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#1
Okay so this is about my brother. Let me give a bit of background on him.
He's 28, jobless, lives at home with me, my mom and my dad (his girlfriend lives with us too), has 2 kids from different mothers (one being is current girlfriend) and has been addicted to drugs for the past 7 years or so. I don't know if he's still using but it seems like it. He has always been a screw up. In school he failed most of his classes and he barely passed high school. Once he turned 18 he started going out to street races and got involved with drugs. He had his first kid at about 22. Then he and the child's mother separated and the child lives with her. He's 28 now and is pretty much doing the same thing. He doesn't have anything to show for anything at all. He hasn't had a job in about 2 years and doesn't even go out to look for one anymore because he always tests positive for THC during drug tests.

Okay so onto the actual post. His gf got her tax return money about 2 or 3 days ago (it was about 4000 dollars) and the first thing they did was go out and buy a PS3. Then he goes out and buys a car that won't pass the smog test, doesn't have real seatbelts and roughly 90% of the parts on the car are stolen. My mother and father told him not to get it because it would just be another problem but he got it anyways. Today I was with him and we started talking about the car and I told him it was a bad decision and he got angry and said "You guys are all so negative. You all just want to see me fail". When he said this I first thought to myself "How could anybody want to see their brother/son fail at anything?" and secondly I thought "If we wanted him to fail, we would've kicked him out a long time ago". I told him that if he would've bought a regular car then nobody would've said anything but he thinks that everyone is against him. Anyway, this discussion went on for a while and it eventually turned into an argument.


Sorry for the wall of text...

My question to you UG is do you think that he made a good decision or do you think he's a dumbass?
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#2
tl;dr
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We're just trying to help man, cause it doesn't seem like you can get any pizza.
#3
tl;dr
but I say no, just for the sake of boosting your self esteem.
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#5
hes being a dumbass. How is that good idea?
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#7
In this situation, I think your parents are the numbskulls for not having kicked him out when he lost his job.
#8
I think honestly that you and your parents made the wrong decision by not getting him back on the right track 10 years ago. If me or my siblings had problems like this, my parents would stop at nothing to get me help, and would refuse to give me money or shelter unless I showed an effort to change myself.

Your parents should have kicked him out ages ago.
Last edited by CoreysMonster at Mar 10, 2009,
#9
tl:dr

but, since you're on the pit. you ARE labeled an asshole, as am i

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#10
real answer: just let him be, he should have gotten a normal car but hey, lifes cruel and then you die. so let him have a ****ty car and live in your basement.
Quote by ultimatedaver
We're just trying to help man, cause it doesn't seem like you can get any pizza.
#11
Dumbass.

There's no real upside to him, tell him to get a grip. He's 28 years old for fucks sake.
#12
We are assholes.

Try to convince the guy to go to some job interviews, get off his bum, quit drugs, and make a respectable living. Why spend that money on a car? Guitars are better.
#15
You should've said "I've been watching you fail every day for the last x number of years, it's getting boring dude, grow up"
#16
try having a family meeting of sorts to explain what everyone thinks of him. and warn him that he'll be out on the streets unless he grows up.
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#17
Do you think anyone's going to call this a good idea.

Possibly one of the least intelligent human being I've ever heard actually existing...
R.I.P. Charles Michael "Evil Chuck" Schuldiner
B. May 13 1967 - D. December 13 2001

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#21
yea, he's a **** up. him saying that everyone is against him is a true sign that he's a drug addict.

btw i lol'd when you said the first thing he bought with the tax return money was a ps3. sorry if i'm bashing him too hard.

now quick, show him this tread.
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#22
hes being a dumbass, kick him out before it gets worse
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#23
he is a **** up, my cusin whos like a brother (lives with us) is the exact same way only he has a job. but yeah he's a dumbass all around.

ps: sorry if that was mean..
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#25
the car thing seems like a bad idea he made but still, you should explain not everybodys against him. If he wants to spend some money on crap it's his choice. I mean you buy guitars right? a lot of people (not myself) would say 'why bother playing guitar when you could be at work in an office' or 'waste of time and money' etc...
#26
Quote by Highway60Bob
tl;dr

I scanned it but definitely didn't read it. I would say "RIP Dime" but I don't wanna get bannzorred. So I'll just say, whoop his ass, steal his PS3 and put sugar in his gas tank.
#27
We've tried getting him help, he's had a job working with my dad, he's had a job working with my aunt and my uncle and he ****ed everything up. I've told my mom to kick him out for so long and when she does it, he's back within 2 months. We can't make him go to rehab because he's over 18 and i know my mom and dad would've made him go but he started using drugs once he turned 18. I think my parents are complete idiots (my mom more than my dad) for keeping him and his girlfriend here. They only pay about 200 dollars of rent and they dont have to buy food, shampoo, toothpaste or anything at all.
Quote by csn00b
I hate seeing cute girls topless and what not, it just feels wrong.
#28
I don't think you're an asshole, and your brother sounds nearly exactly like my brother, and I had to beat the living **** out of him to get it through his head he can't continue on like he was, and that he had to change.
#29
Quote by archangels666
No, you're being too nice if you ask me.

It sounds like he's just trying to blame you guys now cuz he can't accept the fact that he's fucked up his life beyond repair.


Quote by metaldud536
I think you should kick him out. Send him to rehab.


Quote by PearlJames
hes being a dumbass. How is that good idea?


Quote by MetaMegaMagic
We are assholes.

Try to convince the guy to go to some job interviews, get off his bum, quit drugs, and make a respectable living. Why spend that money on a car? Guitars are better.


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If it was my parents, my parents would have LONNNNNNGGGGG kicked him out.


Quote by bendystraw
Kick his fat ass out the door.


Quote by Schism1985
yeah he's a ****in idiot man. and shouldn't he be saving up for like an apartment or something at least?



I would say that this is the general consensus that you will get here, with a big +1 from me.

Some people have issues getting off their feet, such as my friends brother who had a kid at 19 with no real education. He is 25 now, with another kid and wife, owns his own house, and has a good business degree and is making a decent wage. he has been clean for about 5 years.

Anyways, what I am getting at is that if he hasn't made a drastic life change by 28, I doubt its ever going to happen.
#31
Kick him out on the streets with nothing but a guitar. He will then learn the true meaning of the blues, and make money off play on street corners. You will then make it into a movie; the merchandising rights alone will buy him all the ****ty ass cars he wants.
#34
I think he made a poor descision, possibly a dumbass put i'm not gonna payout someone i have don't know. Sound like he need to join the army, that'll knock him into shape. Anyway good luck to him, it is his life.
#37
Sounds like a douche. He's too selfish to take what you have to say into real consideration. My guess is that deep down he knows you're all right but he's to immature to admit it. By the sounds of it, he and his girlfriend are far too immature to have a kid. I think you should:
a) either give the kids to adoption or your parents take care of them (either way, get them away from the immature druggie couple...
b) tell your brother to get off drugs and find a job within one month
c) after one month, he gets kicked out. Whether he has a job or not.

Hopefully reality will kick in and he'll wise up a bit. Right now he's coasting on your parents' cash and they're not taking action. I think you should talk it over with your parents. But don't go down the path your brother is doing. Trust me, I've had my experiences with drugs like that and in the end you just end up hurting everyone around you.
#38
Sounds like your brother is a bit of a loser. And by a bit I mean a lot. Your parents should turf him out on his ass so he can learn to take care of himself instead of spending his girlfriends tax refunds on PS3's and shitbox cars.
For a wounded man shall say to his assailant, "if I live I will kill you."
"If I die, you are forgiven."
Such is the rule of honour.
#39
I think you and your parents should kick him out and get him off drugs.
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