#1
All that’s seen are these flames
This wall of fire surrounds this place
World plunged into chaos
A thousand bullets gone astray

[Chorus]
Let it burn
‘Cause everything burns
Let it burn
‘Cause everything… burns

Lives set ablaze
A war fuelled by rage
Broken bones and broken lives
Young men saying their last goodbyes

[Chorus]

Sounds of fighting long gone
The suffering here still lingers on
Scars pass in time
Pain refuses to subside

[Chorus]

[Chorus]
Ball Custom Mark I

Korg Pitchblack > Dunlop Crybaby wah > mODDball audio Green Bastard > Marshall GV2 Guv'nor Plus > EHX Holy Stain > MXR Phase 90 > MXR Carbon Copy

Jet City JCA20h
Epiphone Valve Jr.
Blackstar HTV212
#2
A little simple when seeing it on paper, but If you have a great riff it could be a song.
I just think that 14 lines is not enough to be called a song. That's Just Me. I do like what your trying to say, but it just seems too simple. For such an easy concept, you really have to step it up and write something heart felt, that no one but you could think of. The actual lyrics seem pretty generic and I feel like you could have tried to use a more complex vocal rhythm and rhyming pattern. But, It's not that bad, you might have something there. I think if you set back down and revised it a little, It would be better. I would like to see this after a few more hours of work.

I'm not trying to be harsh, I'm just being honest.
#3
All that’s seen are these flames
This wall of fire surrounds this place

Didn't like "these flames". Drop "these", and reword that line.
The repetition of "this" in the second line is annoying too.



Other than that, a solid, tight little piece. You should be proud of the half rhymes and such you used at the end of each line. Despite that, it is boring and generic. It would be impossible to elaborate on anything here without ruining the tone, so extending it really isn't an option. The only thing I can think of is getting a new chorus.