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#1
I wanted to start a thread, just for satirical purposes, because I noticed certain types of players gravitate to certain guitars. You folks can contribute if you see a model you wanna peg. I'm grilling sacred cows from all camps, so don't get all offended.


The Gibson Les Paul Player

I play strictly with t3h f33ling and don't mind saying so. I'm usually a Jimmy Page or Slash nuthugger, and I think Shredding is a bunch of nonsense. When asked about my playing, I usually say I like to play The Bl00s or classic rock. I might also be a fan of emo bands and I like to look like my favorite geetarists. Versatility is for lamers. I don't need no whammy bar or 5-way selector switch. I just use my POD if I wanna make my guitar sound like Billy Armstrong's.


The Fender Stratocaster Player

I, too, like to play with t3h f33ling, sometimes even more than The Les Paul guys. I'm a little more into versatility, though, and I like to stack every effect known to man between my amplifier and me. I'm often a Hendrix and SRV nuthugger, and I spend my kids' college tuition on vintage gear because I'm not skilled enough to get a decent sound out of new equipment. I'm okay with 21 frets, because I don't solo real high, anyway, I mean, that's for the shreddz0rz right?


The Ibanez RG Player

I'm not much into playing with t3h f33ling, or with technique, really. I'm gay for Head and Munky, and big strings are my thing. Solos are usually a no-no, but I like to ride my wah and pick one note over and over again when I do play a solo. I dont use my whammy bar much. It's just there to look cool. I claim I loved to listen to Yngwie Malmsteen and MAB, but I never show any of their influence when you hear me play, mostly just a bunch of detuned noise played with one or two fingers. Hehe... my fingers smell funny, by the way.

The Jackson Dinky and RR Player

I love technique AND Feeling, but my biggest thing is trying to outplay everybody I come across. Guitar playing is a contest, and I'm gonna pwn all the n00bs. Randy Rhoads is God, and I'm his pope. I hate everything that has to do with non-technical guitar, and I openly loathe any and all mainstream rock or metal to let everyone know how musically enlightened and exclusive I am. I'm not much on effects, but Morley seems to be my bag.
Tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.
#3
Quote by ConfederateAxe
The Ibanez RG Player

I'm not much into playing with t3h f33ling, or with technique, really. I'm gay for Head and Munky, and big strings are my thing. Solos are usually a no-no.

Wat?
#4
I thought that the Strat one was hilarious: "I spend my kids' college tuition on vintage gear because I'm not skilled enough to get a decent sound out of new equipment."
#5
Quote by hazzmatazz
My Strat has 22 Frets though...


i think quite a few strats do

highway 1 deffo does, not quite show what else
#6
Wow, that's the most obnoxious set of stereotypes I've ever heard.

I have a strat.

I'm nothing like that.

F**k you.


#7
The Custom Gibson Les Paul DC 'GibRetschBacker' Player

You are Aidy. No-one has a guitar like yours, because yours is, like, custom. Yeah. You change your hair colour more than your underwear and you rape your analog delay pedal. Despite being a good guitarist and frontman, you have a bass clef tattooed on your left wrist- why?

Because you have a Custom Gibson Les Paul DC 'GibRetschBacker'.
#9
Figured a few of you would get all butt-hurt. Go write a song about it. It's a joke. I own an RG and I'm nothing like the RG player i mentioned. Get over it.
Tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.
#10
My name is Conferderate Axe. I have a uterus and two fallopian tubes. My mum makes my sandwiches and puts them in my lunchbox which I eat at 12.30 at school. In the weekends me and my friends watch saddle club and talk about all the hot guys at school. then when I get lonely I go on a guitar website and try and get some company from some big boys.
#11
It amused me slightly.

Mostly due to not being anywhere in the list.
Now 100% humour free, in accordance with the rules.

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#12
The Ibanez RG Player

I'm not much into playing with t3h f33ling, or with technique, really. I'm gay for Head and Munky, and big strings are my thing. Solos are usually a no-no, but I like to ride my wah and pick one note over and over again when I do play a solo. I dont use my whammy bar much. It's just there to look cool. I claim I loved to listen to Yngwie Malmsteen and MAB, but I never show any of their influence when you hear me play, mostly just a bunch of detuned noise played with one or two fingers. Hehe... my fingers smell funny, by the way.


that couldn't be further from the truth lol.
i dont like yngwie malmstein, never heard of MAB, and i use all 5 fingers (even thumb) because i play mainly john mayer blues stuff (hence why i use thumb, cos ya need to) and my guitars always in tune thank you very much...

these stereotypes are bollox...
#13
i dont think he meant it seriously, i found it funny.
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#15
So I'm a combination of all but the strat? STFU
The DNA results show that Jeremy Kyle is a nob.


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#16
The Custom Gibson Les Paul DC 'GibRetschBacker' Player

You are Aidy. No-one has a guitar like yours, because yours is, like, custom. Yeah. You change your hair colour more than your underwear and you rape your analog delay pedal. Despite being a good guitarist and frontman, you have a bass clef tattooed on your left wrist- why?

Because you have a Custom Gibson Les Paul DC 'GibRetschBacker'.


Haha. Well played, sir.
Tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.
#17
I laughed
Fender Telecaster Mexico
Marshall vs265
Morgan Acoustic
Jim Dunlop CGB-95 wah
#18
Fernandes Dragonfly Pro

You like otters, smoke Amber Leaf and your poo is pure white and has no smell.
#22
Cheap Asian Copy Of A Les Paul

You like the blues, and t3h shreds, and t3h mellow acoustics, but your attention span is too short to bother learning anything new. You constantly run through all the songs you already know, never bothering to learn anything else. You can alternate pick like a mofo but when it comes to playing anything with substance, you're screwed. You like every kind of music there is and are very non-committal when it comes to bands.

....Half true.
Quote by sheumack111
I allways found that having sex while listening to Tool/Planet X/Dream Theater was hard because every time you tryed o keep the beat they would change time sig, then you would get pissed off and then loose your mojo for the nite.....

I fucking Lol'd
#23
Quote by ConfederateAxe
I wanted to start a thread, just for satirical purposes, because I noticed certain types of players gravitate to certain guitars. You folks can contribute if you see a model you wanna peg. I'm grilling sacred cows from all camps, so don't get all offended.


The Gibson Les Paul Player

I play strictly with t3h f33ling and don't mind saying so. I'm usually a Jimmy Page or Slash nuthugger, and I think Shredding is a bunch of nonsense. When asked about my playing, I usually say I like to play The Bl00s or classic rock. I might also be a fan of emo bands and I like to look like my favorite geetarists. Versatility is for lamers. I don't need no whammy bar or 5-way selector switch. I just use my POD if I wanna make my guitar sound like Billy Armstrong's.

That's the biggest pile of bull**** I've ever heard.
I'm a Les Paul player, because I like the feel of the guitar.
I do play blues and classic rock, I also play hard rock, power metal, symphonic and prog metal.
-.-
May the Force be with You.
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#24
^
Ever heard of a little thing called a joke?


"The Purple-Shirted Eye stabber"
"I don't care what you say, I don't care what you do. I'm not gonna be a mud hippy... like you!"

#25
Yeah guys, he's just generalizing because there ARE people like that.


I found it funny because I've had all those guitars.
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#26
Quote by Jens57
^
Ever heard of a little thing called a joke?



No, explain this concept of "joke" to me.
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Dammit, beaten to it, and by someone with the same name

CURSE YOU TOMMYT!!!!!!!!!!!!


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#29
So stupid I forgot to facepalm.
"We were one among the fence"
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#30
Quote by jeremessmore
Do an SG do an SG! I just felt left out since I hate all guitars named or explorer or schecter c1 classic? please?


So now we have to cater threads to the all mighty you!?


So selfish.
Quote by zgr0826
My culture is worthless and absolutely inferior to the almighty Leaf.


Quote by JustRooster
I incurred the wrath of the Association of White Knights. Specifically the Parent's Basement branch of service.
#32
I have a ghetto-ass Fender because...hell, i'm just happy to have it.
I hit the bottle a little too hard last night lol.
#33
I'll post some more later on. I just posted those few to test the waters and see how many with no sense of humor would cry foul.
Tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.
#36
Apparently, TS is a master in analyzing people by their guitars..
Care to analyze me? I'm not in your list, so.. here's my guitar:
#38
Quote by ZeGuitarist
Apparently, TS is a master in analyzing people by their guitars..
Care to analyze me? I'm not in your list, so.. here's my guitar:


I'll write a general Tele one soon, but I'm not gonna target specific people. I will say, however, that I'm glad you had the good sense to get a tele with Humbuckers.
Tastes like chicken, if chicken was a candy.
#39
Yea, I got it for its versatility, that's also a reason why I didn't like the standard singlecoil Tele pickups... This one was just way more flexible than other Teles, plus more beautiful by far
#40
Quote by boreamor
I have an LP copy and I want a whammy bar


Les Paul copies are the bomb. The main reason I like them is because they DON'T have a whammy bar.
Quote by sheumack111
I allways found that having sex while listening to Tool/Planet X/Dream Theater was hard because every time you tryed o keep the beat they would change time sig, then you would get pissed off and then loose your mojo for the nite.....

I fucking Lol'd
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