#1
This is my newest freshly completed as of 5 minutes ago. Again, this one is long, clocking in at 9:28, so it is only for those with long attention spans/no social life. This is far from my best piece, as some of the transition sare shaky and some of the riffs feel kind of irrelevant, but I'm also a terrible judge of my own work.

I'm done talking, enjoy the song.

I will gladly return any crits. Cheers.
Attachments:
Lobster Santa.zip
#2
I like it. I would change up some of the drum beats though. the fills are good but the main rythyms are crap.
#3
Wow... very impressive. It flowed pretty well, and I detected all kinds of influences.

If you want me to write out a really detailed review of it, just pm me, but it was a long song (I have no social life ) and I can do a bar by bar analysis, no problem, but I would need time. For now, I will just leave with giving you a solid 9.5/10.

Yeah, I realize it's a crap reveiw, but If you want to crit mine, go ahead.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1032411
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Please check out my Youtube, and friend me if you like it. I do C4C, and I gladly will crit anything if you ask me.


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#4
WOW. i seriously may have just dozed off and forgot this was written by onebetter. cause seriously for a while i thought i was listening to protest the hero. **** dude. i definitely heard good influences from them, and i heard some opeth too. nono. all the transitions are fine. quite good actually. if you record this song... dayum. i would buy it. maybe even more than one copy. this is honestly good. really good. better than most of what ive seen on ug. anyway the transitions are perfect. dont worry about those. the riffs are not irrelevant either. it sounds like a good complete song. and yes i listened to the whole song. there is almost nothing to change.. i absolutely love bars 132-148. great chord progression. also, the intro/main riff (bar 17) isnt great, but im feeling its one of those riffs that is original, and grows on me over time and soon enough im in love with it. honestly sir, throughout the whole song, there is nothing wrong. somehow you are a god?... or something.. i dunno. i like the constant change in the drums and they always fit well. some parts of the song on guitar are weird... but weird in a good way. like protest the hero weird. you know what i mean? anyway, dont be harsh on yourself. amazing song. please, go make a band. and im sorry i didnt give you anything to improve on... its too good. really. 9.8/10
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1021053

edit: there is one thing.... i dont remember what bar it is, but where you have constant sixteenth notes on guitar. i think it would sound better if you did triplet eighths.
Last edited by jamesdtsx at Dec 28, 2008,
#5
Wow, this is one great piece! I like everything up until 125, and that's where it gets great! I absolutely love that riff! I don't really understand the point of just having one guitar from 133 - 153... Then everything's great until 231, I didn't like that part, it sounded too 'pirate-y' to me and It just felt wrong. At 253 it gets better again! I liked the little lead thing thrown in between the riffs. 283 and on are great, a nice break from all the heaviness and it felt in place! The part starting at 296 is amazing, great job. I also love how you slowly build up after the acoustic part to end up at 325, the beginning riff. Great transition there!
So overall, it's great, but lose the pirate part! It also could use more leads and solos, but I think you were planning on that, hence the single guitar sections...
9,5\10 great job!

crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1028534