Page 1 of 6
#1
Pretty sure this hasn't been done here before. Post awesome images of things actually handed in as assignments at school. For some reason these really make me laugh really hard
Note: large images, thread may be messed a little
You have to read the whole thing on a lot of them, but it's definitely worth it.
I'll start off;



Last edited by connor045 at Feb 4, 2009,
#2
Old, but still funny

EDIT: to make a contribution...
Quote by drunkinkoala
you can be jesus.


Quote by Wesseem
most useless response i think i have ever seen on any forum ever.


Quote by Turkeyburger





Lolflag
Last edited by hell_monkey at Feb 4, 2009,
#5
Wth wierd stuff?
ಠ_ಠ WILL GIVE HEAD

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Have to give you props that the funniest post I read in a while
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hazardmaster has won this thread.


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#6
damn this post is bad timing. my school just had midterms and now i threw out all of my funny papers.
#8
lol at the first one getting a 100%. I have to try that last one.
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#9
"No. There is an elephant in the way.

lol
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#10
Quote by drunkinkoala
you can be jesus.


Quote by Wesseem
most useless response i think i have ever seen on any forum ever.


Quote by Turkeyburger





Lolflag
#11
Gah...why can i be this smart?

oh wait..b/c i like money..and doing that crap makes my money go Poof!
#12
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#13
This is a win thread, but every single funny school paper I've ever seen online has already been posted.
#14


win.
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I tried it out in store.

Great neck, nice n light, good tuning stability. Overall a good guitar. I didn't but it cause I generally only buy guitars over a grand now.
#16
I had to bring a draft of a paper to my English class yesterday, so naturally I started working on it at 2 AM that morning. After a couple hours, it became apparent that I would not be able to finish it as I had chosen a poor topic, and rather than rewrite it, I decided to fill the remainder of the paper with crap.

It was supposed to be on this essay written by this James Loewen guy, and how the way history is taught in schools, embellishing heroic accomplishments while leaving out unsavory events (heroification) undermines the foundation of democracy. Here is the last page or so (before that it is boring):


Loewen’s essay is highly enlightening in regards to the oft-omitted parts of history, and he makes a compelling case for his argument. However, I think he stops way the **** too soon. If people don’t know stuff, they will make stupid choices in the voting booth, and then we get dip****s like Bush and Cheney for another four years, after they spent the first four lying and ****.

Some people might say that heroification doesn’t undermine democracy, but they would be wrong. And that is my counter-argument. Because I had to have one.

At this point you can probably tell that I am no longer taking this assignment seriously. You are right. Unless you weren’t thinking that, which means that you’re probably a bit dim. I’ve come to the conclusion that this paper just isn’t going to work, but I don’t have time to redo it since it’s coming up on 5 AM, not to mention the fact that I have a math midterm tomorrow. I’m just trying to make it to five pages so I’ll have something to show in class, and later I’ll write a whole new essay about a topic that I might actually find interesting and not have to sit in front of my computer for ten hours, trying to convince myself to start the paper. Sorry. I’m kind of a failure, as well as a chronic procrastinator. I’ve been full of B.S. for this entire essay. I don’t even think that the United States is truly a democracy, except maybe in the most general sense. Sorry you had to read all this drivel. I’d bake you a cookie to thank you for your time, but I don’t have a cookie sheet. Or ingredients.

The end. Of my really bad paper. I’ll write a better one soon, I promise. And it won’t involve Darth Vader. Well, maybe a little, but it will be relevant.

Sorry, trees, for wasting you.


BTW, "Darth Vader" refers to a previous paper I had written on him for the same class. Which I now have to re-write.

I think my professor hates me.
kill all humans
Last edited by alaskan_ninja at Feb 4, 2009,
#18
I had my CAHSEE exam yesterday and I had to write an essay... I wrote You, Lost, The, Game in the beginning of every paragraph. In the end I had to write a little paragraph for them to read the beginning of every paragraph because it was supposed to be a 5 Paragraph Essay... I wonder how I did.
#21
My english teacher said "Write an essay." So here's what I wrote

Horses: Bane of the Country

What has four hooves, a long face and is relentlessly bent on world domination? If you answered anything but horses or Carrot Top, you are wrong. Horses are a threat that has long gone unnoticed and their continuous presence proves they are up to something. Horses also use subtle acts of mischief to help accomplish their nefarious goals. Finally, horses are quite dangerous creatures. It is through ways such as these that horses would be able to achieve world domination if left to their own means.

Horses have been around for a really long time. For centuries they have been used for jobs that were difficult for humans to do such as plowing fields, carrying soldiers into battle, and competing in horse races. Yet in today’s modern age we have technologies available that are much better at the jobs horses had. An example of this is the tractors that can plow fields much quicker then horses could and don't poop everywhere and/or eat large amounts of grains a day. Racing horses were also replaced by marathon runners who are just as fast and eat large amounts of grain but make up for it by not pooping everywhere. Despite having very little if any real purpose in today’s world horses have managed to trick people into keeping them around by doing tricks like jumping over things and counting. With no real purpose left for horses they are finally able to focus all their energy on scheming their little horsey schemes and continuing to wait for the perfect moment to strike and unleash their hoofed vengeance upon the world.

Horses commit many acts of mischief that go widely overlooked by the general population. When a horse poops on the road, sure people are mildly disgusted but that's about it. When a person poops on the road everyone is shouting lawsuit this and public indecency that. Now I'm sure you're saying “Hold up now, they're just a dumb animal. They don't know what they're doing”. This is where you are wrong. According to Wikipedia “horses excel at simple learning, but also are able to solve advanced cognitive challenges”. So they know fully well what they're doing. They know they're dropping a smelly land mine with hopes some poor person on a Moped will hit it, causing him/her to lose balance and be flung into the solid pavement/scratchy gravel. If horses continue to be allowed to get away with such tomfoolery it's only a matter of time before they realize they are above the law and move on to such crimes as arson, murder, shoplifting, and ringing the doorbells on random people’s houses then running away. This is why we must crack down on these horses' acts of mischief while they're still small.

Finally, Horses are very dangerous creatures. When they are on the road they are a hazard in a few different ways. Their slower speed causes them to obstruct traffic and depending on the weather they can cause severe accidents. They also can trample and innocent pedestrians. Now you may say “Cars can hit you. Why is a horse trampling you any different?” If that's the case you certainly talk a lot when no ones around. When a car hits you its boom, thump, done. A horse can step on you as many times as they see fit. Also, say you anger a driver. If you run off the road he can't very well go run you down in his car. Such is not the case with a horse. If you upset one, leaving the road won't help you any. It can chase you down and kick you in the face with a fierce determination like no car has. Horses can even swim which means no where is safe if these neighing menaces decide to attack. Those are just a few of the reasons of why horses are dangerous critters.

There you have it, A few reasons why horses could take over the world if we don't put a stop to their actions. They have proven that they can appear useful enough for people to keep them around for a long time. They are mischievous animals whose actions are dismissed as mere stupidity. Lastly, they are dangerous creatures which could wreak much havoc. It is by those reasons that horses are a threat to our very society.
667 The neighbor of the beast


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#22
that paper on walt whitman is win

the horse paper above me is pure win
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Last edited by Lethal Dosage at Feb 4, 2009,
#24
Some of those were pretty hilarious.

I got a good chuckle out of the Giraff at the end of the test paper.
#25
Quote by Brownie2
Some of those were pretty hilarious.

I got a good chuckle out of the Giraff at the end of the test paper.


I laughed more at the fact that the teacher actually gave him a bonus point for it.


That horse paper made me LOL hard though
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#28
Quote by connor045


it's so sad he actually tried correcting him!
Last edited by dethead666 at Feb 4, 2009,
#29
I wrote a paper for my Thought and Writing 1050 class about the first time I got REALLY high in the style of Gonzo Journalism. I got 100% on it!
#30
hahahaha

god i love you all that i could anal you all...
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#31
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#33
Quote by Beakwithteeth
Incredibly fail

Meh, I found it a couple of years ago and had it saved. I thought it was pretty funny.
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#34
^ It looked sorta staged to me tbh.
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#35
Oh ****, I need to post my essay on Bob from Enzyte.

I'll post it tomorrow.
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#37
Lmfao, i love how he lies about his name and purposely adds a loski to the teachers name. God this thread is ****ing money.
#38
My physics teacher gives some funny answers to multiple choice questions...I can't remember any of the questions and no longer have the pics but some of the answers on his test you can choose are: "It will blow up.", " E: All of the above answers are armed and should be considered dangerous.", "D: E is false, E: D is true.", "I don't know the answer...leave me alone."
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#39
Quote by Hellish_Wolf
My physics teacher gives some funny answers to multiple choice questions...I can't remember any of the questions and no longer have the pics but some of the answers on his test you can choose are: "It will blow up.", " E: All of the above answers are armed and should be considered dangerous.", "D: E is false, E: D is true.", "I don't know the answer...leave me alone."

My science teacher freshman year in HS did the same thing!


...where do you go to school?
kill all humans
#40
Quote by connor045




...Anyone else notice that they misspelled "abstinence" on the worksheet?

The fuck is "absitnence?"
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