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#2
Title got me.

Edit:

(God gave her to me after I stopped masturbating)


I'm gonna have to try this.
RULE BRITANNIA
#4
After I stopped masturbation, God gave me a gf, who I can't have sex with or stare at her tits without fear of eternal damnation.

Quite what is the point of having a gf then?
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RED MILITIA FACTION
#5
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Title got me.

Edit:


I'm gonna have to try this.


Yeah, I'm calling shenanigan on that one.
I <3 bangoodcharlotte

Quote by humperdunk
one time i let my cat has cheezburger. i thought it was pretty funny.
#6
What the author looks like:



haha
The will be heartache,
there will be rain,
and joy I can't explain.
Last edited by titsmcgee852 at Dec 12, 2008,
#8
forget it people, we're all going to hell. sex and masturbation are the works of the devil. god doesnt want us to desire each other, only him.

hell he's like the biggest jealous girlfriend ever
#10
Quote by Trickycindy
After I stopped masturbation, God gave me a gf, who I can't have sex with or stare at her tits without fear of eternal damnation.

Quite what is the point of having a gf then?

Free cook?
#12
Quote by CoreysMonster
forget it people, we're all going to hell. sex and masturbation are the works of the devil. god doesnt want us to desire each other, only him.

hell he's like the biggest jealous girlfriend ever



Yeah but God won't touch my penis. So it's like, what choice do I have but to turn to women?
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."-Duke
#13
Quote by CoreysMonster
forget it people, we're all going to hell. sex and masturbation are the works of the devil. god doesnt want us to desire each other, only him.

hell he's like the biggest jealous girlfriend ever


So true, so true.

And I'm pretty sure that woman is a hippocrite. Like she can really say she's never checked someone out.
XIAOXI
#15
Quote by Abunai X
So true, so true.

And I'm pretty sure that woman is a hippocrite. Like she can really say she's never checked someone out.



Maybe not, but I'm guessing men have no problem controlling their urges around her.


Hi-oh!
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."-Duke
#17
Quote by mrcrono


Does anyone have a Master Ball? I get the feeling this one is going to be tough to capture.


She's so smug

Jesus, that's a good read.
#20
I raged so badly at that site. I fucking hate christian fundamentalists.

I would write up some 4 page rant but I won't, I realise where I am.

Here's the jist of what I would write:
Some gray haired bitchy menopausal virgin does NOT know the will of god.

Carnality is nothing to be ashamed of.

If you believe god exists (and lives), you believe god controls the world in the greater good. Use this and take a guess why boobs are so attractive to us.

FUCK

EDIT: and this should go into the religion thread
#22
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Title got me.

Edit:


I'm gonna have to try this.


That was hilarious.

Who would've thought that masturbation is humanity's Achilles heal?
This is why I don't like arguing on the internet.
Quote by damian_91
If only you could back that statement up.
Quote by Zombee
Wolfgang's Philadelphia Study. Look it up yourself.
Quote by damian_91
No need to, absurd generalizations aren't my thing.
#23
Quote by mrcrono


Does anyone have a Master Ball? I get the feeling this one is going to be tough to capture.


OH MY GOD

I just pissed myself.
Catch me,
heal me,
Lift me back up to the Sun
I choose to live
#25
Quote by mrcrono
Dude read some of the other questions on there. Many lulz to be had.

I posted that pic first!
The will be heartache,
there will be rain,
and joy I can't explain.
#28
am i the only one who cracked up at "PROBE ministries"?

and yea, that ugly b1tch is pretty safe from having anyone thinking about her sexually, except maybe as a turnoff or in a cold cold shower. That guy was hilarious, we're nothing more than evolved animals, we have our desires that's kind of the key to the survival of a species.

I can't believe how ignorant some people are...seriously, grow up.
Hi I'm
Mr. JimBo R. Insane
#29
Typical christain fundamentalist.

I always live in hope that they are a minority....
Sat in a lab, curing diseases. They actually LET me play with chemicals!
#31
lol silly christians and their obsessions with virginity. The author looks like she's racked up a few guys in her time.
#35
Quote by Abunai X
So true, so true.

And I'm pretty sure that woman is a hippocrite. Like she can really say she's never checked someone out.


Someone who is addicted to heroin can tell someone else to give up, and it doesn't make them a hypocrite- it just means they have been through something and recognise that it isn't the right thing to do.
VENUSIAN
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Patterns In The Ivy present ethnicity on an intriguing and dedicated level. ~Ambient Exotica
A mesmeric melange of yearning voice, delicate piano and carefully chosen samples. ~Lost Voices
#36
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Title got me.

Edit:


I'm gonna have to try this.


how many pit monkeys are gonna try this


ima try it
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#37
Quote by mrjimborinsane
am i the only one who cracked up at "PROBE ministries"?



I laughed my ass off at that one. No sex, but we're gonna name ourselves after an innuendo, you know, just to show we're "down with the kids"

And what a silly choice. I know what I would do. Either:

A) Do everything that you think your version of God, who you cannot see or directly communicate with, wants you to do, and yet still wonder if you are doing the right thing


OR

B) Look at your girlfriends boobs that are both real, attractive, fun, and so goddamned awesome.

I wonder....
#38
Quote by pawnshopguitars
I laughed my ass off at that one. No sex, but we're gonna name ourselves after an innuendo, you know, just to show we're "down with the kids"

And what a silly choice. I know what I would do. Either:

A) Do everything that you think your version of God, who you cannot see or directly communicate with, wants you to do, and yet still wonder if you are doing the right thing


OR

B) Look at your girlfriends boobs that are both real, attractive, fun, and so goddamned awesome.

I wonder....

First one sounds good to me.
RULE BRITANNIA
#39
rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl

"most couple at the age of 17 dont get married, chances are you'll be looking down the breasts of another mans future wife"

YOU*RE GOING STRAIGHT TA HELLA!


gotta love religion. Great source for entertainment in these cold boring days.
RIP Bernie Mac
RIP Michael Jackson

FUCK YOU DIME!

Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Get 'Cliff is Angry. So so angry' on your ass.

Edit: Then take pictures and send me them.



Genetically engineered and raised by wolverines DAVE MUSTAINE...
#40
breasts are beautiful, they nurture the children of our futures.

and make fantastic motorboat noises.
Grammar and spelling omitted as an exercise for the reader.
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