#1
Was it such an awful thing to say?
a flawless assembly of lies at the slip of my tongue
the one mistake that I will never regret
I will never regret but my decision to let you fly past
my head that drips not red but blue with choking satisfaction
as you float into the sunset I'll follow but keep my distance safe
like the security I so depend on as I write away my problems
we'll always write away our problems
I'll be the notebook tucked so beautifully away
in that endless ocean of red and white decor
that carries the weight of all your problems
but walks for eternity a one lane street
not paved in gold but cheap slabs of marble
over a thick wooden frame stretched to the point
of destruction with labored breaths I'll try to speak
but the son of trees, God blessed them without a tongue,
but arms and leaves, I drape the scarf around your neck
Like a whisper holding you close in my own solitary, selfish mind
The earth turns gold, I cry out, oh the earth turns gold!
As you turn your back I have but one breath to ask,
Was it such an awful thing to say, to blame your treasures on the grass?
#2
This is excellent stuff. The way the images flow into the next is just beautiful. There is, unfortunately, very little for me to say that may help you, it really is pretty perfect.

I have no doubt that this one of the best pieces I have read on here in a long time.
#3
There was some potential here, I wouldn't totally agree with Dan's comment above though.

It read well, but the lack of any real structure, even grammatically, bothered me a little. I mean, yeah this formats fine, but there was very little (if any) awareness of how this sounds for the reader. I think if you're not going to use much structure, you need to use the words and sounds of those words to add something a little bit more to it. Bring in some subtle rhyming, some assonance, some internal rhymes. These things will all help it to become a stronger read, and more appealing to the ears.

For now, it was solid, but I switched off quickly. Keep it up.