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#1
Just for fun, i'm gonna put up the top 10 posters from the last thread

Out of 11,221 posts:

1. Freezer Burn - 721
2. Våd Hamster - 715
3. SomeoneYouKnew - 287
4. rigiddigits - 285
5. lordofthefood1 - 256
6. Lethal Dosage - 241
7. Seryaph - 241
8. InTheFlesh! - 212
9. SomeEvilDude - 212
10. Zaphod_Beeblebr - 193

The FAQ consists of questions that are posted often in the relationship thread. Now, no one knows everything about women, but certain users have different experiences that contribute to the thread. There are a few users in the relationship thread that are regulars and/or veterans and have great advice:
(Or, if you feel too embarrassed to post your problem in the thread you can PM any of these regulars)

Freezer Burn, Våd Hamster, rigiddigits, SomeoneYouKnew, rtbsmgsmf, The Spoon, Seryaph, SomeEvilDude, u.n.t.a.m.e.d., domino92, thedefrockednun, InsantKarma94, MrGuitarGuy01, thanksgiving, and Another bassist. (If I forgot you, PM me and I'll add you)

The answers to the FAQ represent my personal opinions, and you can choose to use them or not.

But FB, what is this thread about??

Seryaph:

Frankly, dude, this thread is not here to give people step by step instructions on how to ask a girl out, or even how to get a girl to like you.
We will give you advice, all of the advice we can, but we cannot give you step by step instructions for multiple reasons.
a) the only person who truly understands the situation is yourself. We don't know what the girls you are interested in look like, are interested in, what their personalities are, etc.
b) we don't want to create a dependence on this thread to figure out every step of this process. You have to go out there and try it. There is risk involved, certainly. But the best way to learn is to just go out there and do it. If you succeed then you know what works, if you fail you will learn what doesn't.

I think that answers it^

FAQ, PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING

  • So there's this girl i like, what do I do?
    First off, DO NOT TELL HER YOU LIKE HER. You should show her that you like her, not tell her, as actions are stronger than words. After getting to know her better, ask her on a date. If nothing else, atleast get her number.


  • This girl I like has a boy friend, yet tells me she likes me more. I don't get it?
    She's lying to you. You have to listen to what she is showing you through her actions, and not listen to what she says. If she wanted to be dating you instead, she would do so.


  • I'm still friends with my ex, and it's not working out, help?
    In my opinion, if you're friends before you date, you're friends afterwards, and if you aren't friends before you date, then you aren't friends afterwards(thanks to rtbsmgsmf for this). However, i'm friends with my exes, i'm just not as close with them as I use to be.


  • I don't like my girlfriend anymore, what do I do?
    You should break up with her. The relationship can't be healthy if feelings aren't mutual. If you don't, the relationship will eventually fail in the long run.


  • How do I get over my ex-girlfriend?
    Becoming friends with the ex won't help at all. If you truly want to get over them, stop talking to them. My best advice to this question is to go out and meet new girls, they will help you get your ex off your mind.


  • What's the friendzone?
    The friendzone is a place where all the guys that are just friends to the girls go when they are too sensitive and nice to a girl. Usually, these guys bear the name of emotional tampon. You don't want to be in the friend zone if you are looking for a relationship because once you're in it, you're stuck there 99.9% of the time.


  • So how do I avoid the friendzone?
    Don't be a wussy around women. Girls love guys with confidence, and guys who can be themselves at all times. Don't try to be someone you're not, as it will come around to bite you where it hurts.


  • So I like this girl/my bestfriend, but she doesn't like me, basically i'm friend-zoned. What do I do?
    Move on. Going after this girl would be a waste of time for both you and her. Save yourself the embarrassment of making a move on her and find new women.


  • My best friend is dating/dated this girl and I like her. Help?
    -If they are still dating: move on and forget about her, as it's not cool to mess up other people's relationships, especially your best friend's.

    -If they aren't dating anymore: talk to your friend about it; he may or may not be cool with it, you should respect his decision. Some people believe that it's wrong to date a buddy's ex but it's up to you.

If I am missing any FAQ's that you deem should be here, PM me.
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
Last edited by Freezer Burn at Apr 19, 2009,
#2
By thedefrockednun

(If you don't feel like reading the whole thing, at least read the stuff I (Freezer Burn) have highlighted. Think of it as a tl;dr )

Where To Go On A Date:

1) The Movies, this is the most common place to go but it's one of the worst because it involves very little talking and interactions, I don't recommend it as a place to go on your first date

2) Go for a walk with your girlfriend/boyfriend, to the park, to a river, through a forest, you could sit down somewhere and talk and get to know each other better (and do other stuff )

3) Go to the beach, whether it's a lake, the sea or the ocean the beach is a great place to have fun, it's romantic and you can talk to your gf/bf.

4) Go to a Restaurant or a cafe you can talk for a long time and enjoy a good meal.

5) Bowling, this is probably one of the best places to go, you can talk your "companion" and you have fun bowling.


6) A Picnic, this may sound stupid but if you do it right you could end up having a great time

7) Go to an Amusement park, the circus, the zoo

8) Biking is good as well

9) Music Shows, whether in a real concert or in a pub/bar/cafe you could go see some nice gigs.

10) Invite her/him to your place, watch a movie together, listen to music, play a song for them, show them your music (if you write any)

11) Some other Ideas: Sailing (or any other boat), going for a drive around town, mountain climbing, hiking through nature, horseback riding (kind of rare).

I hope I helped some of you out.

By MrGuitarGuy01

I think a great place to go on a date is Laser Quest. Now before you look at me like an idiot and tell me that's a "kids place"....let me explain and set up the scenario.

I'm sure you've talked to girl before this date, but now your at the place, you've bought your game(s) and now your waiting for your turn, you talk a little, make her laugh, small talk whatever. Now its your turn to play...you go into the room...and its dark...REAL dark. Now she gets a little scared, and she doesn't know anyone else but you....so now you got yourself a girl who's following you. You're in the arena, you got your gun, you shoot some people, but you talk to her, and make sure you don't stop. Everything is going well so far...and its dark, and your already hugging her, or she has her arm around you because shes scared. You've been running around, shes all hot and sweaty....(YAY YAY!) shes looking good...Now you get to start doing stuff...and did i mention your armor vibrates when you get shot?.....use your imagination.

But what if it all goes wrong.? **** you payed for a game..play it! if she complains you just say...Hey it is a game you know.

I've done it before...and its great. And just in case your wondering how old i am? 17, and so are the girls. ****, its something different....or you can stick to the cliche movies.

That's just my opinion.

domino_92's Guide to Break-Ups


So my girlfriend/boyfriend broke up with me...

This happens to everyone at some point in their life, and chances are that it will happen more than once. Here's a few common problems and misconceptions people have about break-ups, and ways to overcome them.


I'm having trouble getting over my ex. What do I do?

This is the most common problem ever to occur in break-ups. There is an age old expression that applies here; 'There are plenty more fish in the sea'. No matter how perfect your ex may have seemed, there are probably 1,000,000 people out there that are just like them. It's up to you to go out and find them. Here's some suggestions to get over an ex:


1. CUT ALL CONTACT - I cannot stress this enough. If you want to get over your ex, you have to stop talking to, calling, and texting them. It's not impossible to be friends with an ex, but you need AT LEAST a month or two without seeing or contacting them in any way to move on and get a grip on yourself.
2. MEET OTHER PEOPLE - You're single. Take advantage of that. Go out and meet new girls/boys. Flirt around. You're no longer tied down to one person, so take a look at all your new options.
3. HANG OUT WITH FRIENDS - Nobody knows you better than your friends and family. Let them cheer you up. Go to a party, the cinema, shopping, etc...
4. KEEP BUSY - The more time you have to yourself, the more time you're going to spend thinking about your ex. Find a hobby or something to keep you preoccupied. Join the gym, clean your toilet, actually pick up that guitar that's just sitting in the corner collecting dust. Anything that will keep you going throughout the day.


My girlfriend told me she wants to take a 'break'. What do I do?

Move on. 90% of the time 'break' is synonymous for 'over', but she's too afraid to hurt your feelings to tell you that. Treat it like you would a normal break-up and move on. Follow the above advice, because your relationship is essentially over.


I'm with a new girl now, but my ex has started showing interest in me again. Should I break-up with me current girlfriend to be with my ex again?

NO! Absolutely not! The only reason your ex is showing interest in you again is because she knows she can't have you. If you dump your new girl for the old one, she'll quickly lose interest, and then you'll be left with nothing. Focus on building and keeping a healthy relationship with your new girl.


Is it possible to be friends with an ex?

Absolutely. But in order to be friends with an ex, you have to get over all romantic feelings you have for them.

This should eliminate many questions regarding break-ups in this thread, but it won't eliminate all of them. If you don't think the answer to your problem is in here, feel free to PM or post your question in this thread in order to get more than one viewpoint.
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
Last edited by Freezer Burn at Jan 23, 2009,
#3
By InsantKarma94
Ok, I was asked to make a list of things to talk about/ keep a conversation going with a girl. I'm assuming this is for the first few encounters with a girl, before you decide to make a move or anything, so I won't go into detail about relationship related stuff, but by that time it should be pretty easy talking to her, and if it isn't you definately need to confront them about it and communicate. So, here is the list

(If you don't feel like reading the whole thing, at least read the stuff I (Freezer Burn) have highlighted. Think of it as a tl;dr )

What to talk about to a girl:

1. School/classes, fairly easy to talk about, just ask what classes she's taking or which she likes. How she's doing in her classes. Anything along those lines shoud work.

2. Sports, especially if she plays sports herself, or plays the same sport as you. Most guys are pretty knowledgeable in sports so that shouldnt be hard. Also, if she doesnt know a sport you could explain how it works to her.

3. Some advice, try to keep it geared towars things shes interested in, as she will then be more interested in talking to you, becuase girls love to talk about themselves. A simple way of bringing this up would just be to say "I hear you like(or play)..... , what's that like."

4. Some more advice, really listen to what she's saying. If you hear something special about her that she tells you, she may be impressed if you remember down the road and bring it up. (Don't fake interest though. If your not geniunely interested in talking to her then you obviously shouldn't be)

5. Music, everyone loves music, and everyone has their own taste in music, so let her talk about it. This also applies to favorite movies, TV shows, books(If she's into that), etc.

6. What she does for fun/ in her free time. Pretty self explanatory, just ask what she does on weekends or what she does with her friends.

7. You could comment on your surroundings, the weather, something in the news, anything remotely interesting to her really. ( Not video games, unless she plays them, or an obsessive hobby of yours)

8. Upcoming events around town/ in your school (If you go to one). This may help because afterwards you could always ask her if she wants to go with you to said event.

9. Don't talk about past relationships, and don't tell her you like her or anything like that.

10. Just initiate a conversation and see where it goes from there, just keep the conversation flowing.


11. Politics, not advised because it is a controversial issue, especially if you know she has a strong opinion on the topic. However, if you know she supports the same candidate as you, then you could talk about that. It would probably be best to not disagree too sharply in this area as you don't want to come off as a jerk.

12. Final thoughts for the day, let the conversation come naturally, it will work that way. Do not try to plan it out in your head or anything of that matter, it will end up getting screwed up.

13. Be yourself, don't make things up to try to get her to like you, she will find out, and it will come back to bite you in the ass. So just relax, talk about what comes naturally to you, and don't act like they are some goddess. They are not, they are humans just like you, so don't act like they are better than you, just start talking and they will talk back.

Hopefully that helps, if anyone has any additions just let me know.


Any amends, other successful viewpoints, etc. are open to discussion for addition to this post.

-Freezer Burn
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
Last edited by Freezer Burn at Jan 22, 2009,
#4
So a lot of the problems posted in this thread are from guys having relationship issues. But I've actually noticed quite a few that have been written by girls, and I thought that since I am one myself, and since I’ve had quite a bit of experience with relationships and the like, I'd contribute a little FAQ that might be helpful to some of them. It could be useful for guys to read too, we’ll see.

Obviously a lot of the main FAQ answers will apply to you, so go there first and just exchange where it says ‘girlfriend’ for ‘boyfriend’. (If you are straight. :P: )

DISCLAIMER: I don’t intend to condescend. I’m not expecting this to apply to everybody. Everyone thinks differently and I am by no means attempting to put you all in one box. Hell, I think more like a guy than most guys I know. I am not trying to say that all girls will experience these problems, or that girls only experience these problems. What I know is that men and women OFTEN see things in different ways, which can cause a lot of problems.

Consequently, here goes:


***GIRLS’ FAQ***


I don’t want to look stupid by flirting with someone who isn’t interested…how can I tell if he likes me without asking?
See if he’s doing anything listed in that FAQ for ‘how to show a girl you like her’! If you think he’s too shy to try that sort of stuff, try it with him instead and see how he reacts. And you won’t look stupid anyway, at least not if you’re subtle about it. The worst that can happen is he’ll take it as a compliment.

My friend told me he has feelings for me but I’d rather stay friends. How can I let him down gently without losing his friendship or making things awkward between us?
You need to be firm with him but be kind. It probably took a lot for him to get up the courage to tell you and you should let him know how you feel one way or the other so he can get over the idea of being with you, and move on to new girls. Don’t sugar the pill with compliments but try not to let it show if you’re freaked out either. If you’re plain not attracted to him, don’t be afraid to say so. If you think it’d be a bad idea but you are attracted to him still, you might want to consider leaving that part out. Personally I would. It’d only make things harder IMO.

How can I get guys to like me?
Be confident and be yourself. Act (and feel) like you’re not living and dying on whether he likes you back. Hold back on telling him your life story and leave a little to the imagination.

How can I get guys to respect me?
Don’t stand for any crap but don’t be controlling. Ask his opinion on things, listen to what he talks to you about and for god’s sake don’t be afraid to say what you think. Don’t bitch about other girls and don’t go on about your last relationship. Don’t tell lies or deliberately mess with his head, or do things to ‘test’ his feelings for you.

My ex-boyfriend is weirding me out and/or affecting my new relationship. How do I get through to him to leave me alone without making things worse?
Tell him once that you want him to stop behaving this way, and if he doesn’t listen to you then cut off all contact, or if you have to see one another, limit it to the bare minimum. You might have to sever some emotional ties with him to do so, but keeping him around will only prevent him from moving on. Don’t keep it a secret if he’s threatening you.

I really like my friend’s boyfriend and I think he likes me. Can I go there?
<subjective answer alert> No. Not cool. If you’re not prepared to move on, keep your distance and let their relationship run its course without your influence.

I have a boyfriend, but I’m thinking about somebody else more than him. What does this mean?
In my experience it’s a warning sign that the relationship is over, or will be soon. Things like this are usually a symptom of an underlying issue. If you don’t feel able to honestly continue a committed relationship with him, then end it before things go bad. If you’re sure it’s just a crush and you do want to keep going out with your boyfriend, then try to limit contact with the other person as best you can to take your mind off them and spend more time with your boy. You should also be prepared to let the other person know that you’re in a relationship and you’re going to keep it that way.

I’ve cheated on my boyfriend. a) Should I tell him? b) How can I fix it? c) Should we split up?
Again speaking from experience – be honest. It really isn’t worth trying to hide it, it’s better coming from you, and he’ll only get hurt in the long run if you try to protect him now. If you want to stay with him then tell him so, but don’t expect him to agree. Be straight up with him and apologise genuinely from the bottom of your heart. Don’t beg and plead or make dramatic promises you can’t fulfil. You have a lot of ground to make up. If you don’t think you can maintain a monogamous relationship, or if you think that your broken trust can’t be built back up again, then it’s time to say goodbye and try to learn from your mistakes.

I can’t trust my boyfriend and/or I think he’s cheating on me. Should I talk to him about it?
Tricky one this. If you have GOOD REASON to believe that he’s not being honest with you, then ask him about it. Don’t accuse him of anything before you have all the facts though. If you suspect you’re just being paranoid, try your best to work through it on your own without pressuring him to act differently. If you’re unhappy with how he’s acting around other girls then be aware that it probably won’t do any good telling him to change, and if you have different standards about that sort of thing then you’re better off apart.

My boyfriend makes me feel like I’m worthless, but I can’t face the thought of breaking up with him. How can I make things better?
Seriously, break up with that douchebag. Nobody has the right to make you feel like that and you deserve a hundred times better.

I don’t want to be in a committed relationship right now but I still want to have fun and spend time with guys. How can I let him know I want something less serious without coming off as a slut?
Make sure you both know the score ASAP. Make it clear what you want and what you can’t offer him. It is perfectly acceptable and really quite common to wish to avoid serious relationships, particularly when you’re young. It’s often misinterpreted as wanting to sleep around, which is a different thing entirely. You can still share a great connection with someone without feeling restricted by the boundaries of a relationship; you just have to find the right person. He’ll understand if you explain your reasons clearly, and then it’s down to him to back off if he doesn’t relate to them. Just be up front about it and don’t wait until it’s too late.

My partner is asking me to do something that I’m not comfortable with. Is this worth breaking up over? Will I lose him if I say no?
If you’ve thought this through and you definitely aren’t happy taking a leap of faith and giving it a shot, then you need to tell him. It doesn’t mean the relationship is over. You’re not going to have absolutely everything in common with a guy. However, if it’s such a big deal to either of you that you think you’re no longer compatible, then you’re better off apart.

I’m not happy with how my boyfriend lives his life. How can I get him to change?
You can’t. If you disagree with his lifestyle to the extent that you’re getting mad at him and you can’t see it from his point of view, then you shouldn’t be together IMO.

I’m thinking about ending my relationship, but I don’t want to hurt him. Is it possible to have a smooth break-up?
Yes, but don’t count on it. Even if you’re totally prepared with what to say and do, it entirely depends on how the other person reacts and that’s an unknown quantity. Just focus on what you want to say, be clear and honest and don’t beat around the bush. If there’s one phrase to avoid, it’s “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” Do it in person if you possibly can. Don’t expect friendship and don’t compensate for making him upset by saying things you don’t mean. And don’t feel guilty afterward. You did the right thing.
Last edited by rigiddigits at Jan 22, 2009,
#5
THE ORIGINAL VÅD HAMSTER FAQ
*A work in progress.


What women want-


You see it all the time, right? the girl you want, walking of with a total asshole. You're thinking to yourself, WHY? You know he will hurt her, and that she's not what she's looking for.
You ask yourself, what does she see in him?


The answer, my friend, is, fortunately, simple.


BALLS. (Confidence)


By far the majority of women want a man who can take action, a man who isn't afraid to do what pleases him, and be who he is. And stands up for that.

Women fall for this very fast. And if there is something that assholes have in plenty, then balls is it.

Although some women actually want to be treated bad, the majority are merely oblivious to their 'bad' side (Humans tend to neglect things, even when they are right in front of them.) As such, trying to reveal the true nature of the asshole to a woman is harder than stomaching 48 hours of straight MTV reality shows.


Does this mean I have the choice of either being eternally single, or starting to treat people bad?


Yes No!

You can have balls like a whale, and still help people off the train with their bikes.

The keyword here is INTEGRITY

-

Including what I stated above (Beneath the 'balls' text, you can't miss it) you'll need a few things. You can probably imagine a lot, but I'll throw some in here for personal enjoyment and TL;DR value.

A big one is independence. NOTHING is more of a turn off than a guy who can't take care of himself without his mommy, or anything related. A man who can make things work by himself is a turnon to most women.

Another thing is spontanity. Women are given cursed with a sense of order and schedule, and thus few things pleases them more than when a guy can take them OUT of that schedule, into something new and exciting.

I'm not talking disrupting her life with dates every other day, nor that you can't have order in your life(this is preferred, actually). AND women DO like security and stability, but heavy repetetion is the ultimate female-repellant.


But how do I treat women right, Kurt?


First of all, WOMEN ARE NOT FOR PUTTING ON A PEDESTAL.

You don't treat them like dirt (like you wouldn't any other human) either, but just as another homo sapien. Read Rigiddigit's FAQ for this part, because I'm too tired to type that right now.


Kurt, help, MY RELATIONSHIP IS BREAKING UP AND WE FIGHT ALL THE TIME!


Ah, you have a problem with something called COMMUNICATION.

I can't begin to cover the massive aspect that is communication, but I can lead you on your way.

If something is wrong in your relationship, you talk about it. Don't know how? I'll tell you-

Sit down, just you and your loved one, somewhere quiet. Now, you must both put all cards on the table. No lies, no secrets, no alterior motives. Only truth.

This is important because you MUST treat your partner as an equal in this situation. You both have a problem, and only together can you solve this.

Speak gently, with understanding, and care for your partner. It is not anybody's fault, it is something you must conquer together.

They key to a healthy communication line is that both individuals get heard, respected, and understood.


Kurt! How do I tell if a girl likes me?


Use your logic. If she likes you she'll want to be around you. She'll keep her attention towards you, touch you, look at you, be in a good/hyper-ish mood.

She will also try to look her best around you, so she'll fling her hair around, make sure her clothes are in place, etc etc. Look for signs that she wants you to notice her.

Girls are VERY simple when it comes to this. You shouldn't be in doubt if a girl likes you.


THE ULTIMATE FRIENDZONE FAQ.


So, you have been FZ'd, and you're wondering what to do. Now, in most cases I would say do what everyone else tells you, and just move on.

HOWEVER-
for the people with big balls, and a slight emotional deathwish, here follows the most epic thing you can do when FZ'd.

You use her security against her. If you are FZ'd with a girl that DOESN'T have a boyfriend, you can use this. Otherwise, it won't work.

If you recognise these quotes:

''You're the only one I can tell these things''

''You're so good at listening''

''You're the best friend I have''


Then you are the in the perfect situation (as much as it gets when FZ'd)


Here comes the kicker-
tell her you've found someone who you're really interested in. Preferably someone who doesn't even like you(as to not hurt that girl's feelings)
Now, what you want to do is pretend to like this girl, and use all the time you used to use on your FZ girl on her instead. Or pretend to, it really doesn't matter.
When she calls you, or wants to see you, tell her you have to go out with the other girl, and the few times where you actually see FZgirl, talk about the other girl ALL the time.

This will cause an utter shock in the mind of your FZgirl. She was completely certain she knew where she had you.

She was proven wrong. This provides two things women love-

Uncertianty
Drama

Chances are she will also start to miss you (even if you were just her emotional tampon) And THAT, is exactly what we want. This can lead to two things-

Her going FFFFFFFUUUUUUUU- and being in a completely out-of-it state. This gives you the pleasure of internally laughing at her, and you will have the satisfaction of having the last word, as you leave her in the dust. From here on, just stop talking to her at all. Move on.

It can also spark a golden opportunity. There is a slight chance she will develop romantic feelings for you in this process, and this is to be exploited.
If FZgirl starts to touch you alot, flirt more heavily, and generally SHOWER you with attention, that is good indicator that our plan is working.

Soon there should be an opportunity when she leans in on you just right, giving off all the right signals. Now, seal the deal, and BINGO. You got out of the friendzone.


How do I know this? It happened to me. We lasted for 2½ years, and it was the best relationship I ever had. (others report good results as well)

It might work, and it might not. But hey, YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE.
Last edited by Våd Hamster at May 18, 2009,
#6
By:RigidDigits

Here is a chart type thing, which is a reflection of how I feel and how I know many other girls feel about this. These might seem a bit strict, and you'll most likely just do what feels natural when you're actually in this situation. It's not always this black-and-white but it might help your confidence, sooooo:

***90% of Communication***

A Physical Contact Guide for Heterosexual Boys and Lesbians


Imagine the female body (don't get too carried away now )

Body part / OK to touch at your stage (i.e. just starting to hang out with her):

Face / No - too forward
Hair / Occasionally, stroking is creepy though
Neck / No - too forward
Shoulders / Briefly if at all, personally I find it weird
Back (top) / No - too 'friendly'
Back ('small') / Yes, briefly
Arms / Yes
Hands / Yes, briefly
Ass / No - waaaay too forward
Hips/waist / Yes, briefly
Thighs / No - too forward
Knees / Yeah, if you're sitting down and you want to start off a conversation
Rest of legs / Yes, briefly
Feet / Probably not.

Basically you want to find little ways to touch her either at the beginning of or during your conversation.

If you see her in the street for example, a touch on the arm is nice to say hello.

If you see her turned away from you (e.g. at a bar or something) then it's OK to touch her on her waist or lower back to get her to turn round and say hi.

If you're standing up talking, and she says something that you really identify with (e.g. mentions that she likes a band you love) then touch her on the arm for longer as you enthuse about having this awesome thing in common.

If you're sitting down talking, you can add touching her hand, and just above her knee to your list. Same applies; if she's said something funny, something you like, or if there's a pause in the conversation, accompany your next sentence (e.g. "So - *touches knee, arm or hand* are you hungry? Let's get something to eat!")

You can also use touch to be playful, like if she says something dumb or that you disagree with, you can joke about it and touch her in the same way that I described above.

If you're laying down talking, you lucky guy, then you can touch all of the above PLUS her hip/waist, and if she hasn't got it by then, you can do something cute, like link little fingers or put your feet on top of her feet or something.

All this stuff is not only a good way to tell her that you're not just another friend, but also a way of checking how she feels too. You'll be able to tell an awful lot by her response. If you're unsure, stick to 'standing up talking' moves until you feel confident to give something more a try.

To be honest, all you have to do is make her feel comfortable around you and pick up the right signals. If she doesn't feel the same way then she has plenty of time to let you know (non-verbally) because you will know not to come on too strong.
#8
YAY!!! there is a girls FAQ! this will solve all my problems with boys!!!!!!

EDIT: valentine's day is coming up, could someone make a list of good presents for girls and boys?
Last edited by kilbie at Jan 22, 2009,
#9
first page?
how would i go about winning a girl back?
we were together at one point but she broke up because she felt guilty with herself cause she saw how much i went out of my way to be with her, for example, i would take myself out of bookings at the studio just to be with her. IDK how to win her back, i was thinking of writing a song and recording it and sending it to her.
Last edited by convictionless at Jan 22, 2009,
#12
First Page maybe?

To win a girl back, write a song
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O CANADA!
#13
First page!

I suck at relationships for myself, but I tend to give good advice, so I'll help anyone who needs it...
Quote by Les_Frederiksen
PlayMadness, you give me hope for mankind.

Quote by Darksucker
PlayMadness - Jesus 2.0

Quote by genghisgandhi
Society's doing great. There's a rise of people like PlayMadness. I feel pretty good about the way things are going.
#14
Quote by ZanasCross
Permission to switch Vad's post with the one from rigid in my post, so they line up?


That should be fine. Thanks a bunch Zanas
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
#16
I'll try to give some advice too if i can, as long as the "date doctors" dont beat me to it lol
#17
Quote by convictionless
first page?
how would i go about winning a girl back?
we were together at one point but she broke up because she felt guilty with herself cause she saw how much i went out of my way to be with her, for example, i would take myself out of bookings at the studio just to be with her. IDK how to win her back, i was thinking of writing a song and recording it and sending it to her.
If she broke up with you out of guilt because you were putting in more effort than she was, then trying even harder (although out of context it's an awesome gesture) won't help I don't think. It's okay to feel like you'd do anything for a girl, but you don't have to show it that much. If you're bending over backwards to please her and she's not prepared to reciprocate then you need to stop doing it if you want things to change. Do you guys talk at all, currently?
#19
Hey RT. Been poking around a bit, but never asked for help myself. Now I need it.

Brace for possible semi-full wall of text.

So, background story first. I met this girl in the summer, about 1.5 years ago. We got along great, and had great fun in the couple days we spent out there, nothing too serious, but we were both interested in each other. (I believe she was). She was amazing. And I truly liked/like her alot.

Jump forward about 1.5 years later. We begin talking again, and I'm trying to be as nice as I can. I drop a few hints, etc. Nothing huge. It seems like she still might like me too. Problem is, despite how many feelings I have for this girl, I'm not single. Ouch.

My girlfriend is showing the usual signs, and our relationship isn't progressing. She's going through some tough spots in her life right now, family, friends, school etc. Should I call it off in hopes of getting back with this girl I'm so caught up in? How does one approach this situation, after almost 2 years? Thanks in advance.

EDIT: Sorry to disappoint, no wall of text.
Last edited by T.J.G at Jan 22, 2009,
#20
Quote by damnphrophet
Ok, maybe you can help me with this girl i really like .


*FIRST WALL OF TEXT ZOMG CONGRATZ!!!!!"


Uffff, sorry for the ****damn wall of text , but that was neccesary.

Now i ask you, guys, girls, what's your opinion about this?
Can a relationship born in all this mess??

I really don't know what to do, all i can say is that we're no longer friendzoned...


So you say you're past the FZ eh?

Well, my suggestion is to sit her down and have a nice long conversation about everything, about you two, and anything else that's on your mind. At the end, ask if she's interested in a relationship, and even if she's not, tell her that you still want to be a really good friend of hers.

FREEZIT:

Quote by T.J.G
Hey RT. Been poking around a bit, but never asked for help myself. Now I need it.

Brace for possible semi-full wall of text.

So, background story first. I met this girl in the summer, about 1.5 years ago. We got along great, and had great fun in the couple days we spent out there, nothing too serious, but we were both interested in each other. (I believe she was). She was amazing. And I truly liked/like her alot.

Jump forward about 1.5 years later. We begin talking again, and I'm trying to be as nice as I can. I drop a few hints, etc. Nothing huge. It seems like she still might like me too. Problem is, despite how many feelings I have for this girl, I'm not single. Ouch.

My girlfriend is showing the usual signs, and our relationship isn't progressing. She's going through some tough spots in her life right now, family, friends, school etc. Should I call it off in hopes of getting back with this girl I'm so caught up in? How does one approach this situation, after almost 2 years? Thanks in advance.


I believe you will be the first '09er I will have helped

Hmmm, give your current g/f some space, about maybe a week to herself, let her figure out what's up. Afterward, if she's still up for continuing the relationship, I strongly advise you to keep it. If not, go for the other girl.
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
Last edited by Freezer Burn at Jan 22, 2009,
#21
Quote by damnphrophet
Ok, maybe you can help me with this girl i really like .


I meet her at junior school, that was 5 yeras ago, of course in all that three years i didn't know her at all. We were just classmates. But then we arrived at highschooll.
I met a guy that later become my best friend, and he is like a brother to me now.
And as you imagined, that girl met him at the same time, and they ended in a relationship.
At that point, that girl was becoming my friend.

6 months later, (10 months ago) they broke up, in a very big trouble**** , so i went there with all my efforts to help her, ( at that point i were dating with a girl, but nothing was clear so, she helped me as well ), and we become friends, very good friends, at the point that i knew all about her, and she knows all about me.

But then, summer came, and we spent a lot of time together then, those were great times for us, two friends having fun everywhere bla bla bla, we then beggin calling us "dumb brothers" (don't ask why hehe) and at that point i never felt anything to her, i just knew that was just a friendship, and no more.

And schooll began again, she stopped calling me brother, for a while i was wondering why, but then i just ignored that, and in class, we spent a lot of time together, and everyone around us was like "Hey, and when are you dating her?" "Hey, you two seem very happy together *laughs*"...

With all the people that beggin with that, i realized that our friendship seemed like another sort of thing, so when a friend asked me "hey dude, you really like her, right?" and i didn't had any answer for that, he went with the girl and asked the same thing, she dind't answered anything, of course.
And then i thought everything was messed up, so i realized, by the way she talked to me, the way she asked me for help, the way she acted when i was near, the way she played with me, with my hands, the way she let me played with her, that she REALLY liked me.

I didn't wanted to lose the friendship with her, so didn't did anything, neither realize that i REALLY liked her TOO, so time passed and 2009 came, now I really like her, i can't stop paying attention to her, but she is very , very shy, and as it looks she seems very weird to have something with the best friend of her ex, she also doesn't want to lose our friendship, but still likes me, and well, when we are together, we can't stop talking, about anything in special, we can't stop having great times together anywhere, and I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITHOUT LOSING ANYTHING WITH HER !

I understand her, and i understand that she can't be very long holding this, and neither me, cos we are going to college in august, and we are gonna separate there.
By the way, i am 17 years old, and she gets 17 in april.

Last week, i went out with her to walk downtown, but as we met with a lot of friends , i told her that i were gonna invite her some coffee, she accepted, but then somtehing happened, and we couldn't go for the stupid coffee, and yesterday she asked me to go for the coffee, and all the stuff, we, together alone.


Uffff, sorry for the ****damn wall of text , but that was neccesary.

Now i ask you, guys, girls, what's your opinion about this?
Can a relationship born in all this mess??

I really don't know what to do, all i can say is that we're no longer friendzoned...



yeah i'd say go for it. you're not in the friendzone and you already know all about her so there wont be any suprises
#22
Thanks for the fast reply Freezer Burn. Its been like this for a few weeks now with her, I think I'm almost ready to end it. It seems like a waste of energy, we've been together since June.
#23
I approve. Thanks for setting it up again, FB!
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#24
So...

Yesterday, I fell asleep on this girl's couch, and I barely know her. Well, anyways I wake up in the middle of the night and she's on top of me looking at me, her face like 3 inches away from mine. I was all "Wth" cause I have a girlfriend, right? And she was all "I know you have a girlfriend, but it's something I've wanted for a long time" Like I said, I barely know her, so I was all "Rolls Eyes" but she kisses me anyhow. Now, I have to explain to my girlfriend what happened. So... truth, or is it too farfetched?
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#25
Quote by rock_star77
So...

Yesterday, I fell asleep on this girl's couch, and I barely know her. Well, anyways I wake up in the middle of the night and she's on top of me looking at me, her face like 3 inches away from mine. I was all "Wth" cause I have a girlfriend, right? And she was all "I know you have a girlfriend, but it's something I've wanted for a long time" Like I said, I barely know her, so I was all "Rolls Eyes" but she kisses me anyhow. Now, I have to explain to my girlfriend what happened. So... truth, or is it too farfetched?


if that other girl can twist the story around to your girlfriend then yeah tell your girlfriend the truth first.
#26
*sigh* I feel like my world has fallen apart. I've never had a girlfriend or a friend thats a girl
, and I'm 18! and I'm like the most silent guy at my school. The only person at school I could talk to was this really cute, nice girl in my geometry class who I have a lot in common with. I really thought I had a chance until I looked at her MySpace and found out she's in a relationship. Now I feel like giving up on life. What would you do if you were me?
Last edited by HGS9669 at Jan 22, 2009,
#27
Quote by HGS9669
*sigh* I feel like my world has fallen apart. I've never had a girlfriend or a friend thats a girl
, and I'm 18! and I'm like the most silent guy at my school. The only person at school I could talk to was this really cute, nice girl in my geometry class who I have a lot in common with. I really thought I had a chance until I looked at her MySpace and found out she's in a relationship. Now I feel like giving up on life. What would you do if you were me?

Well honestly, attractiveness does matter, even if someone tells you it doesn't. Honestly they have to be attracted to you. So try to highlight somethings girls like... in a perfect world, you wouldn't have to do this, but you sound sad, I only want to help. Now listen, if you have bad genes, and just haven't grown into your looks yet, try your best to keep from being overweight. If you're scrawny, start a work out schedule. AND by God, get involved in team sports! It elevates every level of fitness, esteem, and attractiveness. Assuming you're actually a good person, these should be sufficient tools to acquire a relationship!
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O CANADA!
#28
Hey guys, nice seeing a new Relationship thread.

I've got a question just about personal opinion for you guys. I broke up with my girlfriend in November, and we're solid friends now. She's offered to mess around (no intercourse, but everything else) even though we've broken up.

Now, would it be wrong to mess around with her? I couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty, but I'm not sure.

What do you think?
WHY IS EVERYONE IN THE PIT A FUCKING METALCORE KID
#29
Quote by Kartman
Hey guys, nice seeing a new Relationship thread.

I've got a question just about personal opinion for you guys. I broke up with my girlfriend in November, and we're solid friends now. She's offered to mess around (no intercourse, but everything else) even though we've broken up.

Now, would it be wrong to mess around with her? I couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty, but I'm not sure.

What do you think?

Always be careful with being friends with benefits. Even if the benefits are limited, emotional feelings tend to come back sooner or later. If you feel good about, I say go for it, but otherwise you should probably talk to her about it....
OPINIONATED STATEMENT

Meaningful Song Lyrics
Inside my signature
Make me look deep
And misunderstood


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Out of context hilarious quote!


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Out of context compliment!


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#30
Don't do the FWB thing. It ruins 1) Friendships 2) Possible Relationships.

You don't know you'll NEVER want to be with her again, don't ruin it now as friends.
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O CANADA!
#31
Quote by rock_star77
Well honestly, attractiveness does matter, even if someone tells you it doesn't. Honestly they have to be attracted to you. So try to highlight somethings girls like... in a perfect world, you wouldn't have to do this, but you sound sad, I only want to help. Now listen, if you have bad genes, and just haven't grown into your looks yet, try your best to keep from being overweight. If you're scrawny, start a work out schedule. AND by God, get involved in team sports! It elevates every level of fitness, esteem, and attractiveness. Assuming you're actually a good person, these should be sufficient tools to acquire a relationship!


That's good advice but it doesn't answer my question. If you were me how would you get over that.
#32
INB4 END OF FIRST PAGE (40ppp)
yay new thread!
Quote by rock_star77
Don't do the FWB thing. It ruins 1) Friendships 2) Possible Relationships.

You don't know you'll NEVER want to be with her again, don't ruin it now as friends.
imo if he makes it clear that it'll never go beyond that again and that nothing will come of new feelings, then there's no harm. maybe the girl just wants a little fun.
Last edited by InTheFlesh! at Jan 22, 2009,
#33
Quote by HGS9669
That's good advice but it doesn't answer my question. If you were me how would you get over that.

Oh... obvs man. Find someone else. I know it's not easy at first. But one 18 year old to another, it comes to you. Just don't detatch yourself from feeling anything.
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#34
Quote by T.J.G
Thanks for the fast reply Freezer Burn. Its been like this for a few weeks now with her, I think I'm almost ready to end it. It seems like a waste of energy, we've been together since June.


I aim to please

If you feel it in your heart that it's not the right thing to do at the moment, then do it. Just don't regret it.

Quote by Pannenkoeken
I approve. Thanks for setting it up again, FB!


Anytime

Quote by rock_star77
So...

Yesterday, I fell asleep on this girl's couch, and I barely know her. Well, anyways I wake up in the middle of the night and she's on top of me looking at me, her face like 3 inches away from mine. I was all "Wth" cause I have a girlfriend, right? And she was all "I know you have a girlfriend, but it's something I've wanted for a long time" Like I said, I barely know her, so I was all "Rolls Eyes" but she kisses me anyhow. Now, I have to explain to my girlfriend what happened. So... truth, or is it too farfetched?


Tell her exactly what happened. If she doesn't believe you, then there's nothing you can do. I'd just laugh it off if she didn't believe you.

Quote by HGS9669
*sigh* I feel like my world has fallen apart. I've never had a girlfriend or a friend thats a girl
, and I'm 18! and I'm like the most silent guy at my school. The only person at school I could talk to was this really cute, nice girl in my geometry class who I have a lot in common with. I really thought I had a chance until I looked at her MySpace and found out she's in a relationship. Now I feel like giving up on life. What would you do if you were me?


You're just not talking to girls enough. Broaden your range, talk to girls that you wouldn't normally talk to, who knows, you might find the right one

Quote by Kartman
Hey guys, nice seeing a new Relationship thread.

I've got a question just about personal opinion for you guys. I broke up with my girlfriend in November, and we're solid friends now. She's offered to mess around (no intercourse, but everything else) even though we've broken up.

Now, would it be wrong to mess around with her? I couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty, but I'm not sure.

What do you think?


Friends with benefits. With an ex. That you broke up with. Please, don't. I tried this with my ex who broke up with me, and she got angry after about a month because I didn't want a relationship again. Trust me on this one, don't do it.
R.I.P. Jeb
07/31/08

FREEZER BURN s YELLOWFRIZBEE
#36
Quote by rigiddigits
If she broke up with you out of guilt because you were putting in more effort than she was, then trying even harder (although out of context it's an awesome gesture) won't help I don't think. It's okay to feel like you'd do anything for a girl, but you don't have to show it that much. If you're bending over backwards to please her and she's not prepared to reciprocate then you need to stop doing it if you want things to change. Do you guys talk at all, currently?

yeah actually lately we have been talking, she contacted me on facebook, telling me how sorry she was for treating me the way she did and told me the real reason for breaking up with me and explaining to me that shes changed alot.
#37
To titsmcgee;

Got that right =/

I'm just sort of confused right now... I've been single for 9 months, and I really want a girlfriend right now, and the one who I really thought was special (she's amazingly gorgeous, and she has that quirky-nerdy-sexy personality to boot) pretty much shot me down.

I'm going to go live in a cave. I'll take my guitars, my skateboard, and a hustler mag. There I will live for the rest of my days.
#40
Oh well, it sucks but mopin' ain't gonna do **** for your situation. Find a new crush.