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#1
So I was sitting on the hardwood floor in front of my desktop computer reaching underneath the desk to reach the powerstrip to plug my amp in. I couldn't quite reach it, so I scooted forward a bit on my butt and got a bout ten-thousand splinters in my ass (they went right through my shorts). We have a rolling chair at the desktop computer and it tears up the wood a bit. So since I was sitting down, the splinters are right in that crevise between my ass cheeks and my leg.

What do I do?
Check out my band Disturbed
#5
1. Get a mirror
2. Get some tweezers.
3. Prepare for pain.
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.


-Jimi Hendrix-

Quote by CodySG
You know you're in the drug thread when you see pictures of squash and "tuna nigga!" when you click the page.
#6
icy hot
Quote by iantheman
I laughed at someone for breaking his g-string, and got sigged


Quote by Veil Of Osiris

You just made me spit out my Kool-Aid all over my keyboard.


sorry
#7
Do the same thing you did in the first place again, except backwards. That should clear it right up.
Goodness gracious me!
#9
Im not sure the Pit has finished med school and im no doctor but i suggest going to a street corner and letting a random cracked out homeless person take a look. That or a real doctor but the first one is sure to result in more lols.
Gear:
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#11
Push the splinters into your leg farther, its only the most logical thing to do.
Any spelling or grammatical errors written above are because of my inferior brain to yours. Good job, you won life.
#12
A hospital and a doctor COULD help you more than making a thread.
Infections aren't that fun, especially in your ass.

See a doctor
I hope it doesn't seem, like I'm young, foolish, and green.
Let me in for a minute, you're not my life but I want you in it


O Dayya, te echaré de menos, siempre

Y siempre
Y para siempre
#13
hit rewind
Soon you will sit on the bench
of those who deny I have my soul
You sell a dream you create
Condemned by what you condemned before
Smooth are the words you sing down and high
Underground is your joy your laws
#14
What a pain in the ass that must've been.


Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#15
try to burn the wood. go grab some kerosene and a lighter.......
If a mortal stands before us
Strike him down with sleight of hand.
And if heaven rides against us
Then God himself must be damned.


Computer Science major! Apple enthusiast!
I wear Vibrams and type with Dvorak!
#17
Sucks... I've got a splinter on my pointer that is impossible to get out... Can't practice till its gone.
Join cashcrate to make easy money. It may be tedious, but it does indeed work! Easily make $100 in about a week filling out random surveys.
#20
Quote by Bizarro
Do the same thing you did in the first place again, except backwards. That should clear it right up.

this is terrible advice that sounds exactly like good advice.

i approve, do this.
.
..
...
I have no opinion on this matter.
#21
1) Put a photo of aforementioned ass on the forums
2) Take splinters out
3) Put a photo of aforementioned ass on the forums.
#23
Get a hot bath going. Sit in the bath for a while. Than eventually get out. The hot water causes the splinters to pop out a bit and they become easier to remove. Works for me.
Feed your mind.
#24
pour hot wax over the area and have some one pull them all out. if that doesnt work burning is most likely the next logical answer, dont go to the doctor though, that doesnt make sense; you'll need a carpenter...
Yes, I have done that, and it indeed, was incredible.

Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not there...

"Pursue Happiness, With Diligence"
#25
I would ask your neighbor to pull them out.
What you cannot escape, you must fight; what you cannot fight, you must endure.
#26
Quote by thanksgiving
What a pain in the ass that must've been.


That's what she said.


On topic, uhhh I suggest seeing a doctor? Or get your sis to pinch out each one of them splinters?
D F O I N N T D
T W H O I R S D
Y O O R U
W S I U L C L K
A M S Y S

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Beautiful.
XxLloydxX for president!
Even though I'm english..

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#27
TS we need you to take picture with date and timestamp in order for us to answer you properly.
Quote by HelpTravesty
Hey everyone, SMOKE WEED!


It's raining blood from a lacerated sky.


#28
Quote by thanksgiving
What a pain in the ass that must've been.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
HA HA
Rip it out
it will hurt
alot
#29
Quote by Zugunruhe
this is terrible advice that sounds exactly like good advice.

i approve, do this.

#30
Quote by Firebread
Get a hot bath going. Sit in the bath for a while. Than eventually get out. The hot water causes the splinters to pop out a bit and they become easier to remove. Works for me.


How often does this happen to you?


My advice is Ctrl+Z
or does that only work in my world?
#32
Quote by thanksgiving
What a pain in the ass that must've been.

We sailed through endless skies...

Quote by King Twili

if someone sigs this i will be fairly displeased.


Lady Gaga has a penis! >>EVIDENCE<<

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#37
Lemons+Mercury= Win
Amp:
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Pedals
Barber DD
Wilson WH-10 Clone
Ibanez WH10 V2

Pitchblack Tuner
Boss DD-3
Guitars: 06' Custom Fender Strat Lindy Fralin Blues Specials, Callaham Tremolo
09' Olympic White Stratocaster
#39
Quote by vanhailin
get a girlfriend...



I will not ask my gf to take tweezers to my hairy ass
Check out my band Disturbed
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