Page 1 of 9
#1
Ok, it's pretty much like the old battle rap thread.
A few rules though.

A minimum of 2 lines, so no one line 'yeah well you suck' kinda things.
A maximum of 8 lines.
If you include a bit of praise in your post that's fine, but you've got to put a rap in there.
Keep memes to a minimum.

Other than that, rap your heart out.

You all better listen to my tasty rhymes,
Fit into no more than 8 f*cking lines,
'Coz that's the rules, and I might be bad,
But rules is rules, so follow them fag.
hello
Last edited by opc100 at Jan 25, 2009,
#2
There once was a man from Nantucket
Who..
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#3
Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you.

Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.
Quote by bendystraw
I go down on one knee and do that shit cello style

#4
Cuz I'm a fast mother****er,
Let me tell you 'bout it sucker,
If you **** with me, I'll **** your mother,
Your sister, too, and your best girlfriend,
Then I'll line 'em up, and put 'em end to end,
And then I'll put (stick) it in, I'll pull it out,
I'll grab your face and then I'll cum in your mouth.
It tastes good, don't it?
,___,
[O.o]
/)__)
-"--"-

,___,
[¬.¬]
/)__)
-"--"-



Quote by FishCream
Stop Performing Meathook Sodomy On Yourself
#5
Quote by slaveofsatan
Cuz I'm a fast mother****er,
Let me tell you 'bout it sucker,
If you **** with me, I'll **** your mother,
Your sister, too, and your best girlfriend,
Then I'll line 'em up, and put 'em end to end,
And then I'll put (stick) it in, I'll pull it out,
I'll grab your face and then I'll cum in your mouth.
It tastes good, don't it?



Here I am. Your rocket queen oh yeah.
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#6
Slave of Satan?
I bet ya real name's Leighton
You grew up in private school
So shut ya mouth, ya sound like a fool

..
Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#7
Isn't it supposed to be "Rap Battle"?
Here's what the critics are saying about Hanzi_G:

Quote by SteveHouse
Hanzi_G = god damned prophet.

SIG ME GODDAMMIT
#8
Quote by Hanzi_G
Isn't it supposed to be "Rap Battle"?


Yeah but them rappers never been spellers have they?
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#9
Quote by Tomosaurus
Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you.

Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

Dude, this was never cool. Now let it ****ing go you absolute arse.
hello
#10
All of you hoes are gay
Call me the pope,
You better listen to what I say
I wreck shop on pussy all day
From dusk til dawn
then i pull it out and
SKEET SKEET SKEET on your mom.
#12
Quote by opc100
You all better listen to my tasty rhymes,
Fit into no more than 8 f*cking lines,
'Coz that's the rules, and I might be bad,
But rules is rules, so follow them fag.


Sure, you bring out rhymes one after another,
but you weren't saying that when I bummed your mother,
she's locked in my cupboard and she's begging for a ride,
so think who you're fucking with and bury your pride.
VENUSIAN
FB SC BC TW
Patterns In The Ivy present ethnicity on an intriguing and dedicated level. ~Ambient Exotica
A mesmeric melange of yearning voice, delicate piano and carefully chosen samples. ~Lost Voices
#13
"I wanna see your bum, I don’t care what you say,
No I don’t have feelings cause feelings are gay.
Something something in the month of May,
Bitches love my penis cause it’s really big."
Got on the bus with me daysavaaaa
#14
I, pulled, up to a house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie "Yo Holmes, smell ya later!"

I looked at my kingdom I was finally there!
To settle my throne, as the Prince of Bel-Air.
Quote by bendystraw
I go down on one knee and do that shit cello style

#15
Polly Put The Kettle On,
Polly Put The Kettle On,


Quote by Spoonman69
Rap is music,far better than metal for example. id much rather hear about hoes and anal sex than dragons and supressed homosexuality.
#16
Quote by weemansyndrome
"I wanna see your bum, I don’t care what you say,
No I don’t have feelings cause feelings are gay.
Something something in the month of May,
Bitches love my penis cause it’s really big."

I disagree,
It's only tiny,
I have intercourse with your mother
'Cause she does it for free
Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#17
Quote by Viva-la-mark
I disagree,
It's only tiny,
I have intercourse with your mother
'Cause she does it for free

If that was me, I'd find that quite creepy,
Because 52, or is it 53,
I don't really know, and i don't really care,
'Coz I'm rapping to a guy with no pubic hair.

Suck on it bitch.
hello
#18
Quote by opc100
If that was me, I'd find that quite creepy,
Because 52, or is it 53,
I don't really know, and i don't really care,
'Coz I'm rapping to a guy with no pubic hair.

Suck on it bitch.


It's true, your caught me, I have no pubic hair
Nor does ya mum, but she has a lovely pair
Now shut ya mouth you dirty manc
Before I have to shank..
....you

Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#19
Quote by weemansyndrome
"I wanna see your bum, I don’t care what you say,
No I don’t have feelings cause feelings are gay.
Something something in the month of May,
Bitches love my penis cause it’s really big."



feelings are gay and so are you
so go suck a dick you ****ing jew
your penis is big yeah right
it's so small cause you are a midget
that every time women see it they run away and ditch it
Last edited by xMeTaL_BmXeRx at Dec 5, 2008,
#20
You poser's are pussy's, your rhymes are too placid,
Thought I come on to burn up your lyrics like battery acid,
Put you in your place, just another booty shaking son,
You're the bitches from New york, and I'm the mother ****ing King Kong,
Not enough skills to pass any exam,
You ****ed my mom, **** I ****ed your whole damn clan,
I pity you folls, cause you ain't lyrically able,
So take your redneck rhymes on back to the stable.
#21
Quote by opc100
Suck on it bitch.

I can't
Because my mouth was horribly disfigured as a child
Something something something
My testes are wild


Got on the bus with me daysavaaaa
#22
Johnny's in the basement
Mixing up the medicine
Im on the pavement
Thinking about the government
The man in the trench coat
Badge out, laid off
Says hes got a bad cough
Wants to get it paid off
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#23
Quote by Payne86
You poser's are pussy's, your rhymes are too placid,
Thought I come on to burn up your lyrics like battery acid,
Put you in your place, just another booty shaking son,
You're the bitches from New york, and I'm the mother ****ing King Kong,
Not enough skills to pass any exam,
You ****ed my mom, **** I ****ed your whole damn clan,
I pity you folls, cause you ain't lyrically able,
So take your redneck rhymes on back to the stable.


How many months did it take you to make that one up?
Here's what the critics are saying about Hanzi_G:

Quote by SteveHouse
Hanzi_G = god damned prophet.

SIG ME GODDAMMIT
#24
Quote by opc100
If that was me, I'd find that quite creepy,
Because 52, or is it 53,
I don't really know, and i don't really care,
'Coz I'm rapping to a guy with no pubic hair.

Suck on it bitch.


Hey you dickhead, stop messing with my best friends,
they'll tie you to a wall and then smack you with their bell-ends,
we'll dress you up all nice and then take you on the town,
dose you up on drugs until you finally go down,

We'll set the bed up pretty and start off slow,
you can ride us like a horsey at a Spanish rodeo,
keep you drinking so you forget all that you did,
but take a load of photos so that we can show your kids.
VENUSIAN
FB SC BC TW
Patterns In The Ivy present ethnicity on an intriguing and dedicated level. ~Ambient Exotica
A mesmeric melange of yearning voice, delicate piano and carefully chosen samples. ~Lost Voices
#25
Quote by Viva-la-mark
It's true, your caught me, I have no pubic hair
Nor does ya mum, but she has a lovely pair
Now shut ya mouth you dirty manc
Before I have to shank..
....you


Omy god dude, that's just not cool,
To comment on my mothers breasts when it's yours that ****ing rule.
And to take the piss out of manchester is a sin worse that masturbation,
I swear, you ****ing do it again and your limbs will need plaster.........cation
hello
#26
Quote by opc100
Omy god dude, that's just not cool,
To comment on my mothers breasts when it's yours that ****ing rule.
And to take the piss out of manchester is a sin worse that masturbation,
I swear, you ****ing do it again and your limbs will need plaster.........cation

I may have little greasy bitch tits
But atleast I can afford a t-shirt that fits
And last I heard you loved my boobs
So shut it or you'll be breathing through tubes
Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#27
Quote by rabidguitarist
Hey you dickhead, stop messing with my best friends,
they'll tie you to a wall and then smack you with their bell-ends,
we'll dress you up all nice and then take you on the town,
dose you up on drugs until you finally go down,

We'll set the bed up pretty and start off slow,
you can ride us like a horsey at a Spanish rodeo,
keep you drinking so you forget all that you did,
but take a load of photos so that we can show your kids.

Why the **** would I take photos,
When I could just look on google and find some pictures of your arse hole,
Oh yes that's right, your the guy off goatse,
It must be a scouse thing, like sucking off a pony.
hello
#28
opc, i saw ur mothers tits
like the teacher in south park where 'er boobies emit
i dont kno if that was proper grammer
but if it was, ohh that was a slammer
wooooooooooooooooooo
UG's condensed package of adrenaline

i am not liable for anything stated above
▼ but he is ▼
#29
Quote by Viva-la-mark
I may have little greasy bitch tits
But atleast I can afford a t-shirt that fits
And last I heard you loved my boobs
So shut it or you'll be breathing through tubes

Dude that's not cool, I actually have a tracce,
I'd send you some pictures, but you'd be like, fappy fappy,
That's the sort of guy you are, you little dirty hoe,
No go and cry in a corner, before i **** on your ****ing nose.
hello
#30
Quote by JohnnyGenzale
Here I am. Your rocket queen oh yeah.

It's actualy Taste good Don't It but yeah they do it during Rocket Queen.
,___,
[O.o]
/)__)
-"--"-

,___,
[¬.¬]
/)__)
-"--"-



Quote by FishCream
Stop Performing Meathook Sodomy On Yourself
#31
Quote by opc100
Dude that's not cool, I actually have a tracce,
I'd send you some pictures, but you'd be like, fappy fappy,
That's the sort of guy you are, you little dirty hoe,
No go and cry in a corner, before i **** on your ****ing nose.

I'm the dirty hoe?! Take a look at your sister
She ****ed me so good she gave me a blister
The stuff you said, that's just twisted
You're to one who gives head to misters!

Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#32
Quote by Viva-la-mark
I'm the dirty hoe?! Take a look at your sister
She ****ed me so good she gave me a blister
The stuff you said, that's just twisted
You're to one who gives head to misters!


Dude, that's not my sister, that's my bro,
So i was right to comment on you being a ****ing hoe,
He might have long hair, but he's growing a beard,
So I'll have to question your tastes in women, 'coz it just seems ****ing weird.
hello
#33
Quote by opc100
Dude that's not cool, I actually have a tracce,
I'd send you some pictures, but you'd be like, fappy fappy,
That's the sort of guy you are, you little dirty hoe,
No go and cry in a corner, before i **** on your ****ing nose.


Well tough luck foo', we don't really care
even if you've got AIDS or are losing hair
Cause we is gangsta's in da hood
and your face is gonna be in mud
But you then got my ho and then got all funky
however I don't care as she's a bit too chunky
But me and my homeys are gonna smash you up
then make you watch a film with a cup
Hull City A.F.C

Quote by Thrashtastic15
crunkym toy diuckl;ess ass ****igkjn ****** **** bitch ass pussy ****er douchecanoe ****** **** you s omn cnt you lieet le biutch
#34
You got index.dat all over yo' pc
Cos Microsofts gone proper anti privacy crayzee
Clearing my history, it don't do jack
Cos use a special pr0gram and it all comes back
Then you can find that i've been looking at pr0n
With Windows XP all your privacy's gone.
Last edited by Craigz0rz at Dec 5, 2008,
#35
Quote by opc100
Dude, that's not my sister, that's my bro,
So i was right to comment on you being a ****ing hoe,
He might have long hair, but he's growing a beard,
So I'll have to question your tastes in women, 'coz it just seems ****ing weird.

A beard would probaly suit your brother
God knows it suits your mother
Speaking of ya mam, I'm her knew lover
You should see what we get up to under the covers
Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!
#36
gee I wonder why people stereotype rap

I'm gonna go fap
Quote by Carmel
You are a redeeming feature for the UG Swedish population.


All-riiight.
#37
Quote by Viva-la-mark
A beard would probaly suit your brother
God knows it suits your mother
Speaking of ya mam, I'm her knew lover
You should see what we get up to under the covers


Nic nac paddywack, give the dog a bone,
she's tied up on a leash and she's trying to get home,
I thought I was her lover, I must have been mistaken,
but with me it's for real, and with you she's just fakin'.
VENUSIAN
FB SC BC TW
Patterns In The Ivy present ethnicity on an intriguing and dedicated level. ~Ambient Exotica
A mesmeric melange of yearning voice, delicate piano and carefully chosen samples. ~Lost Voices
#38
Your mother is a hoe
I paid her for sex
Xbox Live tag: Dream Away Rain
Add!

Quote by marko'd
dont sweat how quick your progressing, i heard that Jimi hendrix didnt get his legendary guitar skills until he was dead


Quote by Dreadnought
+ MOTHERFUCKIN' 1
#39
You niggas is like pins
Set em up Knock em down **** I keep bowlin
Niggas know one thing I got the slab holdin
a 4 in the 20 yeh promethazine got me folded.
#40
Quote by rabidguitarist
Nic nac paddywack, give the dog a bone,
she's tied up on a leash and she's trying to get home,
I thought I was her lover, I must have been mistaken,
but with me it's for real, and with you she's just fakin'.

Oh, you wanna do it wi' nursery ryhmes?
Well that suits me just fine

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall
Watching your mother suckin' ma balls
As for his mum, when you're givin it your all
It's still my name that she screams and she calls
Quote by KileManA7X
You sir, are an honorary genius! Take this badge, you made us proud!