#1
Hey this is one of those three part songs that all flow in to one another.

Time-bomb/Sweet nothing (Bottom Feeder)
Where are those staples that adhere to my brain?
When I look back on those games that I lost in the rain

Would you kill me, if I over came?

Cause it seems that as of late I just think to goddamn hard
And after twenty million mile on this one-mile road I wont have got to far

What would you do, if I stayed the same?

You wrote me a letter that said
“I liked you better when you heard everything I said”
I hoped one day you would sing for me again
Like we did when you were three
We’d have thoughtful conversation about how
Nothings as good as good as it used to be
When we were children we had such beautiful taste in ****
When will this time bomb in the room cease to exist?

Well I eat my food to goddamn fast I am such a freak
And when they go to bury me my coffins gonna creak

Would you hate me if I sheltered you?

You always have the answers it seems cause I never shout
A motion to manipulate my words when I step out

I’ll use your fear against you to find truth

You wrote me a letter that said
“I liked you better when you heard everything I said”
I hoped one day you would sing for me again
Like we did when you were three
We’d have thoughtful conversation about how
Nothings as good as good as it used to be
When we were children we had such beautiful taste in ****
When will this time bomb in the room cease to exist?

So much tension in the homestead
Before the breadwinner goes to bed
And I lie awake all night wondering how I’ll do
I really hope this time explodes soon


You wrote me a letter that said
“I liked you better when you heard everything I said”
I hoped one day you would sing for me again
Like we did when you were three
We’d have thoughtful conversation about how
Nothings as good as good as it used to be
When we were children we had such beautiful taste in ****
When will this time bomb in the room cease to exist?
Lately I’ve lost
All my will to survive
And all my tragic memories
Never really came

I need something to hold on for me
Someone to watch me rust
If everyone would die for my sins
That would build my trust

Disown me
Destroy me
Become my everything

You know I love you (well)
I love to hate you
You are my sweet nothing

These are the things I think about
When I’m given to much time to think
Trade in these metaphors I will objectify
This acid rain puddle in my kitchen sink

We’re gonna get drunk on pyramid schemes
We’ll tell each other what the other did was wrong
We’ll feel much closer on these full plates
Where will I go when you are gone?

Disown me
Destroy me
Become my everything

You know I love you (well)
I love to hate you
You are my sweet nothing


You’re gonna learn psychology
You’re gonna work the market see
You’re gonna do what’s best for me
I’ll always be a bottom feeder

I’ll keep up my dirty deeds
While you convert astronomy
Into singularity
I’m a ****ing bottom feeder

I’ll practice my vagrancy
And with your virtuosity
You will live under the sea
I’ll still be the bottom feeder

You look on disapprovingly
But I’m gonna do what’s best for me
**** your life of sterility
I’m so glad to be a bottom feeder
MY BANDS

Phat Toosday and the Astro-Bus
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/ptabmusic

Lets All Get Superpowers
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/lags

Hobstolopho
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/hobstolopho

Come Visit Today!!!
#2
Typo maybe? Twenty million mile(s?). Also, this line doesnt seem to flow very well, but maybe I'm just reading it wrong.

For your "wrote me a letter" choruses, the idea of writing letters is very cliche. If you want to keep that concept in there, I think you should reword it, like "sent me a postcard" or "shipped me a package" or "sent your thoughts in an envelope" or something. Writing letters is too common.

"I need something to hold on for me
Someone to watch me rust"

Is this about a person or object? You contradict yourself with "something" and "someone", so pick one and go with it. I think "someone" makes more sense. If you use "something", I think you should say "something to make me rust" instead.

Other than the fact that I can't understand the flow (only because all have is words on a computer screen), I like it. Could you do mine? Its "Right Through the Sliding Doors" in my sig, but doing any of them would be nice too! If you want you can do all three...
#3
oh thats wierd. i just noticed the something/someone problem. they should both be someone actually. also the style is kinda of a fast bluegrass influenced folk punk song. so some lines are sung very fast.
MY BANDS

Phat Toosday and the Astro-Bus
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/ptabmusic

Lets All Get Superpowers
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/lags

Hobstolopho
artists.ultimate-guitar.com/hobstolopho

Come Visit Today!!!