#1
Well I havent posted here in ages and I wrote a new song tonight.

I plan on playing it back at my home town at a coffee shop I used to play at.

This song is about all the changes I went through when I left the small city and went into the large city.


Notes that I wrote.

Intro

When I was young,
I wrote this song.
I played the notes that I heard but I never wrote any words.

Now that Im grown
Now that I know.
All along the words were werent lost but set in stone.

Verse 1

Is it any wonder.
That now Im afraid.
Went from having fun to trying to runaway.

I used to have friends
Always by my side.
Now I walk alone and always try to hide

Chorus

When I am lost
Dont know where to go.
I just look back on these notes that I wrote.

When I feel sad
and left all alone.
I just look back on these notes that I wrote.

Ive been saved by all these notes that I wrote.

verse 2

Taken with time.
Things had to change.
I am now a better man but sacrafice has been made.

Gave up the drugs.
Gave up the fights.
Gave up the wrong but at the same time lost the right.

There will always be that part missing in my life.

Chorus

When I am lost
Dont know where to go.
I just look back on these notes that I wrote.

When I feel sad
and left all alone.
I just look back on these notes that I wrote.

Ive been saved by all these notes that I wrote.
#2
I recommend putting a line break in at each last line of a stanza.


Also, it was all a bit dull, no metaphors, similes, any other devices... Each idea was kind of SET on it's own, you didn't explain anything more than bare minimum.

Sorry, didn't enjoy it.
#3
Deep song .
I like the lyrics.
Last edited by Ic3 at Dec 14, 2008,
#4
"Gave up the wrong but at the same time lost the right."

Best line in the song by far, love that.