#1
Here's a happy "STRUCTURED" song by my band ForgetMeNot!

Crit4Crit, link please!

Please supply a decent crit.
PSN: RokkstarX
Live: RokkyX

All my original (C4C) material is located here.
#2
Way too repetitive.
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Last edited by Gyroscope : Tomorrow at 01:00 PM.
#3
Quote by Gyroscope
Way too repetitive.


What he said.
Lead guitarist of a band which has no name

 N
#4
The bass and rhythm parts are pretty awful. Do something besides straight 8th notes. The lead is interesting but repetitive, it gets boring after a while. I'd also slow it down, but that would be part of writing a more interesting/melodic bass line.
#5
Honestly, for its genre I think it's fine. The acoustic riff could use some variation in places as a transition, but other than it's fine for what it is. I'm not a big fan of this kind of music, so I don't have much else to say.
- FJ

Quote by Landover Baptist Church
If you find [balloons in his bedroom], it is a sign that Satan may have taken your child by the hand and skipped off together to see the movie, Up without your knowledge.


#6
Quote by flyingjew34
Honestly, for its genre I think it's fine. The acoustic riff could use some variation in places as a transition, but other than it's fine for what it is. I'm not a big fan of this kind of music, so I don't have much else to say.


that doesn't say whether or not its good on its own merits... its boring and repetitive and only serves as a backing track for good vocals. so if the point of your band is to showcase the singer, sure go ahead. as a piece of music, its not so great.
#7
it's not that bad!!
just make it shorter and put a decent guitar solo, and somekind of a transition between the chorus and the verses, maybe change what the acoustic guitar is doing a little at some parts (to avoid repetition)...and it will be fine
or u can live it the way it is if u have a really catchy intersting meaningfull vocals

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1056844
#8
dude....

i know its pop punk

and it is a repetitive genre and all

but have the guitars do something else once in awhile!

the acoustic guitar, played the same thing. the whole time!

LITERALLY!

it butchered the what would be catchy riff to pieces

i dont think even vocals could fix this

i suggest major revision.

you can keep the intro and chorus

but i suggest changing the verse so that its different

then get a decent solo to make it interesting

just to break the repetition!

anyway..

like it is now, 3/10

the stuff is good, but thats all there is.

edit: im sorry if i came off too harsh man...
Last edited by ninja.kitty at Feb 3, 2009,
#9
Catchy progression, although it gets boring really fast. As everybody else has said, I think you should add some variation to the acoustic guitar. Also, The whole song is based in the same chord progression, so you may want to come up with some other chords for the prechorus, interlude etc. keep working on it.


Mind critting mine? ( new one in sig) Thanks.