I slept with my Joystick once...
#33
My dog
One of the third friendliest users
Stratkat's pet


Quote by Momentosis
Void is a wanker that's why

Last edited by FireFromTheVoid at Jan 5, 2013,
#34
I once slept with a...

Actually I'd rather not say. It wasn't a pretty site anyways.
7-piece drum mic set for sale. See classifieds.
#35
I take things to the next level by sleeping with an Ogre

...modes and scales are still useless.


Quote by PhoenixGRM
Hey guys could you spare a minute to Vote for my band. Go to the site Search our band Listana with CTRL+F for quick and vote Thank you .
Quote by sam b
Voted for Patron Çıldırdı.

Thanks
Quote by PhoenixGRM
But our Band is Listana
#36
Quote by DonGlover
I doubt that is different from any other morning of his.


Thank you Donglover.

I needed that.


#38
Quote by durhamdynamo
My girlfriend. In my parents bed.


Done this, in her parents' bed. She wants to in their shower, too.
#39
Quote by Shredoftheday
>Using a public restroom in the bad part of town
>Really bad diarrhea
>Someone comes in tries to open the door of the stall I'm in, I say it's occupied
>See a big brown eye stare in at me through the crack of the door
>He says nothing and I can hear him walking back to the bathroom door
>To my horror I hear sounds of the door locking as the smell of onions begins to fill the air, shortly followed by the light switch being turned off
>The last thing I remember hearing is "Don't worry, this will be ogre soon."
>Wake up in an dumpster in another part of town with no pants, a prolapsed anus, and a fractured pelvis
>Doctors said I was lucky to be alive; police never found out who was responsible

MORAKL of the stoory : OP dont sleep with a onioni

wait wat
#40
Quote by Junglie
My gameboy under my pillow when I was little.


This. I left some pokemans at the daycare center and kept my Gameboy on during the night. I remember it didn't work as well as i hoped it would but i don't remember exactly what pokemon i left there or how much xp they gained.
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