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#1
...I think I should finally let someone know about how I ended up to be like this, not talking to anyone and ambitionless. When I was in preschool I was verbally teased for having weirdly protruding *insert body part on face* (It could be potentially descriptive thus blowing my real life online)(yes I am that ugly) and so my relationship with the other children was well strained...and of course by the nature of the self-fulfilling prophecy it just dragged me down deeper and deeper and by the time I was in elementary I had no friends.

sometimes I don't understand. Srsly. **** children. Well not really, but they're just so shallow at times, really good and sweet when treated nicely, and rude when presented with something undesirable. I really don't udnerstand how someone can laugh and enjoy themselves when someone is crying their ****ing face off i nfront og them.. I suppose I would've done the same thing towards them. Or that's just how I think it to be just to spite them.
so anyway thanks to those few slightly often several incidents i became fearfu

I'm sure all of us then had some fears when we started out young, but I supposed. So i'd have to work harder to gain confidence and assuage those fears, and that would've benn be really hard for a 6 year old then. So I supposed it was inevitable then.
I know I shouldn't dwell on the past...but it's the only place I can put blame on it.

It didn't bother me as much as it was supposed to, thanks to a naturally short memory and a short term pleasure system based on "right now" without any consideration for the future. I even playfully and honestly considered the normal childhoof fantasies of "living forever" and having a big mansion with things in it, but now I just want to have a lifespan, thank you, or even less than that.

Thanks to a good helping of emotional abuse over a period of 6 years whenver I go talk to someone I get fearful and nervous.

It did never tip me over the edge at that time.
sometimes I wish it did, beceause then my actions would have converyed to the proper people what I had kep within me for a long time and they could have helped me, but it nveref did, thanks to the resons above. I get really embarrassed when I try to acknkwledge this problem of mine. Which I still do, which is preventing me from getting any form of face-to-face help.

I don't think this is really the reason why i'm like thsi now. It's so long ago..and such a minor incident.

Or I could be that I'm an idiot, and any other person with an overcoming persistant will would have gotten past that. it seems such a little childgood scuffle/fight/thing now, so what am i really grousing over?

I think i have an issue with my looks now...it doesn't REALLy bother me, but I just try not to think about it.

--------

My parents say that in a year...well I should try to talk to people more. I still haven't told them, except for what they observe in me. They said that I should be doing this within a year/next year...maybe it wasn't serious and just a "new year resolution" discussion, but if they;r right(for my own good, becausse im soon to be growing up) then i'm screwed.

and it's not that i'm doing to for them...it's just that I'm way behind on almost everyone in the same age group regarding academics/life skills.

I've considered going to see a counselour at school, but i'm not comfortable doing that...I know I should, and it can really help me, but i'm. I know that it probably won't be so, and that they're usually understanding and are used to dealing with a whole range of issues, but i'm too comfortable with keeping things to myself, i'm not sure how to "let go" and go past the first step. I think I may have social anxiety.


I apologize for the bad typing, and anyone who may come to read this.
Quote by icaneatcatfood
On second thought, **** tuning forks. You best be carrying around a grand piano that was tuned by an Italian
#4
Listen


It's super late and I'm seriously about to go to McDonald's


You wanna Happy Meal or somethin?
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#5
Kids are kids. It's not like they can think to themselves "Okay, as a six year old what will be the effects of my actions against this other human". It happens a lot. It happened to me. It happened every year until the 9th grade. Well, halfway through I mean.

As for the social anxiety and wanting to let out but not being able to... again, I've been in that situation. As difficult as it can seem, just do it. You are already aware of the effects this has had/is having/will have on you. What will you lose by trying?
When you saw me sleeping
thought I was dreaming
of you...


I didn't tell you
That the only dream
Is Valium for me
#7
Ever considered antidepressants? I would never suggest them as a permanent solution, but in my experience, they're pretty good at making you feel good enough about yourself to consider actually getting help for your problems. I.e. they're good as a temporary pick-me-up in order to motivate yourself to tackle the big issues.
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#8
Wall of text is evil and a wall of text

EDIT: After reading that, i'm sorry ts.
But honestly, we've all suffered emotional abuse from other kids.
Last edited by =w=eeze at Jan 3, 2009,
#9
You man are the ****ing coolest guy I know

Seriously, if you have social anxiety, I want to help you!

I need to go to bed because I have to wake up early, but you came here for help. I''m going to stay up if you want me to help you
And we will weave in and out of sanity unnoticed
Swirling in blissfully restless visions of all our bleary progress
Glowing in radiant madness
#10
Living in society is all about dealing with people who you don't like and/or who don't like you. The sooner you learn to do that with as little impact on your nerves as possible, the better.


Also, would you like some cheese with your whine?
#11
are you trolling the Pit trying to get "go away, emo boy" replies or did you actually think you'd start a conversation here?

dude, this is diary/blog material, not a convo.
Meadows
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I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
#12
Quote by GNiCk89
Listen


It's super late and I'm seriously about to go to McDonald's


You wanna Happy Meal or somethin?

Oh get me a cinnamon bun?
#14
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
dude, this is diary/blog material, not a convo.

This.

Sounds to me TS, you need to see a therapist.
If Rock is a life-style, then Metal's an addiction

Yelloooow!


Of The


UG Challenge

#15
Meh, I went through a large amount of psychological torment in elementary school, I can get thrown into fits of depression quite easily, but always find that guitar or sports help me out. I don't really know what the point of your thread was if it is a "How do I get confidence to talk to more people" thread, find other musicians and talk about music or other people that share your interests.
I dont really know where else this thread could go, or maybe it was a "I need to talk to someone and The Pit will make fun of me, but screw it, I won't even meet them" threads, in which case, read the previous paragraph
#17
plz don't use ugh for a title to draw us in and then barrage us with words

anyways answer is rape or fap one is lonely but the other is a very special relationship decifer which one is which.
#18
i think you probably talk about weird stuff that people dont want to know like you just did then, try and lighten up then someone might want to be your friend
#19
Quote by GNiCk89
Listen


It's super late and I'm seriously about to go to McDonald's


You wanna Happy Meal or somethin?

You're an asshole, but you made me laugh.

*hugs* to TS.
I sued Delta Airlines, 'cause they sold me a ticket to New Jersey, I went there, and it SUCKED.
#20
I just sent you a message; I'd like it if you responded as soon as you can
When you saw me sleeping
thought I was dreaming
of you...


I didn't tell you
That the only dream
Is Valium for me
#21
Quote by dethead666
plz don't use ugh for a title to draw us in and then barrage us with words

anyways answer is rape or fap one is lonely but the other is a very special relationship decifer which one is which.


go back to /b/.
#22
you just need to grow some balls and learn to take **** and dish it back. some kid makes fun of your ****ed up face? their mom has a penis and sucks dick for money when she doesn't have enough money to pay her heroin dealer. comon, man.
#23
You brought up self-fulfilling prophecies. You're the way you are because that's how you perceive yourself.

If you believe that, then you're a few conscious changes away from being who you want to be.

You're only as unhappy as you let yourself become.
I've decided that my signature is terrible. I'm open to suggestions.


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# Un-nominated in UG Top 100,
#24
Seriously man, it's now or later haha. I want to help you, but if you don't reply I have no choice but to pass the **** out.

I used to be a loser, I used to be scared of people, I realized I needed changed and that people would love me for who I am and those who were negative towards me weren't looking out for my best interest.

Life is too short. Man you could me a girl who you think is the greatest girl in the world.
And we will weave in and out of sanity unnoticed
Swirling in blissfully restless visions of all our bleary progress
Glowing in radiant madness
#25
Quote by assparade69
you just need to grow some balls and learn to take **** and dish it back. some kid makes fun of your ****ed up face? their mom has a penis and sucks dick for money when she doesn't have enough money to pay her heroin dealer. comon, man.

I'd like to hear how stories of you doing this have turned out. Especially if there's five people doing this to you right in front of you, and you have no friends. Also, lets just say the people have been known to get physical with people they don't like.

Shut the hell up.
When you saw me sleeping
thought I was dreaming
of you...


I didn't tell you
That the only dream
Is Valium for me
#28
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
are you trolling the Pit trying to get "go away, emo boy" replies or did you actually think you'd start a conversation here?

dude, this is diary/blog material, not a convo.


Now I understand why people don't like you...

While you're sort of right, you really don't need to be a dick to the poor kid. Have some compassion for humans rather than the UG rules, ok?
To me:
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In fact, I almost ALWAYS agree with YourDad.

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One of the best replies ever.

In the same thread

Do you love Arsis?
#29
Quote by GNiCk89
Listen


It's super late and I'm seriously about to go to McDonald's


You wanna Happy Meal or somethin?


Lol. No thanks, I hate fast food.


Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
are you trolling the Pit trying to get "go away, emo boy" replies or did you actually think you'd start a conversation here?

dude, this is diary/blog material, not a convo.


If I wanted to start a conversation i'd say, "Hey, what's up? Have you seen <insert name of movie>" which I do sometimes. I can't do that all the time.

and are you commenting like that just for the hell of it just to get, "fuck off" replies? Think about it.


sorry for the apparent rudeness and arrogance that i've displayed for starting this thread, but i'm afraid i'm starting to lose it.


TDKshorty, thanks for the kind offer :]
Quote by icaneatcatfood
On second thought, **** tuning forks. You best be carrying around a grand piano that was tuned by an Italian
#30
Quote by Td_Nights
I'd like to hear how stories of you doing this have turned out. Especially if there's five people doing this to you right in front of you, and you have no friends. Also, lets just say the people have been known to get physical with people they don't like.

Shut the hell up.


Exactly what I was going to say. I was in a similar situation, you need to find something that you are good at (sports, music, whatever really) and find people with similar interests. Joining a club or a sports team is always a good plan. If you really honestly can't just go up to people and talk to them, try MSN or some other online messenger. It sounds stupid, but it forces people to look past your appearance and get to know YOU, I've made a lot of friends that way. Hope I've helped, or if not, I'll keep at it.
bands/artists I've seen: Protest the Hero, LIGHTS, Andrew Bird, Flight of the Conchords, Incubus, Nine Inch Nails, Between the Buried and Me, Guthrie Govan, Cynic, The Devin Townsend Project, Scale the Summit, The Dillinger Escape Plan, Darkest Hour
#31
Well, I'm not going to type out my life story, but the person I could have been was very much destroyed by my peers and my mother in my childhood and in my early teenage years. In fact, I didn't even get a shot at being a normal teenager until I was in 11th grade, but then I ended up falling in with the wrong crowd.
I snapped out of all of my depression and crap towards the end of my senior year. You have to realize that you can't let the things that have hurt you in the past hold you back. If you let your life pass you by, you're only letting those people in your past hurt you even more.
#32
You think you're more ugly than you are, anyway from what I've seen, people don't care about looks as you get past your teens. I'm the same age as you and many people still act as kids, but I think it's going to get better in the years to come.

Why would you let your whole life run away from you just because kids called you ugly? That's ridiculous. Just suck it in, and do what you want to do. I've learnt that getting into a depressed state and crawling up feeling sorry for yourself won't do anything... So go out there, be confident, do what you like doing, and don't worry about not having any ambitions at 15. Look at yourself positively instead of just saying "oh I'm ugly." That ain't gonna do anything for you. It's hard, but you've gotta muscle through thinking that you're ugly and just think positively about yourself. I bet there are plenty of people who care about you, and if you just put your looks behind you and talk to people and make friends, you'd be liked and loved by heaps of people.

You can do it mate.
My Gear...
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Quote by Ajax413
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#33
I really don't udnerstand how someone can laugh and enjoy themselves when someone is crying their ****ing face off i nfront og them.. I suppose I would've done the same thing towards them.


I stopped reading after this line.
“You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.” -Winston Churchill
#34
Thanks for all the helpful/non helpful idiotic replies everyone, but I have to leave now...some family stuff.
Quote by icaneatcatfood
On second thought, **** tuning forks. You best be carrying around a grand piano that was tuned by an Italian
#35
Quote by Laces Out Danny
Thanks for all the helpful/non helpful idiotic replies everyone, but I have to leave now...some family stuff.

Bye.
If Rock is a life-style, then Metal's an addiction

Yelloooow!


Of The


UG Challenge

#36
Every morning I wake up and I look at myself and I say "god damn you are good looking" and I feel great, I feel good about myself. I begin to believe I'm good looking and then others do too, because after all I am.

It's all a mental state. You were abused as a child, by other children. Children can be mean, but they honestly don't know the true nature of their selves.

But you were really effected by what happened, so you understand this better than other people.

There are so many things I could say but you just have to stop caring. It'll be hard, but great things don't come easy.
This is your life challenge, you don't want to look back and think, "Man, I wasted many years in my life because I was scared of being hurt and rejected"

You know how you might be scared to ride a ride or do something new, but once you do it you're like "Wow, why was I scared? that was FUN!", life is a lot like that.

You said you've tried to meet people and I want to ask you what happened? Chances are something either mediocre happened or something great happened. Great things happen all the time, you just have to be open, you have to be willing to lose.

A man that keeps on to what little he has will not gain anything and will stay in his little narcissistic hole forever. You have to be willing to change, to let go of everything, to place no importance on anything.
If you give away things and you let go of things you'll see better things return to you ten fold

I feel like this isn't my best speech, but I haven't tried to motivate anyone for a while, so bare with me.

All I can tell you is those people were negative they made you feel the way you do. Do you honestly care for them? You're letting them control you and it's not good, don't let them control you. Be above them, be yourself. There are peopl that love you, I don't know if you have friends, but you family loves you and they honestly dont have to, but they do, because there is something great about you.

There are a billion people in the world and you could affect them and have a postive effect on them, you're that important to the world, so stop all this. Go out, talk to people. What's the worst that will happen?

The worst that will happen is you'll meet someone who won't like you, who will be into things totally different that you're into and isn't a good person and has no interest in your well being. THEY HAVE ON INTEREST IN WHETHER YOU FEEL GOOD OR NOT! **** THEM MAN!

The worst thing that can happen is you'll meet people and at worst have a mediocre time
WHATS WRONG WITH A MEDIOCRE TIME? thats the worst that can happen! you'll meet new people and you might not get a girlfriend or end up on a journey like Harold and Kumar, but maybe you'll have learned something new or seen a new movie or found a ne friend to play Xbox live with!

doesn't that sound awesome?!

I feel like i'm not much help because I haven't realy kept up with how to over come social anxiety

You need to look up people like Niel Strauss, Mysterey, Ross Jefferis, a book called "The Game"

go pick it up, don't read into it about picking up chicks but about being yourself.

anyone who doesn't love the real you can go **** themselves man

if you have any questions or specifics thins hit me up

I might not check until tomorrow night but I will check back!

Itook the time to try and help you , you're worth everyones time man, people out there love you. I'm a total stranger and to me you're a star. Everyone's a star, you just have to realize it!
And we will weave in and out of sanity unnoticed
Swirling in blissfully restless visions of all our bleary progress
Glowing in radiant madness
#37
Everything TDK said is the truth. Take me, for example. I used to hate myself. I used to hate everything about me. Despite hating myself in every way, shape, and form I began making jokes about how awesome I am. People started to gravitate towards me because of the comments I'd make about myself. Eventually I had friends and I had quite a few acquaintances that I talked to in class on a daily basis. When you surround yourself with people that like you, you realize that there's really nothing wrong with you.
Just by making a few dumb jokes about someone I hated more than anyone else in the world (myself), I indirectly led myself to gain a significant amount of confidence and self-esteem.
#38
It might seem difficult but you should see a counselor. It's not going to get better by itself. Good luck. You have nothing to loose.
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#39
If your old enough or if you don't already have one, i suggest getting a part time job or full time job (sorry, i don't know how old you are). Especially in the service sector. This will help you with your shyness faster then anything else and you will meet new people, maybe make some friends. In a work environment you will be more confident because no one there previously knows you and you will be forced to talk to people as you work with them.
Gear:
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#40
Quote by Td_Nights
Kids are kids. It's not like they can think to themselves "Okay, as a six year old what will be the effects of my actions against this other human". It happens a lot. It happened to me. It happened every year until the 9th grade. Well, halfway through I mean.

As for the social anxiety and wanting to let out but not being able to... again, I've been in that situation. As difficult as it can seem, just do it. You are already aware of the effects this has had/is having/will have on you. What will you lose by trying?


This is pretty sound advice. Also TS - is your name an Ace Venture reference?
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