#1
A little while ago I heard about a jockey who was told that his father died, a few minutes before his race (not sure whether or not he went ahead with it but that's not the point). It made me wonder about the implications of giving or witholding sad information at particular times, for example before a big performance or while on a honeymoon. Would it be wrong to tell a person they've lost a loved one at a happy or pivotal moment, or when full concentration is needed? It's fair to say that the people you love are more important, but if the damage is done why make it impact upon your life further?

Sense tells me you'd have to tell the person as soon as you found out. Of course replies here aren't higly correlated with sense so I'd like to know what you thought.

TLDR: If you were about to play a very important gig that you'd prepared extensively for, would you want to know before or after that a loved one has died or something bad has happened?
#2
I'd want to perform well, but being told after would most def. take away the good feelings from the performance, but if I was told before I prolly wouldn't be able to perform, unless it was a really emotional piece, or whatever. Idk.

Catch 22?
#4
Do any of you remember Avril Lavigne being told that her grandfather died right before a song i think? If i remember right she heard it and ended up playing this one song in detication to him...
#5
I'd wanna know before the show and then say "MY *insert family or friend* JUST DIED! I DEDICATE THIS TO HIM/HER!!" then cry
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#6
Depends. If I was about to play some br00tal metalz I would want to know after. But if I was going to play an acoustic or a slower set I might want to know before so I can let the emotion hit while I played.
#8
Quote by Chaos Nil
Hah! I found it (The thing with Avril Lavigne)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONLr-zweXH0

(And some interview thing i found)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ht5KNY0g78A

Damn. Respect to her.

...modes and scales are still useless.


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#9
Quote by Xiaoxi
Damn. Respect to her.

*fap* *fap*

Uh....

Yeah but that must totally suck. When my grandfather died I couldn't get off the couch. Much less play a show
#10
In the case of a gig I'd probably want it before, for more emotion. Anything else though and I think after would be better.
#12
Quote by Le_Bunny
But would it be wrong to not tell the person immediately? Something tells me some people would be infuriated.

If they are, they're heartless.

...modes and scales are still useless.


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#14
hm....if I say before, it would affect my performance, but if I say after, it would ruin the great night.

I'll say afterwards so the people still get a good show at least.
#15
Quote by Xiaoxi
If they are, they're heartless.

My mom waited like an hour to tell me my grandfather died. It upset me beyond hell.
#16
If the person who needs to be told is sitting for a test or doing something important, than they shouldn't be told. Unless someone is ABOUT to die. Then they should be told so that they can go and be with them.

If the person is on their honeymoon, or something, I think they should be told.

This should probably be negotiated before they go on honeymoon, but it could be a little weird.

Daughter: Ok, dad, we're going on our honeymoon, now. Bye.
Dad: Have fun, child. Oh, and if I should happen to die, do you want to be told during or after?
XIAOXI
Last edited by Abunai X at Feb 28, 2009,
#17
Quote by The_Paranoia
Depends. If I was about to play some br00tal metalz I would want to know after. But if I was going to play an acoustic or a slower set I might want to know before so I can let the emotion hit while I played.

i play in a parkway drive meets august burns red meets misery signals type of band.
My mom told me before i played that one of my best friends was just in a car accident and is in the ER.
well that was probably the best i have played live before. ever in my life.
i had tears going down my face by the time we were done. But i got over to the hospital as fast as possible. I was playing guitar btw.
#18
Quote by convictionless
i play in a parkway drive meets august burns red meets misery signals type of band.
My mom told me before i played that one of my best friends was just in a car accident and is in the ER.
well that was probably the best i have played live before. ever in my life.
i had tears going down my face by the time we were done. But i got over to the hospital as fast as possible. I was playing guitar btw.

I swear when I heard my grandfather died I played guitar better than I ever have before. Keep in mind I know 4 chords and can't even play Some on The Water. And somehow, I actually played well.