#1
so before going to bed i decided to have my happy time... i finish up and proceed to clean up, forgetting to close firefox, and my mom walks in.
worst part, im shirtless, so i cant flick my wang underneath.
so i quickly pull it off to the side so its out of visibility, and at the same time click the X on my browser..
guess what
multiple tabs!
so it asks my if i want to save etc and i hit quit
i think i got it in time but im not sure
my heart is still racing.
btw.. my parents are hardcore cjristian
#2
You gonna get excommunicated.
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#3
Hardcore Christian? As in "As I lay dying?"
Fender Jaguar -> Polytune -> Diamond Compressor -> Timmy -> OCD -> Big Muff -> Line 6 M9 -> Sonomatic Cheddar -> Spark boost -> Fender BDRI
#6
Tell them that, biologically, the only way that Mary could have become pregnant without busting her hymen would have been for god to fap on her, so it's ok for you to reenact that scene, but you didn't want to upset them by bringing a strange girl into the house.
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Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
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You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
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You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

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#7
If they are Catholic I doubt they care, hell they will probably just tie you up and fondle you
#9
awkward turtle
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Dude... I want to date a drum major. I bet they could fuck in time to Tool.
#10
Quote by neopowell
Tell them that, biologically, the only way that Mary could have become pregnant without busting her hymen would have been for god to fap on her, so it's ok for you to reenact that scene, but you didn't want to upset them by bringing a strange girl into the house.

Neopowell... you've made my night well done.