#1
i decided since im at a crossroads with my other songs, to write a quick pop punk one for the fun of it

no lyrics yet, so i apologize for any repitition.

please let me know what you think of the solo.

now without any further ado i present!

edit: btw, c4c
Attachments:
pop punk 2.zip
Last edited by ninja.kitty at Jan 14, 2009,
#2
It sounds pretty good now I really want to hear it actually played.
Fear the Evil Chainsaw Wielding Penguin...
#3
much better pop-punk than I've ever been able to write. I like the almost "full" chords in the chorus, I like the harmonies and palm-mutes. The solo is nice, I cannot write solos one bit, even for this type of music.
Lord Gold feeds from your orifices and he wants to see you sweat.
Lord Gold probes you publicly and makes your pussy wet.
Now say his name.....
#4
The bass line in the intro is coool.
Intro 1, 2 were allright, but 3,4 after if were too much, and they didnt sound as good.
Intro 5,6 really reminded me of the cure.
the little thing at bar 33 was good, but i would have done it twice, the second one doing a similar thing but with an A chord. and then ring out on A.
verse was allright, but the lead on part 3 i really didnt like.
bridge could have been better. some of the solo was alright, some i didnt like. Personaly i think a much simpiler solo would have suited it alot more.

C4C?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1045652
#5
I've pretty much gotta agree with the guy above 3 and 4 on the intros could be taken out as the intro does go on a bit but apart from that its a hard song to diss! Its a brilliantly structed sounding song. If I personally would change one thing it would be to take out the solo, I dont think pop punk would have such an intricate solo in all honesty its good dont get me wrong but I dont think it fits the rest of the song.
Get some lyrics and melody down boy!

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1045489
#6
lol, yeah... i went a little crazy with the solo.

i purposely made the other parts simple so i could sing with them...

but since im not singing with the solo, i decided to go a little crazy, :P

sort of a redemption thing, hehe....

anyway, ill crit your guys' songs later today

edit :
Quote by wtbskill91
It sounds pretty good now I really want to hear it actually played.

i uploaded the solo if that makes you happy
Last edited by ninja.kitty at Jan 14, 2009,
#7
I really like this! Intro is so happy and bouncy which is obviously a very good thing in this genre. Cool guitar in the verses, and nice change to a more distorted style. I guess the chord progression is kinda generic, but that could be said about most pop punk bands. This sorta reminds me of All American Rejects, and Four Year Strong.

The solo is awesome. I disagree with the idea that interesting/difficult solos can't be used in pop punk because... why not? Really good bit of work.
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#8
dude, I like it. simple and not exactly that creative but hey, it's pop punk.

well written, bass was cool in the beginning. lead lines were nice and the solo was sweet. definitely needs to stay.
I think you need some cool leads in the chorus but that's just me.

good work with this man. 'twas a good song.
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...


...You're still disappointing them...
#9
That is some pure magic, man. Loved it.

The solo was pretty complex for a pop-punk song, but hey, who's complaining?
#10
you guys have not heard many pop punk songs have you?
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...


...You're still disappointing them...
#11
hey man, thanks for the crit. just got in from italy on a trip with some college friends of mine. it was beautiful to say the least.

Anyways, now u know my stance on pop punk..im just not a fan personally. BUT, this song was musically constructed very well and, all my biased opinion aside, i really liked it.

The intro was cool, i liked the fact that you layered the instruments to come in at different times, timeless technique that always works well. I say leave all the parts of it in, i liked it with the little 3 note arpeggios.

The verses didnt really do it for me, as i found myself wanting to hear the vocals haha. its set up great for vocals so i hope you got some for it. sonically, verse pt. 3 has it goin on. i like the palm muted lead. very flowing.

The chorus is a chorus, cool progression and i can hear a climatic change. so, nicely written.

ahh the bridge is, by far, my favorite riff. really cool timing on the chords. one thing i noticed...i think you should switch up the riff on the rhythm guitar. the solo doesnt sound quite right over this progression..maybe go to a quieter verse riff, or mess with the chorus progression a bit. it just sounded a bit choppy with the off-kilter rhythm under that solo.

The solo itself was quite nice, really. screw people that say solos dont belong in pop punk. if you have a guitar and a feel for the music, you can play a solo and u should. nicely arranged. work a little more on phrasing parts of the solo over the chords and youre in like flynn!

Overall ninja, id say this was a pretty good song. not my cup o tea but it gets the job done for fans of GD, B182, etc, etc. im gonna give it an 8.5/10

take care man!
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