#1
Bleed, let it drip into my hands
fill the cup to redeem

Feed, devour all my flesh
Attemp to make me clean

Lies, bring on these lies
drenched in deciet, hidden by my eyes

Prise, rip my heart from my hands
rip it in two, i start again

I want to bleed again
i want to breathe again
blame me the sleeper, the dreamer
blame me the saint and the sinner

Faith bleeds out from my pores
sought and found another lost cause
blame me for all i have done
the begining of the end has begun
#2
its good i dont know your musical preferences but it seems very emoish
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#3
Eh, it's quite basic. It's very restricted by the rhyming you've employed, and it really doesn't hold much depth. It feels too "generic" in the way I've heard this a hundred times before, and it doesn't really make me want to come back for more. I'm sure it suits the needs of the song (I'm assuming it's a song here), but in terms of writing quality, it is need of a lot of revision before I could pull something meaningful out of it.
#4
Quote by Futile
Bleed, let it drip into my hands
fill the cup to redeem

Redeem what?

Feed, devour all my flesh
Attemp to make me clean

Attemp(t). Sorry, misspelled words are unattractive.

Lies, bring on these lies
drenched in deciet, hidden by my eyes

Don't repeat lies. It's not necessary and sounds lame.

Prise, rip my heart from my hands
rip it in two, i start again

Up until now... it's just... meh. Bland. More unneccesary repetition. Prise?

I want to bleed again
i want to breathe again
blame me the sleeper, the dreamer
blame me the saint and the sinner

Faith bleeds out from my pores
sought and found another lost cause
blame me for all i have done
the begining of the end has begun


Dunno mate. Someone before me said it was basic... I agree. Have a nice day.
#5
Extremely emo and incredibly rudimentary. However, if you've got a solid-as-**** melody behind it, kids listening to top 40 **** radio don't give a crap about lyrical content. So hey! Score.