#1
Do you guys have a particular favourite urban myth that you'd like to share with the Pit? Like, one from your area/neighbourhood/school or just a tale that you reckon is cool? Post it here.
Quote by Cathbard
If all you had to go on was the forum you'd think a Decimator could cure noise caused by dodgey stage lighting and restock the ocean's population of sperm whales
#2
The trolls that live underneath the bridges...fun to use while watching the yungin's

Also, the one about the old lady who tried to dry to dog off in the microwave...
#3
If you can get balls deep in a chicken before it makes a noise you become their ruler and can order them to do your bidding
I've Made You A Drawing of a Giraffe Fucking an Elephant. Notice How His Moustache Looks Just Like Mine.

Your Mother's Got a Penis
#4
Theres this kid in a wheelchair in my school with one arm and on his stump is a little nub. People say that if you press it his head explodes.

Makes me laugh so much.
#5
Quote by Hot_Money420
Also, the one about the old lady who tried to dry to dog off in the microwave...


Did she steal it from someone's driveway?
Gibson Les Paul Custom Black Beauty
Tokai LC53 Les Paul Custom
Tokai ALS48 Love Rock Les Paul Standard
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Marshall 1936 2x12 Cabinet
#6
Quote by Johnny Trash
Did she steal it from someone's driveway?



i almost pissed myself.
Quote by brandonian
you nose started bleeding, so the first thing you do is post it on UG? i don't understand the reasoning behind that one my friend



Quote by unplugtheradio
screw grammar i practice economic typing.
#7
The Starbursts story.

Epiphone Les Paul Standard w/ SD Alnico Pro II's
Fender Aerodyne Telecaster & Stratocaster
Marshall JCM 800 4104 combo


E-Married to Funny_Page
#8
Quote by Johnny Trash
Did she steal it from someone's driveway?



I dunno...I just remember it from the movie Urban Legend...on that note...that movie sucked ASS!
#9
Quote by Hot_Money420
The trolls that live underneath the bridges...fun to use while watching the yungin's

Oh hell yes!

I wrote a metal song about trolls living under the bridge by my house while I was in Norway, it was called, "Trolls with metal hats".
#10
I like the one about the Cullen's not stepping foot on the indian reserve.
Quote by Bill43


I wouldn't know an Opeth song from an Egg McMuffin
#11
The one about my neighbour being murdered with a golf club in his home. Oh wait, that did happen like 3 years ago.
Quote by HuckIt
I didn't find it that funny when I saw myself doing him in missionary position...

Quote by Oblivion_Rps
I was having sex with a female dolphin. In the dream I was like:
"YEEEEEEEAAAARGH I'M SCREWIN' A FEMALE DOLPHIN!!!" and when I woke up I was like:
"... wtf"
#12
Bodies under the bed...

Imagin that, your screwing your missus, ignoring that disgusting smell in your hotel room, as you clean up afterwards...You see a mouldy dead body under your bed..

"JEEEEEZUZ, WE SCREWED ONTOP OF A DEAD BODY! THAT'S ALMOST NECRO-FUCKING-PHILIA!!!"
#13
My favourite is;

A 17-year-old boy, attempts suicide by jumping off the roof of his apartment building; this attempt became a "successful homicide" when he was accidentally shot by his mother as he fell past his own apartment window. His parents regularly argued and threatened each other with a shotgun that was normally kept unloaded. Unbeknownst to them, the boy had loaded the gun a few days earlier hoping they would make good on their threats to kill one another. As a result, he unwittingly became an accomplice in his own murder. The irony is that a newly installed protective netting for window washers on the building's exterior below their apartment, would have saved his life if he had not been hit by the shotgun blast that he himself had loaded.
#14
Star Trek.
Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who...
Quote by Necrophagist777
I'm ORION, LORD OF EVIL, give me your soul and breathe in my darkness.

YOU WILL NOT ENJOY THIS......
╭∩╮( º.º )╭∩╮
#15
Quote by 0RI0N
Star Trek.


I pretty much pissed my self laughing
GEAR
________

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Epiphone G400 Extreme
Marshall Mg30 Dfx (It does the job),
Kelry Sinister Strings, 10 - 52's
Dunlop Jazz III's or Dunlop purple 2.00 tortex(sharpened).
#16
Hook in the car door.
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#17
The bible.
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#18
Quote by wahappen
I like the one about the Cullen's not stepping foot on the indian reserve.


Kensai, I totally agree, by the way.
Please excuse my godawful username. I was thirteen.
#19
Quote by faultyy
If you can get balls deep in a chicken before it makes a noise you become their ruler and can order them to do your bidding




Some kid gets drunk/drugged up with strangers. Wakes up the next day in an ice bath with a note to get to a hospital. His kidneys have been stolen.

Girl on vacation meets a man and has an intense romantic fling over the week. He gives her a gift on her last day and says open it when she gets home. When she does, its a miniature coffin with a note that says "I have AIDS"

George Bush is a war criminal controlling vast numbers of evil imperialistic minions. Barack Obama is a pawn of the Antichrist.

Epiphones are better than Gibsons

The stupidest one I have ever heard came from my own family. I had a cat when my daughter was born, and I was told to get rid of the cat because they suck the breath out of newborn babies.
Bluegrass Rocks

CYNONYTE!

Quote by Basti95
People only come here to get sigged anyway


Quote by Basti95
Rats, I thought someone would sig it and make me famous...

it was going to be my big break

#20
Quote by Kensai
The bible.
D00d. You're so edgy!
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#22
My life.
Quote by Kensai
Ovenman, your contraptions make women's

clothes evaporate.
____________________


I WANT THE TWOOTH!

____________________________

Quote by aaciseric
That's far too clever to be posted in the Pit.
#23
That /b/ actually exists.
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#24
Quote by Thrasher51



I was really worried that no one other than a 13 yr old girl would get that.
Quote by Bill43


I wouldn't know an Opeth song from an Egg McMuffin
#25
the girl who stuck a hot dog up her virginia and when she tried to get it out with a shop vac, it pulled out her innards and she died.
#26
Quote by element4433
D00d. You're so edgy!


I'm a tr00 p0nx.

But really, it's true.
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#27
That a girl who used to go to a local school once was pleasuring herself with a test tube and it broke inside her, mid class.
#28
There's a lost episode of Blue Peter from the days when the IRA was still active where they teach you how to make a car bomb from materials in your garage.
I play by my own rules. And I have one rule; There are no rules... but if there are, they're there to be broken. Even this one.


Confused? Good.

Quote by CrucialGutchman
Sigs are wastes of my precious screen space.

^ Irony

Quote by RevaM1ssP1ss
LET ME HUMP YOU DAMMIT
#29
Quote by Greenie_777
Theres this kid in a wheelchair in my school with one arm and on his stump is a little nub. People say that if you press it his head explodes.

Makes me laugh so much.



sigged