dude, that was tight. beginning riff was pretty sweet.

the only thing I'd change is on that last little half step interval whatever, I'd add in the bend.

but otherwise, very well written. a bit cliche, but still cool.
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...

...You're still disappointing them...
I actually REALLY liked this. Proper up my street.
The intro was awesome, really worked for the rest of the song and the build up to the verse.
Verse sounded good as well, bit cliché but it worked.
My favourite bit was the chorus, i thought (Even though it's used alot) it worked really well and sounded freakin' awesome.
I was let down by the solo a little bit, thought you were gonna through a bellter at me, but it didn't happen. Maybe work on that?

The "close your eyes" bit actually made me pump my fist a little bit .
Had me nodding my head all the way through.

That was seriously good. I really enjoyed almost all of it, some excellent riffs in there. As BC_Warlock said, the solo was a bit of a letdown if I'm honest, maybe it could be improved. Otherwise though, it was excellent. I liked the outro a lot. Nice work. I'd love to hear the recorded version!

Crit one of mine in my sig? Preferably the second post-hardcore one.
Schecter C-1 Hellraiser
Ibanez GRG170DX
Peavey Vypyr 75
Fender Princeton 650 DSP w/ Celestion 80w speaker
Last edited by Friendly Stoat at Dec 3, 2008,
Bar 5 onwards till the verse comes in, awesome! I really liked the unison bends going on there, really adds to the song, I muted the channel to see what the song would sound like w/o it and the song doesn't even sound half as good w/o it lol.

Post Chorus, IMO, does not sound that great, it fits the song/mood but I honestly think you can come up w/ something a wee bit better, listen to some Arch Enemy to get an idea of how they do post chorus', cuz if you ask me they do it perfect every time no matter the song.

Solo was a let down like someone said (after listening to the chorus I was expecting something more), but letdown or not it fits the song, not every song has to have a 200bpm 16th note solo in it, speaking of which from now on I'm cutting my solos by half, I overuse them, your solo in this song is a good example of "proper solo use" as I'd put it.

The outro (specifically the riff at bar 103) can be turned into one hell of a crazy ground pounding breakdown hint hint.


Please critique mine?
Wow, nice job dude.
This song is very good.
Love the chorus leads.
The pre-chorus wasn't the greatest, but it worked.
Yeah, the solo was more of a riff. Still awesome though.
Very post-hardcore. Nice job.