#1


Dear diary, it appears as though I've stumbled on the common area of this site. The flora is effervescing a distinct aroma. The natives do not appear hostile. I will sally forth and inquire into the happenings of this majestic land.
#3
Dear Diary

Today that white devil who enslaved me made me carry his canoe on my back. A canoe! We haven't seen water in 3 months! Anyway, oh, and Mbembe is really pissing me off, other than that, a normal day.

With regards.

Quote by hazzmatazz
youmakemesmile...

Quote by sebastian_96
Today I stole a girls tampons for being such an annoying bitch.





MUFC


My love for you
Is like a truck
Berserker.
#4
Dear diary, a native has begun to communicate to me. I think he comes in peace. Perhaps we may form a bond of sorts, and this will be my entry into this strange and exotic land.
#6
Quote by Nigel Treadwell
Dear diary, a native has begun to communicate to me. I think he comes in peace. Perhaps we may form a bond of sorts, and this will be my entry into this strange and exotic land.

Are you perhaps related to Timothy Treadwell?
#7
Dear diary, I do not understand their attempts at communication. I have been accused of being someone named Timothy Treadwell. I think this may be their deity, and they think I have come, as if to fulfill some prophecy set in motion ages hence.
#8
Quote by Nigel Treadwell
Dear diary, I do not understand their attempts at communication. I have been accused of being someone named Timothy Treadwell. I think this may be their deity, and they think I have come, as if to fulfill some prophecy set in motion ages hence.

Might as well. May I have your hat, please?
#9
Dear diary,

The boy at school I like finally noticed me today, it feels like i'm drifting on a cloud.

*sigh*

I wish this feeling would last forever. Tomorrow, I'll try speaking to him again, I hope he talks back.

rip dime
The will be heartache,
there will be rain,
and joy I can't explain.
#12
Dear diary, today a native gave me a can of spray he calls "Troll Spray." There seem to be vile creatures in our midst, and this is some sort of repellent. But I fear their primitive minds overestimate the use of this spray; that it has only a symbolic importance in their local mythology. I will use it, though, to please them.
#13
Dear Diary

Today a man emerged from outside of our forums. He seemed passive, and spent most of the time watching us from the treeline. He seems positively fascinated by our ways. We shall keep a close eye on him, and hope he brings us gifts.

Quote by hazzmatazz
youmakemesmile...

Quote by sebastian_96
Today I stole a girls tampons for being such an annoying bitch.





MUFC


My love for you
Is like a truck
Berserker.
#15
Dear Diary,

From my perch in the trees I have spied a strange man walking into the village clearing. He seems to be trying to gain the trust of the others; one of them has presented him with something I can not make out.

Lets hope he is still there by the time I get back, lest he is eaten by trolls.
Member of the official GB&C "Who to Listen to" list
Quote by handbanana
wiliscool is just plain dumb
#16
Dear Diary,

I have seen several people communicating with a new comer in an attractive hat. I long for his hat with every fibre of my being. Tomorrow I shall attempt to communicate with him and perhaps gain access to the wonderous hat. If that fails I may have to steal it instead and leave the corpse in a ditch.
WARUM TUT ES WEH, WENN ICH PINKLE?!
Quote by goest
I'm going to take this opportunity to initiate my campaign to replace the phrase "Taking a shit" with "Busting a grumpy."


Quote by Axelfox
Disregard that,i suck cocks.
#17
Dear Diary,
Since you and I are going to be great friends, I will start by telling you about myself. My name is Anne Frank. I am twelve years old. I was born in Germany on the twelfth of June, nineteen twenty-nine. As my family is Jewish, we emigrated to Holland when Hitler came to power.


Rip dime.
RULE BRITANNIA
#18
Quote by Zero-Hartman
Dear Diary

Today that white devil who enslaved me made me carry his canoe on my back. A canoe! We haven't seen water in 3 months! Anyway, oh, and Mbembe is really pissing me off, other than that, a normal day.

With regards.



hahahahaha!

James you are the on the witty side of funny for sure
#19
Dear diary...
Yo, I'm rugged,
My camel's got the three-wheel motion,
Every word I say you want to put it to your quotient,
ZANZABAR,
Raised by the wolves,
Oxford education as phrased by the wolves,

My khaki shirt tucked into my tight khaki pants,
I drink too much and do my white wacky dance,
To hell with that I'm a man without shame,
Listen to the howls on the wind there's my name,
ZANZABAR!


...anyone?
Member of the Laney Cult
#22
Quote by hippotato7
hahahahaha!

James you are the on the witty side of funny for sure

I hope that's not sarcasm

Quote by hazzmatazz
youmakemesmile...

Quote by sebastian_96
Today I stole a girls tampons for being such an annoying bitch.





MUFC


My love for you
Is like a truck
Berserker.
#24
Quote by hippotato7
heck no!



*to the MR thread*

Quote by hazzmatazz
youmakemesmile...

Quote by sebastian_96
Today I stole a girls tampons for being such an annoying bitch.





MUFC


My love for you
Is like a truck
Berserker.
#26
Dear Diary,

I can feel his eyes on me again. When I turn away from my work i catch him quickly looking away, pretending to be deep in thought. Is he spending any time on the Case? It's the little things like always getting the tea on time, the Tips of that silly cap more often, and the winking of an eye at even the smallest of my epiphany. Its becoming increasingly difficult to concentrate now a days, ever since He cast me a loving glance at the discovery, that my gunshot wound at the hands of that Winter fellow, was just a flesh wound. Now I must return to this case before that awkward look enters my brain and halts my fading concentration.

sincerely, Dr. Watson
#29
Quote by Cobain_Is_King
I nearly lol'd


fair enough, I wrote a similar but possibly better version but alas at the very end, my computer crashed. I sat there in disbelief for ten minutes
#30
Dear Diary
I put off the 3rd of my regular daily wanks for 5 minutes to take a stroll through the Pit.
I could have been on 4 by now. What a waste.


RIP Dime
#31
Dear diary, I have just woken from a night of horrid slumber. The sounds of the natives guitar sounds are shrill and harsh to the ears. One young man was bending on a string and bending higher and higher until my head nearly exploded.
#32
Quote by Nigel Treadwell
Dear diary, I have just woken from a night of horrid slumber. The sounds of the natives guitar sounds are shrill and harsh to the ears. One young man was bending on a string and bending higher and higher until my head nearly exploded.


He must have been using the ancient tribal art of whammying without a whammy bar.
#33
Dear diary
Today, I demonstrated how to whammy without a whammy bar, using my favourite fret(the 12th). Then I proceeded to record a video of myself showing a sort of 'barbarian low attack' that could be used with an axe, or maybe a sword. I had a cool sound effect for it, too.
It was the best day ever.


EDIT> dammit
#34
Dear Diary,

Why must Mulbambe insist on playing Guitar Hero?

He is a poser, and should be exiled from the tribe.
Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
#39
Dear Diary,

I went to the doctor today and found out I have ADD. The doctor gave my mom some pil
#40
Dear Diary:

Mood: Apathetic.

My life is spiraling downward.
I couldn't get enough money to go to the
Blood Red Romance and Suffocate me dry concert.
It sucks 'cause they play some of my favorite songs
like "Stab My Heart Because I Love You" and
"Rip Apart My Soul" and of course,
"Stabby Rip Stab Stab".
And it doesn't help that I couldn't
get my hair to do that flippy thing either.
Like that guy from that band can do.
Some days ugh...

My life is just a black abyss,
you know, it's so dark.
And it's suffocating me.
Grabbing hold of me and tightening it's grip,
tighter than a pair of
my little sister's jeans...
which look great on me by the way.

My parents just don't get me, you know.
They think I'm gay just because
they saw me kiss a guy.
Well, a couple guys. But I mean, it's the 2000's.
Can't 2 ... or 4 dudes make-out with
each other without being gay?
I mean, chicks dig that kind of thing anyways.
I don't know diary,
sometimes I think you're the only one that gets me,
you're my best friend...
I feel like tacos...
"This is Sierra-259, you got Spartans on the ground, sir. We're not going anywhere."

Fender Partscaster

Vox AC4TV

Korg Pitchblack Tuner
TC Electronics Nova Repeater
Electro Harmonix Big Muff Pi
MXR Micro Amp
EH Holy Grail Reverb