#1
This is a short, free-verse poem that I wrote after reading Thoreau's greatly inspiring, transcendental essay, Civil Disobedience. Please tell me what you think, I would really appreciate it.

The illness spreads.
The patient's body rejects the remedy.
His mind screams in it's passing moment,
"Rebel! Rebel! Rebel! Rebel!"
The screams abate until they cease to exist.
The doctors ponder,
"What shall we do with him?"
One responds,
"There is no hope for this one, throw him into the fire."

...And society is reduced to a mound of ash.

EDIT: why doesn't anyone ever say anything about my work? is it just that terrible?
Last edited by Vol=11 at Dec 3, 2008,
#2
some just may not know what to say


personally i like what it stands for
very nice
Call me Justyn

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#3
I like it, it's very cynical and blunt.

Some do not know what to say.
There are very few people here who actively fully critique every piece.
You need to go out and crit other peoples, and ask for a return.