#1
i remember the green moss
planted sideways on garish
wood panels, i remember her
so much those days. Allison's
face reminds me of how
much ofg god really exists.

sitting;drunk;alone;
so far away formm the girl
i love.

she's scared. afraid of
never having children.
or
never getting my love.
i wish i could
hold her face so gently
in my palm, lke a blueberry
and squeeze the blues right
out of her.

please don't tell her this
but i've been with
somany other women since
saying 'i love you'

if she ever knew
it would crush her heart
i could do everything bad in the world
to her
but the worst
is to let her know.,

im so sorry.
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#2
this shook me. powerful writing. even the drunken typos heightened the emotion of this piece. very, very intense.
#3
Yeah, it's actually pretty touching, despite the drunkenness. I agree with kdownes that it does make it more powerful. The longest stanza, are the breaks between the lines suppose to be like that? Same thing in some other parts of it, seems a bit funky to me. But I've seen published poems like that too so it may not be a big deal
#4
wonderful

you could be the most literate , slickest poet in the world and still not be able to fake emotion like that
Reaching for the sun
one may forget
the feet which
ground him
#5
lovely.
well, that's hardly the word, but y'know.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#6
thanks everyone, I honestly don't remember writing this. Reading it, does make me a bit sad though.
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#7
This is the **** I've been waiting for from you. Get that brain of yours working and remember this ****!
#8
^ i dunno about all that, as I quite enjoy your more thoughtful, topical poems, but I did particularly like this as well. wonderfully emotive, really made me want to come up there and comfort you.

I especially liked the blueberry / blues line, I'm gonna drop that on some girl and report back with results.
#9
Don't get me wrong, I'd really liked the previous work. But there was something missing - not all the time, of course.
#11
<3 this honesty.
マリ「しあわっせはーあるいってこないだーからあるいってゆっくんだねーん 
いっちにっちいっぽみーかでさんぽ
 さーんぽすすんでにっほさっがるー 
じーんせいはっわんつー!ぱんち・・・


"Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear." - from Tao Te Ching