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#3
put them on hold, it's funny how long some of them will wait+if they hate their job they get a break
I've Made You A Drawing of a Giraffe Fucking an Elephant. Notice How His Moustache Looks Just Like Mine.

Your Mother's Got a Penis
#7
i used to be a telemarketer. you can dress and look however you want. no drug tests. you sit in the airconditioning all day. you can eat at your desk. and i made 12.50 an hour.
#8
I've always wanted to try the Seinfeld way. It's definitely the best manner I've seen.

Either that or pull a Ventrilo Harrassment and respond only with Arnold Schwarzenegger soundboards.
Quote by HorizonShadow
Just eat the headstock.

That'll make you look mad.
#10
I try to sell them things, it's funny.
♪♫♪
92% percent of the teen population would be dead if Hollywood said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore.
Put this in your signature if you are one of the 92% who wouldn't be breathing.
#11
I suddenly remember one calling me either Friday night, Saturday morning or Evening or Sunday morning. I can't remember exactly 'cause I was drunk. Or if it even happened. Anyway, I just swore down the phone a lot because they inturrupted me... They hung up. Didn't even say sorry. Bastards.
#12
Threads like this are why I love the Pit. Sorry for bumping it.

Anyways, back on topic. I've never messed with telemarketers, but my sister has. She would answer the phone and start imitating a toddler by asking the caller to sing her a song and she would also ask for her crayons (all in a baby-ish tone of voice of course). She hasn't done it for over a year though- I kinda hope she'll be doing it again sometime soon.

EDIT: Does anyone have any good telemarketer pranks for me to pull? I'm dying to piss some of them off.
Quote by Kikuta
Sell your Valvestate to brainless 17 year old for mighty sums of dollars. Purchase a JMP for a pittance from a desperate seller. Masturbate to pictures of yourself and your new, real Marshall. Eternal glory awaits.

Last edited by rocknrolldude43 at Nov 2, 2009,
#16
My older brother once started yelling at his girlfriend to get on the ground and made threats to kill her in between acting polite to the telemarketer. His girlfriend picked up on what he was doing and started screaming from the other room.

After hanging up, the telemarketer called the cops.

True story.
#18
I name objects until they hang up.

I speak Spanish(5years of it baby!)

I try to sell them things

I sit there and say nothing.

All of which work, especially saying items, or play ispy
Quote by 23:50 inbleach
can't i just eat the fucking cactus?

Quote by WildChicken
Go suck a cat westdyolf!

Quote by Cat Of Pain
So, West...

I hear you'll suck my cat...

Ill suck your cat
PEACE LOVE PANCAKES
call me zach

chocolate chip pancakes!
#19
Quote by archangels666
My older brother once started yelling at his girlfriend to get on the ground and made threats to kill her in between acting polite to the telemarketer. His girlfriend picked up on what he was doing and started screaming from the other room.

After hanging up, the telemarketer called the cops.

True story.



Obvious troll is obvious.

They can't do that.

Sorry for the double post, had to call him out lol
Quote by 23:50 inbleach
can't i just eat the fucking cactus?

Quote by WildChicken
Go suck a cat westdyolf!

Quote by Cat Of Pain
So, West...

I hear you'll suck my cat...

Ill suck your cat
PEACE LOVE PANCAKES
call me zach

chocolate chip pancakes!
#20
*Puts phone near exposed anus*

*Farts*
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#22
There was this one that called my grandma like 30 times. I answered one time and after they got done speaking I went "**** me in the ass with a spoon"

Never called back
#23
"Hey, I can't talk to you right now, but can you leave me your house number so I can call you at your house later? Oh, you can't? Then don't do the same for me. *hangs up*"

Edit:

Quote by Athetosis
I've always wanted to try the Seinfeld way. It's definitely the best manner I've seen.

FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
Last edited by Alex Vik at Nov 2, 2009,
#24
Quote by Alex Vik
"Hey, I can't talk to you right now, but can you leave me your house number so I can call you at your house later? Oh, you can't? Then don't do the same for me. *hangs up*"


Heh, my dad does that.

Tireedit: watched the video too.
Last edited by Tire Me. at Nov 2, 2009,
#25
Quote by Nelsean
*Puts phone near exposed anus*

*Farts*




Good one!
Quote by Kikuta
Sell your Valvestate to brainless 17 year old for mighty sums of dollars. Purchase a JMP for a pittance from a desperate seller. Masturbate to pictures of yourself and your new, real Marshall. Eternal glory awaits.

#26
I just read this in a YouTube comment.


Actually, the best way to answer a telemarketer is to answer "Hola. No hablo ingles" until the person says they will call back with a Spanish speaking person. Then when that person calls talk in English saying you don't speak Spanish. Trust me, this works on most telemarketers. Not only does it confuse them, but its loads of fun as long as you have nothing else to do.

Sounds awesome.
#27
Quote by Nelsean
*Puts phone near exposed anus*

*Farts*

Haha, I wouldn't want to be someone else who has to use that phone!

Reminds me of when I was on the phone to the missus and jokingly got her to 'talk' to my penis. Then I realised that the mouthpiece was on my bellend and was like 'lol, I don't envy my flatmates!'
#28
Quote by crazy8rgood
I just don't answer the phone.

Get's them every time.


Me too!
CALL ME JOHN

MARSHALL JCM 2000 Amp head/Cab
White Synyster Custom 1/100
Rest of my rig on my profile!


Don't acknowledge right, just dwell on...


...Wrong.



This spot in Hell...


...Is where I belong
#30
Quote by rocknrolldude43
Threads like this are why I love the Pit. Sorry for bumping it.

Anyways, back on topic. I've never messed with telemarketers, but my sister has. She would answer the phone and start imitating a toddler by asking the caller to sing her a song and she would also ask for her crayons (all in a baby-ish tone of voice of course). She hasn't done it for over a year though- I kinda hope she'll be doing it again sometime soon.

EDIT: Does anyone have any good telemarketer pranks for me to pull? I'm dying to piss some of them off.


No, but you seem to love bumping year old topics, You should be a mortician.
My gear:
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#31
Quote by GruntOfAction
No, but you seem to love bumping year old topics, You should be a mortician.

I know, but it at least shows that I use the searchbar.
Quote by Kikuta
Sell your Valvestate to brainless 17 year old for mighty sums of dollars. Purchase a JMP for a pittance from a desperate seller. Masturbate to pictures of yourself and your new, real Marshall. Eternal glory awaits.

#32
This is probably the best one i've ever heard. It's from a radio show but Check it out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI
#34
Quote by jymellis
i used to be a telemarketer. you can dress and look however you want. no drug tests. you sit in the airconditioning all day. you can eat at your desk. and i made 12.50 an hour.

dude you serious? I think ive found my job in life...
------------------------------------------------------------------------
your insane, but reasonable
#35
Telemarketer: Hello, I'd like to tell you about a special offe...
Me: No, thank you. Really not interested.
Telemarker: This will only take a moment of your time. (starts into sales pitch script)

At this point, I quietly put the phone on the table and walk away and go about my business. I return in about 10 minutes. Quietly place my ear near the phone. Is the dufus still talking or am I hearing that tone you get when someone hangs up, but you don't. If he's still talking, I quietly leave and return a bit later. When he's finished and has hung up, I just hang up the phone.

One guy was so pissed off about this that he called back and started going on and on and on, about how rude I had been. I quietly placed the phone on the table...
Meadows
Quote by Jackal58
I release my inner liberal every morning when I take a shit.
Quote by SK8RDUDE411
I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
#36
Quote by Athetosis
I've always wanted to try the Seinfeld way. It's definitely the best manner I've seen.


When I worked as a telemarketer, this happened to me. I went along with it because I own.
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#37
why would you mess with telemarketers, at least they're working
Yours Sincerely,


Dr. Speakers
#38
Quote by speakers
why would you mess with telemarketers
because I can. any other questions, kid?
Meadows
Quote by Jackal58
I release my inner liberal every morning when I take a shit.
Quote by SK8RDUDE411
I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
#40
Quote by bloodlust_panda
dude you serious? I think ive found my job in life...

I'm pretty sure that's according to how much stuff you sell.
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