Funny things you have done while half asleep or other means of forgetting

#1
Well, last night around 12:30 I was deep asleep and apparently my friend, Jacob called. Well I picked it up thinking it is my girlfriend calling me on her way to school because I have not taken the time to look around for the time or my surroundings or anything. So I put the phone up to my ****ed up ear and say "Hi baby" and I hear talking and just say "Okay baby" at every pause. I end the conversation by saying "Bye baby, I love you." I hang up and it says ended conversation with Jacob and I'm just like ah well, then I fall back asleep in like three seconds. So today I'm walking into school and think about it and I remember it like a dream pretty much. So I call him and he tells me I was being pretty gay last night and I was like **** that actually happened.

Any funny stories that are similar to this where you forgot or something?
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#2
When I was like six I tried to take a piss in the room across the hall from the bathroom.

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#4
i squirted KY in my friends ear on a camping trip. he then proceeded to beat up my other friend thinking it was me. needless to say, much alcohol was involved.
#7
once, I got really stoned, and wrote an essay on waffles instead of doing my French homework. I forgot about it until the teacher was collecting it.
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#8
apparently, during various nights, i've: nudged my girlfriend awake and said nothing, start crying, started talking about prime numbers and fetched a glass of water and i don't remember any of it.

>.<
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#9
I used to go get food out of my fridge and eat it then leave it out to rot
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#10
Quote by iantheman
once, I got really stoned, and wrote an essay on waffles instead of doing my French homework. I forgot about it until the teacher was collecting it.


I once got stoned and wrote how much I love masturbation. I remember that though.
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#11
Quote by iantheman
once, I got really stoned, and wrote an essay on waffles instead of doing my French homework. I forgot about it until the teacher was collecting it.


Did you hand it in? lol, I would love to hear what they had to say about it.

Sometimes my parents ask me questions when I just wake up to get a laugh. One time they asked what time it was, and with glazed over eyes I turned to the clock and looked and said "6 99" which was met with laughter.
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#12
Once a couple friends were staying over, and apparently me and one of the others had a conversation about the time, that bassically went:

Me: Tucker... Tucker what time is it?

Tucker: Quarter... Noon..

Me:Tucker... TUCKER!! What time is it?

Tucker: No...

Then we both fell back asleep

Another story:

When i was like, 4, i slept walked into my grandparents room, picked up this large golden bowl that had like, change and keys and stuff in it, brought it into the kitchen, and tried to cut it with a large knife...

Another time when a friend was staying the night, apparently i talk about slaughtering people in my sleep... When i learned this, it scared me...

Pit, im scared of myself
#13
Apparently when I was really young i got up and walked in my parents room during the night and said,

I forgot to tell you something.

Then went back to bed.


Wierd.
#14
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#15
I once had a half asleep/slap happy/ stoned conversation about wondering if inbred people and retards had souls. And how funny those ghosts would be.
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#16
When i was younger, my uncle liked to tease me. So about when i was 5, i was at his house staying over the weekend, and he was telling a me a story about the chocolate fairy. He told me that if i baked cookies and set out a jug of Apple Juice, the fairy would come in the middle of the night and leave a chocolate bunny under your pillow. So i did all of that and went to my bedroom and lied in my bed, giggling like a school girl for about a hour. I heard a sound and awoke to find that the fairy had just stepped out of the room and realized that i had just missed her. I reached under the pillow, reach for my chocolate bunny, and there it was! I was so happy that i began to choke it down faster than a race horse at the Kentucky Derby. I woke up the next morning and told my uncle that i had gotten my chocolate and he just stood there, laughing at me. When i asked him why he was laughing at me, all he said was, "That was some mighty fine horse crap that you slobbered all over last night. Good eats that is."
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#17
lol, just the other night I must have gotten extra cold cos I woke up in my be wearing two layers of clothes - two shirts, two hoodies and two pairs of tracksuit bottoms...yeah I have no idea

a) How that even happened
or
b) How I forgot about it :S
#18
My brother and I shared a house for almost a year....I could tell when he came home drunk cuz I'd be sitting at my computer and smell food burning....He'd always throw something like pizza or french fries in the oven cuz he'd be hungry, but then he'd pass out before the food was ready, causing it to burn, causing the smoke detector to go off, causing me to wake up.

It always sucked cuz it's like "Yay, food I didn't have to buy/cook" but then it'd be charred like a hockey puck.
#19
Quote by angus is god
I once had a half asleep/slap happy/ stoned conversation about wondering if inbred people and retards had souls. And how funny those ghosts would be.


the real question is would these souls be retarded.
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#20
I once went to sleep in boxers and pants and I woke up and scratched my leg and I screamed "where the ****s my pants!"

They were in the middle of my bedroom floor
#21
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When i was younger, my uncle liked to tease me.


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#22
I imagined God was real. Man was I confused
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#23
Recently I fell asleep with my girlfriend, and apparently she can't sleep next to me because I move extensively. Amidst this, she heard be laughing and saying "****" during my sleep. Pretty amusing.
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#24
Months ago, my boyfriend and I were down the pub and got were being annoyed by a couple. This woman was talking to me for a full 20mins about beetroot. She kept going on and on and on. She also tried to tell me that cos' I'm a biker, I'm an *rsehole on the road. She had us both pissed off.

So that night, when I was asleep [this is all according to my boyfriend] I woke up shouting about bike vs car riders/drivers and other random stuff. When he tries to talk to me [or shut me up] I shouted at him "WELL I'M NOT JUST GONNA LAY HERE AND DIE OF BEETROOT!" ... I talk alot in my sleep... this is just one that really made me laugh..
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#25
When I was younger I used to dream about going to toilet, but when I woke up my bet was all wet...
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