A guitarist first date and other assorted techniques for breaching a girl's pants

#1
OK UG, my friend, whom is on this site, is going on a first date tomorrow with a chick that really digs his fly self.


Anyway, as the title implies, what would be your best "pickup lines" and other techniques to get right into it.


And perhaps, certain tips to get "her" from this

to this


to, eventually, this

Btw, please, I understand there is already a relationship thread, and maybe a pickup line thread too
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#4
First off: LMFAO for the post hahaha
2. Improv a light and funny song all about her with your geet! (well i guess it can be heavy too if she's into that)
3. Be nice, and once you get her into bed, FIRST eat her out until she pulls you up to do her and then get it on. that's how she'll go from to to
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#6
"So i herd you liek penis..."
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#8
How about something actually witty?
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that post was Full OF WIN!!1!1




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#11
How about continuing the flow of conversation, using basic observational humor/wit?

If all else fails, "does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"
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This is honestly the best first post I've ever seen


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#12
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oh, you mean like not planning things to say on a date beforehand?


#13
How about don't try and get into her pants on the first date?


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#14
"Me, you, sex, NOW!!!!"

"My penis is cold, can i warm it up inside your vagina?"

uhhh thats all i got
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#15
Quote by dancesisidance
How about don't try and get into her pants on the first date?


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#16
"Are you a chicken farmer? You're good at rasing cocks."

Now, seriously. You guys may not function on the same basis as I do, but on a first date, play it cool and show her utmost respect. A simple yet effective way to do this is just to not stare at her chest; if you make a special effort not to (and, well, don't), she'll notice.

oh and no asking for sex on a first date. Or, for that matter, EVER. It'll only worsen things.

EDIT: Wow, here's a testament to how popular UG is. As soon as I finished my post, at least 5 others had happened. o_O
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Last edited by RPBiohazard at Jan 28, 2009,
#17
Quote by RPBiohazard
"Are you a chicken farmer? You're good at rasing cocks."

Now, seriously. You guys may not function on the same basis as I do, but on a first date, play it cool and show her utmost respect. A simple yet effective way to do this is just to not stare at her chest; if you make a special effort not to (and, well, don't), she'll notice.

oh and no asking for sex on a first date. Or, for that matter, EVER. It'll only worsen things.


Asking for sex. That is so old fashioned.
#18
Quote by dancesisidance
How about don't try and get into her pants on the first date?


boo!!

i don't know what guitar has to do with going on a first date, if you really want to include your guitar just play banana pancakes, it's what werks for me
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#19
Quote by dancesisidance
How about don't try and get into her pants on the first date?


Hahahahahahahaahahahahahaahahahahahaaha!

Oh I thought you were joking...
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#20
Oh my, i had no idea my friend was oh-so-very interested in helping me with my dating habits.

You only have one lifetime. USE IT!!!

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#22
if he is going on a date with the girl, he should be past pickup lines. observe:

"wow, this pasta is good!"
"yea baby, is that a mirror in your pocket, cause i can see myself in your pants."

"i thought rosario dawson was really good in that film."
"yea baby, ill rosario your dawson."

do you see what im getting at?
.
..
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I have no opinion on this matter.
#23
Quote by xChristgrindeRx
You could tell him to arrive with the "Guitarists Finger Better" shirt on.


Dude that's freaking awesome.

You only have one lifetime. USE IT!!!

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We Rock Out With Our Cocks Out!:UG Naked Club
#24
Quote by masturnate42
boo!!

i don't know what guitar has to do with going on a first date, if you really want to include your guitar just play banana pancakes, it's what werks for me


Thats probably the best suggestion in this thread sadly haha
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#27
Just remember that the only reason she is on a date with you is because she wants to get in your pants as fast as possible. Remember that and you'll do fine.
#28
If you were a new mcdonalds burger, id name you Mcbeautiful. Works EVERYTIME. i swear
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#29
the only trick involved in this situation is knowing how to read people and telling them what they want to hear, the only way to get good at this is through practice.
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#30
don't ask for sex, ask for some dome(head). just be all like: "so, i heard you really suck at giving dome(head)". then she'll be all like "no way, i'm so awesome at giving dome(head)".

95% of the time, it works everytime.
#31
yo dawg i herd you like penis so we put a penis in yo vagina so yo can have sex when yo having sex
#32
Quote by favljms
yo dawg i herd you like penis so we put a penis in yo vagina so yo can have sex when yo having sex


Oh ****...

Go away...
#33
Quote by mr.happyman
don't ask for sex, ask for some dome(head). just be all like: "so, i heard you really suck at giving dome(head)". then she'll be all like "no way, i'm so awesome at giving dome(head)".

95% of the time, it works everytime.


yeah that works on 95% of whores, but you still have to pay them afterwards 95% of the time.
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#34
Quote by mr.happyman
don't ask for sex, ask for some dome(head). just be all like: "so, i heard you really suck at giving dome(head)". then she'll be all like "no way, i'm so awesome at giving dome(head)".

95% of the time, it works everytime.


60%* if you're trying to make a subtle Anchorman quote.

And instead of not trying to get into her pants, just show up to her door with your pants around your ankles, now that, works.
#35
Quote by Kid_Thorazine
yeah that works on 95% of whores, but you still have to pay them afterwards 95% of the time.


You pay them? I thought you were suposed to kill them??? I'm confused?!?!?!?!?!

i'd try either:
1. dick in the box
2. wanna play lion? it's where you get on your hands and knees and i swing my meat around
3. be the nice guy and don't try anything unless you know she wants it, and most girls don't on the first date (based on the assumption that she is a high school girl)