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#1
So other then getting jacked as ****, what steps can I take? Of course, I don't actually have sex too often. I'm actually still a virgin, but only 17. I also seem to be only average downstairs. But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no? Or do these girls just not give a ****?

Any advice?
#3
Just get every STI on the planet.

If you have them, there's no risk of catching them again. They'll eat you up (pun intended).
Quote by Les_Frederiksen
PlayMadness, you give me hope for mankind.

Quote by Darksucker
PlayMadness - Jesus 2.0

Quote by genghisgandhi
Society's doing great. There's a rise of people like PlayMadness. I feel pretty good about the way things are going.
#6
Quote by Endless_Pain
So other then getting jacked as ****, what steps can I take? Of course, I don't actually have sex too often. I'm actually still a virgin, but only 17. I also seem to be only average downstairs. But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no? Or do these girls just not give a ****?

Any advice?

troll or not, i lol'd pretty good.
Quote by candysars
Thank you Jesusaurus.
#7
Just turn into a douchebag with no ambition
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#8
Quote by Endless_Pain
So other then getting jacked as ****, what steps can I take? Of course, I don't actually have sex too often. I'm actually still a virgin, but only 17. I also seem to be only average downstairs. But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no? Or do these girls just not give a ****?

Any advice?
You have already failed.
#9
Quote by Endless_Pain
But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no?

Any advice?


Oh dear god.
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#10
Quote by Endless_Pain
So other then getting jacked as ****, what steps can I take? Of course, I don't actually have sex too often. I'm actually still a virgin, but only 17. I also seem to be only average downstairs. But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no? Or do these girls just not give a ****?

Any advice?

Because getting jacked is easy.

Get back to me in five years or so.
Quote by shattamakar
The only advantage of home-schooling is that it gives you good reason to commit suicide.


Hit this once or twice, and you'll be twice as nice.
#11
1st of all, you have to have surgery to remove the muscle that holds 3 inches of ur pen0r inside the body, then , u gotta grow a really big mustache till its like a fuzzy caterpillar
Quote by soXlittleXtimeX
^
shanchett, you get an E for Effort

Quote by CodChick



ROFLLOBSTER
#13
home movies is the way to go. also,

Quote by Endless_Pain
but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no?


*Deported*
Quote by Joetime
Every time I masturbate it feels like I'm committing a small scale infanticide. Feels cool.
#14
TROLL!

Though there is a shortage of mexican's in porn...

Epiphone Les Paul Standard w/ SD Alnico Pro II's
Fender Aerodyne Telecaster & Stratocaster
Marshall JCM 800 4104 combo


E-Married to Funny_Page
#15
Start by making your own amateur porn. It will give you a platform to be seen by major pornography directors.

I suggest some kind of incest story with your mother. That'll get you noticed. Good luck, man.
#16
What you do is you try to get into a real acting career and then you fail at that. Do this and have successfully completed the first step to becoming a porn star. Also, having a vagina helps.
Founder of the EHX Users Guild
My Photography

Quote by Kyle-Rehm
Please don't tell me I'm the only one that clicked this thread thinking I would learn how to make my guitar sound like a grizzly bear.
#18
Quote by Endless_Pain
So other then getting jacked as ****, what steps can I take? Of course, I don't actually have sex too often. I'm actually still a virgin, but only 17. I also seem to be only average downstairs. But I think I could be a good porn star. Also not sure if this plays a factor, but I'm hispanic so will this help me or no? Or do these girls just not give a ****?

Any advice?


Oh you're Hispanic? Well that changes everything! Of course you can be a pornstar!
#19
Just for you to know, being a pornstar is an extremely hard job for a man. That's why usually you see the same men on porn movies. The job is so hard, that only some guys are able of being in that business for a long time.
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#20
I've always wondered how male porn stars get their jobs. I mean how the hell do you apply for that? Where do you go? I must know these things. Most of them do look like douches though.
Quote by NGD1313
Well I don't know about solos but how about that Smoke on the Water riff. It's like...impossible.


THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE

I'm Jake. I'm a musician, philosopher, and exhibitionist.
#21
bone a producer?
WONGA!
Quote by StringAssassin
I would be angry too if there were turds on my head.
#22
The Pit is always a good platform to found a solid ground on. From here your career have the potential to rocket to the Russia! Go for it!
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#23
Quote by RChandlerUG
nautralmaleenhancement.com

-Guitar Gear-
1995 American Fender Strat, EMG 85 pup
Randall RH200 Head
Marshall 1960a Cab
Woods Acoustic
-Bass Gear-
Spector Legend 4 bass
Washburn Bantam bass
Hartke HA2500
Fender Bassman 410H
Play what you love, love what you play
#25
shave your pubes, learn to ejaculate on command, be able to hold an erection for a long time while a lot of people are watching
theirs a good list of things on wikipedia
Warning: The above post may contain lethal levels of radiation, sharp objects and sexiness.
Proceed with extreme caution!
#26
Quote by imdeth
I suggest some kind of incest story with your mother. That'll get you noticed. Good luck, man.

Genius.
#27
Quote by Minkaro
I found this on TS's profile:


Oh dear...
My Last.FM



"The more you think, the better you're going to play. That should be a quote somewhere."
- Marty Friedman
#31
Quote by Minkaro
I found this on TS's profile:


He's got the incest requirement. A potential star is born. No pun intended.
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#32
I don't know, post some pictures of you working out [not naked/1!! >:-( ] and we can say.
#33
Quote by Minkaro
I found this on TS's profile:


Nice lmfao
#34
Quote by vintage x metal
Just turn into a douchebag with no ambition

this + a penis extension
Quote by severed-metal
Come to think of it, my penis should've listened to more death metal.


Quote by Morphogenesis26
So my question is. Can Pre-Cum fluid pass through my underwear, my jeans, onto and through her jeans, through her underwear, and impregnate her?
#35
Quote by soul_power
What you do is you try to get into a real acting career and then you fail at that. Do this and have successfully completed the first step to becoming a porn star. Also, having a vagina helps.


Well that's a load of crap. Everyone knows the reason pornstars don't get Oscars is because they are so good that the Academy is bitter about it all.
#36
Why would you want to be a porn star?
Her friends are gazing on her,
And on her gaudy bier,
And weep!-oh! to dishonor
Dead beauty with a tear!
They loved her for her wealth-
And they hated her for her pride-
But she grew in feeble health,
And they love her-that she died.
#37
Quote by psychogel
home movies is the way to go. also,


*Deported*


Daily golfclap goes to............*drumroll*....psychogel!

#39
Quote by urik
Just for you to know, being a pornstar is an extremely hard job for a man.


Well, obviously.
Quote by Ichikurosaki
sloth is hacking away feebly at the grass because he is a sloth but he was trying so hard ;_; hes all "penguin im HERE i am here to help you penguin"
#40
Quote by psychogel
home movies is the way to go. also,


*Deported*


LAMO Funniest **** ive read i a while
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