#1
Redneck Love
Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
And I'm so lucky to have
a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like corn silk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
Well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
What I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape,
yo're there fer yore man,
To patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
We go together
like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men,
they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
From the cooler at Kroger.
That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
More useful than diamonds......
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!
#2
I don't understand... Is it supposed to be funny or your song, I don't get it.
If life gives you oranges, say "f*ck oranges" and bail.

Hey You!
#5
Just a funny poem I ran across. I thought it would seriously grate the grammar nazis for one and maybe entertain others...
#6
Quote by n2dablue
Redneck Love
Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
And I'm so lucky to have
a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like corn silk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.
On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
Well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
What I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape,
yo're there fer yore man,
To patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.
Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
We go together
like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men,
they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
From the cooler at Kroger.
That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
More useful than diamonds......
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!


Don't be fuckin talking about where I live.

Also your name has the grammar nazis "grating"
#7
Quote by n2dablue
Just a funny poem I ran across. I thought it would seriously grate the grammar nazis for one and maybe entertain others...


I don't see where the funny or entertain parts are involved.
If life gives you oranges, say "f*ck oranges" and bail.

Hey You!
#8
Last line?

Is this supposed to be a 'Oh lord, I just read the whole thing and realised at the end I have been trolled, whatever shall I do?' Like a Bel-Air story?
RULE BRITANNIA
#10
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Last line?

Is this supposed to be a 'Oh lord, I just read the whole thing and realised at the end I have been trolled, whatever shall I do?' Like a Bel-Air story?

A trolling motor is a motor used on fishing boats.

I found it kinda funny.
Quote by herby190
Every thread I've seen you in has been a complete success. Yay you!

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i'm voting for GNiCk89. i just like how he speaks TO me, not AT me.

Quote by \m/Angus\m/
Yea, Sublime is a great band. You have an Underoath icon, so I think your opinion doesn't matter.
#11
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
Last line?

Is this supposed to be a 'Oh lord, I just read the whole thing and realised at the end I have been trolled, whatever shall I do?' Like a Bel-Air story?

A trolling motor:

usually used on bass boats. This is NOT a "trolling" post.
#12
New Skynyrd single?
Quote by duncang
maybe it's because i secrely agree that tracedin inymballsackistheb best album ever


he's got the fire and the fury,
at his command
well you don't have to worry,
if you hold onto jesus' hand
#14
Quote by n2dablue
A trolling motor:

usually used on bass boats. This is NOT a "trolling" post.


I lol'd
#16
^^^ NO! No more memes Godamit!

Quote by CTFOD
New Skynyrd single?


I lol'd
If life gives you oranges, say "f*ck oranges" and bail.

Hey You!
Last edited by ThinLizzyFan at Feb 17, 2009,
#17
Quote by dullsilver_mike
Someone is going to shoop this and turn it into a meme that pops up whenever someone is trolling the pit...


At least I certainly hope so.

You can't call it you tool!
Quote by guitar-godfrey
when i grow up i wanna have blackandsilver's babies!

Quote by angusfan16

Quote by Scowmoo
..
HOLY HELL.

nice discovery, sir.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last edited by coryklok : Today at 01:10 PM.
#18
Blue Collar Comedy has been a huge stain on the comedy world and America in general.
Poor advice.
#19
Quote by dullsilver_mike
Someone is going to shoop this and turn it into a meme that pops up whenever someone is trolling the pit...


At least I certainly hope so.


I really am sorry. I could think of nothing else.

🙈 🙉 🙊
#20

electric trolling motor is now a meme
*forces meme*
yea ****ty shop is a ****ty shop
Quote by nincompoop
potcorn56, you are a god.
#21
Stop with the memes!
If life gives you oranges, say "f*ck oranges" and bail.

Hey You!
#22



but really, that wasn't very funny.

i don't really like the whole redneck/blue collar comedy thing.
#24
Well, being from a place where rednecks are plentiful, i find the poem thing funny.

haha ha ha
::type i'm here to stir the $h!t

#25
That should be our state theme song.

(pssst. look at where i'm from)
Sail upon the open skies