Sorry for that long title.

I am asking for comments/critiques on this introduction I am working on to a new song. I have finally gotten out of my writers block and penned some decent meaningful lyrics, and musically I am beginning to branch out to some new sounds.

So far what I have is synthetic strings and flute. I also created a pretty great beat (I think). I have also sampled a quote by Aleister Crowley to kick it off and some distorted fire sounds. The majority of my inspiration from this song comes from Aleister Crowley's writings, so keep that in mind.

It can be found in my profile.

I am looking for meaningful comments and critiques, as well as your overall feelings about it so far. Also, I am having trouble composing the verses and such musically. If you would be interested in helping out that would be great (I would give you credit, obviously, with assisting in the songs composition).

Thanks! I will return the comment favor if you respond in a meaningful way.
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Hello. Thanks for responding to my thread.

I really like this, well done. I particularly like the way it seems at the beginning to be almost out of time, but it comes around and everything fits in very well. Reminds me of someone limping. I wish I had some constructive critique for you, but there really isn't anything I would change. (Well unless you could record it with real flute/strings :P) I quite liked the noises at the start, so you could maybe incorporate them into the rest more, but that might ruin the feel - it's hard to tell.
Very cool. The speaking at the beginning is interesting and sets the tone. The musical part of it's very atmospheric. It reminded me a bit of Fair to Midland, a band I really like. As far as writing a verse I think it would be cool to just expand more on the intro(add vocals maybe?) and eventually build up into a more powerful chorus.

crit mine?