#1
Since everyone is recording music at home in their bedrooms and bathrooms using amateur gear, and nobody apparently needs pro studios and high-end gear anymore, as a surgeon I have decided to take a similar approach. I now suggest everyone do brain surgery at home for fun and profit.

I'm not very technical but I just love doing brain surgery. I couldn't see wasting all that time to get an undergraduate degree in science, then wasting four more years in medical school and another three or so as a resident, but I'm sure that I can make up for the deficit with my enthusiasm and my love of brain surgery.

First of all, you really don't need to be in a big fancy building like a hospital. I use my ping-pong table in the basement to do my surgery. (I do throw a plastic sheet over it to preserve the paint). By doing it at home, I save on rent. I admit that sometimes the neighbors complain about the occasional screams that they hear, especially late at night.

Next thing is the equipment. They have all of that shiny stuff in the operating room and believe me, you don't really need it. I equipped my Operating Room at my local 99 cent store. At the hardware department, pick up a hack saw. This is very handy for cutting off the top of the skull. If you want to get fancy, pick up a cross-cut saw, for emergencies. A good claw hammer is handy for removing any extra bone that you missed with the saws.

Move on to the housewares department. Here, for $.99, you can get a whole set of steak knives. These are very sharp and they are good for the fine work. For the rough work--get a bread knife.

In the sewing department, you can pick up a sewing kit with all kinds of needles and different colored threads. This is handy to sew the scalp back in place. You can also get a set of three different-sized scissors. Sometimes they come in handy. There! For $7 to $8, you can completely equip your operating room.

On TV, you see the OR full of assistants. This is a waste of space. If you really watch them, they are all just standing around doing nothing. In my home operating room, I have eliminated all of these unnecessary people. I do, however, engage the family dog to sit under my operating table to clean up the scraps.

You see how simple it is to do brain surgery at home? Anyone with a love of brain surgery can do it. I never read Grey's Anatomy although I did see a copy once. Very nice pictures but half of it was in Latin. Who wants to bother with that! If you really want to be a brain surgeon, all you need is the desire and enthusiasm. My prices are very low since I don't have all that stupid overhead.

ANYONE NEED TO HAVE A BRAIN TUMOR REMOVED? CALL ME.
Last edited by Lumiere Rouge at Feb 24, 2009,
#6
Quote by metaldud536
ITT: Rant about how only rich people should make music.


Or how about only those who can actually PLAY and know how to RECORD should make music.
#7
Quote by metaldud536
ITT: Rant about how only rich people should make music.



Word up home cakes
UG's HIPPIE
#8
Advertising. GTFO. Also, your home lacks sterility (I'm humoring you, troll.)
I'm that dude with the fro.
Quote by angus fan16
Long story short, a whale flew out of the ocean, landed next to me and shot like a wall of water straight into my face.
#10
Quote by metaldud536
No.


That is why I love AmateurTools. It allows me to lie on my back in my bathtub at home and record a rock or metal album.
#12
Quote by Froboarder
Advertising. GTFO. Also, your home lacks sterility (I'm humoring you, troll.)


Ah yes, "troll". Stay long enough on any interwebz forum, engage in a few discussions, and sooner or later you will be called a nazi, troll or anti-semite. *YAWN*.

Apparently the true definition of "troll" is: anyone who says or does something you don't like or agree with.

Try something more original next time when you don't have something decent to say.
#13
Fuck you.


So what you´re saying is basically that only rich people should make music.
My gear:
  • Fender American Standard Telecaster
  • Ibanez RG450
  • Laney VC15
  • Electro Harmonix HOG
  • Vox Satchurator
  • Blackout Effectors Musket fuzz
  • Electro Harmonix Pulsar
  • Earthquaker Devices Disaster Transport
  • Malekko Chicklett

Last edited by Gord@k at Feb 24, 2009,
#14
Lame Troll is Lame.

I'll let you remove my brain tumor if you can give yourself a lobotomy.
Guitars:
Gibson Explorer - White
PRS SE Singlecut
Fender Acoustic

Amps:
Crate head w/ POD preamp
Crate 120 watt POS
Crate Cab
#15
Quote by Gord@k
Fuck you.


Hahahahaha. I think I know why.

How old are you by the way? You sounded like an offended squirrel. I suggest you jump back into your basement and continue doing whatever you were doing before posting your idiotic comment.
#17
Quote by SalemREIGN
Lame Troll is Lame.

I'll let you remove my brain tumor if you can give yourself a lobotomy.


Troll = anyone who says or does something you don't like or agree with. Right?

*DOUBLE YAWN*

If you think there is anything wrong with what I said, present proper counter-arguments instead of making juvenile insults.
#18
Yes, yes, we're all sick of teenagers with ten dollar microphones recording themselves and plastering their works on their myspaces. After several UG Albums, I've learned to tune these fuzzy creations out, allowing the ensuing white noise to lull me to sleep.
#19
because you are a good artist doesnt mean that you have the money to record in studios or get like fancy pancy recording stuff for home-use.
doesn't make any sense.
I agree that people who are really crap should stop getting their music out. Or just make stuff that's actually up to their skill level.

k, enough backing up to your rant?
thx
#20
Quote by Lumiere Rouge
Hahahahaha. I think I know why.

How old are you by the way? You sounded like an offended squirrel. I suggest you jump back into your basement and continue doing whatever you were doing before posting your idiotic comment.



You sound like as if you think you are greater than everyone else. You must realise that you are just a pathetic peace of ****, just like everyone else.
My gear:
  • Fender American Standard Telecaster
  • Ibanez RG450
  • Laney VC15
  • Electro Harmonix HOG
  • Vox Satchurator
  • Blackout Effectors Musket fuzz
  • Electro Harmonix Pulsar
  • Earthquaker Devices Disaster Transport
  • Malekko Chicklett

#22
Well a bad recording can almost kill you, but I wouldn't trust you with my brain.
#23
Lol I had a good chuckle. Why report? its harmless fun
The religious myth is the most powerful device ever created, and serves as the psychological soil upon which other myths can flourish.
#24
Quote by Lumiere Rouge
Ah yes, "troll". Stay long enough on any interwebz forum, engage in a few discussions, and sooner or later you will be called a nazi, troll or anti-semite. *YAWN*.

Apparently the true definition of "troll" is: anyone who says or does something you don't like or agree with.

Try something more original next time when you don't have something decent to say.

Your original post holds nothing of value worth discussing over, you didn't initiate a discussion, you're spamming nonsense, and you're advertising . The latter of which I believe to be against the rules. Decent enough? And a troll is a humanoid, usually between the levels 14 and 35.
I'm that dude with the fro.
Quote by angus fan16
Long story short, a whale flew out of the ocean, landed next to me and shot like a wall of water straight into my face.
#25
Quote by Devix_SG
Lol I had a good chuckle. Why report? its harmless fun


I reported it because it is spam. Good enough reason?
#26
Quote by Lumiere Rouge
Troll = anyone who says or does something you don't like or agree with. Right?

*DOUBLE YAWN*

If you think there is anything wrong with what I said, present proper counter-arguments instead of making juvenile insults.

Here's one. I think if people want to do a recording with whatever they got, they should. It doesn't hurt anybody and nobody has to listen to it.

/thread.
#27
Oh and by the way, your text was **** and was insanely idiotic. Youre opinion has been taken in, reflected upon and cast away.

now get the hell out before you make yourself seem dumber than you already appear.
My gear:
  • Fender American Standard Telecaster
  • Ibanez RG450
  • Laney VC15
  • Electro Harmonix HOG
  • Vox Satchurator
  • Blackout Effectors Musket fuzz
  • Electro Harmonix Pulsar
  • Earthquaker Devices Disaster Transport
  • Malekko Chicklett

#28
Quote by maggot9779
I reported it because it is spam. Good enough reason?


It made me laugh, and I'm not the only one, this is the pit after all, calm down and move on
The religious myth is the most powerful device ever created, and serves as the psychological soil upon which other myths can flourish.
#30
Quote by maggot9779


Right back at ya! lolz
The religious myth is the most powerful device ever created, and serves as the psychological soil upon which other myths can flourish.
#31
Am I the only one who read this and just thought it was a mildly amusing piece of whimsy about brain surgery? Calm down guys.
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#32
Quote by Glen'sHeroicAct
Yes, yes, we're all sick of teenagers with ten dollar microphones recording themselves and plastering their works on their myspaces. After several UG Albums, I've learned to tune these fuzzy creations out, allowing the ensuing white noise to lull me to sleep.


lol agreed, the TS has some truth tbh, sorry guys...get a job?
#33
op

theres only one way to say this:

you really are a dick
Quote by Deliriumbassist
Antisocial Behaviour Order. A chav's equivalent of GCSEs.
#34
This cracked me up ... (and I'm tired of seeing people get their rocks off on reporting everyone and everything ... I'd make a thread on it, but I figured it would probably get reported!)

Regardless it was a great analogy; I can see you put a lot of thought and effort into this and if all else, you made at least one person laugh today!
#36
Calm down, it's just his opinion...
Nonetheless no one has actually died of a crappy recording, while in a crappy brain surgery... well.
I actually found it very funny, it reminded me of my friends recording in a crowded room with $15 mics and a ****ty computer.
Member #? of theVIVA MEXICO CLUB

Beware of the Lawyer: the Dog is Harmless.
#37
what're you?
bloody freak?
You think Music needs to be made by professionaly trained people with ****loads money they don't deserve?
You're missing the entire point of music, which us universality and accessibility
Damn you, arse
#39
@ everyone getting pissed off at nothing.
Quote by duncang
maybe it's because i secrely agree that tracedin inymballsackistheb best album ever


he's got the fire and the fury,
at his command
well you don't have to worry,
if you hold onto jesus' hand