#1
So I just wrote this last night. Crit for Crit i suppose.

The city sleeps outside my open window
And your memory drifts in upon the breeze
Evoking the sincerest love
I've always kept hidden

Moonlight washes my room in pale blue light
I could almost feel your breathe
And your hair resting upon my pillow
I would feel your shape

I would love you
If I only knew the words
to tell you
I just hope you can wait for me
Because these things take forever

And sleep crawls up through allys into my room
I'll be with you in my dreams
Wher we will live forever
If you'll stay with me

Street lamps show the path we have to walk
Across town to a room
Where I can look into your eyes
And touch your flawless skin

I would love you
If I only knew the words
to tell you
I just hope you can wait for me
Because these things take forever

If only time didn't pass so quickly
And decisions weren't so important
And parents didn't bind and break us
I would be good anyway

When I go to sleep and all is lost
In a jumble of moments
I will gather the memories we shared
That I wished I could live again
#2
I really like the opening lines.. to the song. the "moonlight" lines are good i could almost picture it.. the last line on the second verse seem a little short.. the chorus is pretty good i bet alot of people could relate with what you say there.. on the third verse i think you misspelled "where".. i like the line "ill be with you in my dreams" i like how you moved to the past on the four verse.. the last verse is a good ending it leaves a tragic feeling.. overall this is a nice love song.