#1
More of a poem than an actual song perhaps?

The Unrequited

I look at your face,
And I see the lack of anything
That I might like to see.
We had something once,
A brief fire-
That no amount of fuel could keep burning.
We blazed hard and fast,
Too much so.
And the fire in me still rages
But now it hurts me; when it used to warm my soul.
As much as I could tell you,
There is no point; I don’t have the skill to start an inferno in your heart
I could pour kerosene down your throat;
Throw in a match;
Watch the soul of you die like an ant under the focused light of my guilt.
And that’s not what I want.
I want what I can’t have;
My aspirations were always bigger than what I could achieve.
Always.
You should know that.
And secretly, I think you do;
And it’s something you’d give anything to forget.
All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself



Quote by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
Last edited by ChemicalFire at Dec 11, 2008,
#2
"And the fire in me still burns
But now it burns me;"

Repetition much?

EDIT: Good call on that, but now re-reading (I'm at home now) you've got the word burn(ing/ed/s) three times in four lines.

That no amount of fuel could keep burning.
We burned hard and fast,
Too much so.
And the fire in me still burns
Last edited by ginjaninja at Dec 11, 2008,
#3
Quote by ginjaninja
"And the fire in me still burns
But now it burns me;"

Repetition much?


Hey it used to be worse lol, I had the wire fire like 5 times in 3 lines But I'll see what I can do about that

Quote by ginjaninja

That no amount of fuel could keep burning.
We burned hard and fast,
Too much so.
And the fire in me still burns


Good call there, I've fixed that too
All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself



Quote by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
Last edited by ChemicalFire at Dec 11, 2008,