#1
This is a song I made a while ago. It's about a young king who f***ed up his kingdom because he thought he was the messenger of god and that he had to kill all the unbelievers. You know, the basic Babylon concept.

I have the lyrics too, if someone's interested. I quite liked the story.
Attachments:
mirages_of_sun_wall.zip
#2
I'd like to read the lyrics.

-Kind of a mournful feeling to it, at least at the start. The riff at 58 certainly puts an end to that and livens it up.
-Good solo, good sense of melody, very epic.
-Again, I like the infused lead work and overlapping guitar parts.
-The bridge at 109 is quite good, adds some speed and energy and leads nicely up to the ballad-like chorus.

Maybe the only thing I'm not hugely happy about is the verse, which gets a bit repetitive without the lyrics.

A lot of the song has sort of an epic, almost desert-like feel to it. Idk, maybe I just inferred that from the title and your mention of Babylon? Sounds cool.
None of it really sounded forced or unnatural, it just flowed on quite well.

9+ minutes of epic. You've got a style all your own, keep it up.
#3
Thanks man!

This is sort of an old song. I had this project a while back... I made a whole lot of Iron Maiden style songs and this was one of them... imo the best one. I was quite young when I started working with this one... but did the last solo just few years ago... and the lyrics, which are here:


MIRAGES OF SUN WALL

(measure 25)
When the time is for daybreak
And you discern the rising sun
Find a sacred moment
Whispering feel of bliss

(measure 89)
Danomyss in his travel
Discovered a land so shining in sun light
Raising towards the skies
A tower so high he could smile with the angels

So came the walls after words of his might
And light in the sky forever painted them gold

Innocent was his reflection
And eager his will to be the envoy of glory
Knowing deep in his heart
That one day the world would follow his orders

But until then...

I want to wander in the Garden of life
And feel the wind on the Sun wall in daylight
Though we are facing more sorrow in time
There must be one way through light

We must prepare for the night

Fortress - white as moonlight
Symbol of god serving truth in his name
Union within it gathered
And hailed out the name of their true king Danomyss

Darker grew nights as he bowed for a prayer
And blood of the sinners washed clean his white armor

Silence travelled through sands
Like praising the king of this old golden ocean
Pagans slain one by one
Fell to his feet and the light it grew brighter

(measure 189)
Knights seeked fire
As blood ran wild
Endless screams filled
The streets of Sun wall

Tears of dawn
Sealed the reign of love
And at the treshold of change
Stood One!

Nemesis of fallen faith
Rose up in that day from the sands of this kingdom
Spreading throughout the cities
A twilight so thick even the sunlight died out

Find me the hour when clouds broke like glass
And shattering splinters as rain they fell down

Danomyss cursed by his god
Covered his light and to a vision surrendered
Seeing in chain of time
That one day his light would follow the darkness

But until then...

I want to wander in the Garden of life
And feel the wind on the Sun wall in daylight
Though we are facing more sorrow in time
There must be one way to the light

I want to wander in the Garden of life
And feel the wind on the Sun wall in daylight
Though we are facing more sorrow in time
There must be one way to light

We must prepare for the night

---------

I'm not a native English speaker which you propably notice. That "But until then" is supposed to go to the end of the bridge but I'm not sure if I'm going to keep it... because it just sounds stupid if you sing it there.

I also designed two other parts for this song because it is quite epic, as you said. The other one is called "Stormbringer" and the third "Raising Lights". I thought I'd progress the story through some pretty dark concepts. This Danomyss goes to invade stuff Alexander the Great style and so on.

The lyrics have a huge impact to the song... and I agree that the verse and chorus are pretty boring without them. But like Iron Maiden, I just had strong chords there and let the vocals work the interesting part.

I actually have bit of a problem with implementing too much stuff to my songs. If there's too much going on during singing, well, that's not good.

That Stormbringer's got a good start, I'll propably post that here, too.
#5
Whoa! The song is pretty solid! I love the second half of the interlude, and the bridge. The solos are fantastic, and the acoustic section and middle section between the solos was solid as well. At bar 239, I love the drums. And the finish was epic.

Overall, great song
#6
Wow, the Intro is amazing. Sounds like somthing Hans Zimmer could have written, which is something good. The Drums on the Interlude are bit much, but it gets better in the second half. Which sounds actually pretty good. I like the guitar work you've done here. Same with the solo. Reminds me alot of some Medievalrock.
The Verse and the Chorus part are allright, nothing special to say about that. The second solo is as good as the first, maybe a bit long, but that's probably because I don't like long solos. Same with the Third Solo (or second, I'm confused now), sounds good but is too long for my taste. The Acousticpart inbetween sounds good and adds something different to the song. The Outro is a nice finish for the song.

You did a good job here.
Gear:
Ibanez SZ320 -> Höfner Analouge Delay -> MXR GT-OD -> Laney GH50L -> T.C.Electronics GMajor -> Line6 4x12 w/ Celestion G12T-75


My Lyrics and Poems


"with golden hair and perfect eyes,

with hollow words and empty lies."
#7
Very good, you know you have wrote a good song when it even sounds good in guitar pro. I liked the solos alot.
Gear List:
ESP LTD EC-1000, Amber Sunburst with Duncans
Ibanez AJ30ECE Acoustic-Electric
Line 6 Spider II 210 120 watt
Line 6 UX2