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#1
for instance, you really have to fart but are surrounded by people you know, or you have to scratch your butt cheeks but have your mother sitting next to you, or your balls itch, but you're talking with your teacher.

this thread is for people posting their stories of how they got out of certain very uncomfortable situations.

I myself once had pretty extreme diarrhea, and had to talk to a teacher about a test. She had accused me of copying off of the guy that sat next to me, which I hadn't, but while I was talking with her, the diarrhea came, and I just said "jesus, gotta shoot some shit" and left her standing there.

naturally, after the whole incident the teacher had completely forgot about the accusation (or at least didn't want to mention the incident of me running to the bathroom while clutching my buttocks), and both of us got an A, and I got 15 bucks for letting him copy off of me.

your turn!
#2
I once got out of an embarrassing thread by leaving.
Quote by Chrisiphone
Oh wow this is a guitar forum!
Quote by JacobTheMe

Karvid is sexy

Quote by KAS1981
Why is it that some folks quote praise from other members in their sig lines?
Its lame.
#4
Quote by Karvid
I once got out of an embarrassing thread by leaving.


ba-zing!
Music, a steady riot in my soul
#5
Quote by CoreysMonster
oh come on, you used to be nice

I'm sorry. I do it for teh lulz


and fail


Quote by Chrisiphone
Oh wow this is a guitar forum!
Quote by JacobTheMe

Karvid is sexy

Quote by KAS1981
Why is it that some folks quote praise from other members in their sig lines?
Its lame.
#8
you can't scratch your balls in front of your own mother? Some teachers that are easy going wouldn't mind me scratching my balls, we're all males on eway or another

EDIT: yeah i hate those coughing fits in the middle of class where my face gets really red
Last edited by guiTardif123 at Mar 18, 2009,
#9
Quote by Pernell
No-hands ball scratch

sitting on chair:

cross legs woman style.
bounce leg up and down while clinching inner thigh muscles.


holy crap, that actually DOES work!

*writes down into diary*
#10
Quote by Karvid
I once got out of an embarrassing thread by leaving.

ZING

Also, I had a meeting with my headteacher today, and I had really itchy balls. Luckily his Secretary came in and he had to take a phone call. Could have been way worse.
hello
#11
If you have no decency, such as I, it won't really matter what you do around people. I once scratched my penis, and swore in front of a priest. I don't even go to church.
#12
It's 'embarrassing'.

I figure the key is self-confidence, or just some good acting for that matter. I always pretend to simply not give a sh*t, I'm just incredibly blunt like that. Oh, and I scratch my ass in front of my mother all the time.
#14
Sort of related: We were once playing truth or dare at a school trip in middle school and this one guy dared one of his classmates to lean on a teacher (who couldn't stand the kid) and sigh, "safeeeeety."

Lulz were had by all. Except, he bailed out and said that he won't do it.
Quote by Chrisiphone
Oh wow this is a guitar forum!
Quote by JacobTheMe

Karvid is sexy

Quote by KAS1981
Why is it that some folks quote praise from other members in their sig lines?
Its lame.
#16
****, I have a good self-esteem, I don't get embarrassed easily. I'll fart in front of anyone, who isn't someone important, and pretty much everything else. I don't need to worry about what they're gonna think about me if I itch my nuts, I know they do it too.
#18
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
****, I have a good self-esteem, I don't get embarrassed easily. I'll fart in front of anyone, who isn't someone important, and pretty much everything else. I don't need to worry about what they're gonna think about me if I itch my nuts, I know they do it too.

What if they're girls?
Quote by Chrisiphone
Oh wow this is a guitar forum!
Quote by JacobTheMe

Karvid is sexy

Quote by KAS1981
Why is it that some folks quote praise from other members in their sig lines?
Its lame.
#19
I'd be more embarassed farting in front of strangers than farting in front of people I know.
As for the scratching, distract their attention so that they look away from you for a few seconds, and scratch away.
#21
During school one day, we have aisles between our desk so we were all working on the homework and everyone was talking. So I was talking with my friend on one side of me when i said soemthiong and being really eccentric trying to prove some poitn i shot my hand out into the aisle on the other side of me. Well, i didn't look first and as probably the hottest girl i know walked by i slapped her on the ass by accident. I immediately yelled "OH CRAP!!" and the whole class looked and she was too embarassed to say anything so she jsut walked away.

Wouldn't have been such a bad thing but her boyfriends huge and would've killed me.
#22
Quote by TheQuailman
It's 'embarrassing'.

I figure the key is self-confidence, or just some good acting for that matter. I always pretend to simply not give a sh*t, I'm just incredibly blunt like that. Oh, and I scratch my ass in front of my mother all the time.


dammit, when did you get better at english than me?

I KNEW there was something wrong with the spelling!
#23
if you have to scratch your balls in public just put your hands in your pockets and scratch away from there...and who doesn't scratch their ass infront of their family?

I like to find sneeky ways of farting.
[img]http://img300.imageshack.us/img300/3760/356h356h365pc1.png[/img]
Die Ruhe vor dem Sturm.
#24
I once stubbed my toe in a room full of children...

MOTHERFFFFFF!!!!!!!

...

*picks up guitar*

Do you think they'll drop the bomb...
#27
Quote by Eminored
If I'm talking one-on-one with someone, I treat it like a staring contest.

+1 you can get away with doing pretty much anything if you keep eye contact and don't look down at what you're doing haha.
#29
Quote by TheQuailman
Once again, the dictionary saved my ass!
http://www.pons.de/

I used to be a total freak when it came to spelling back in school. My English essays were crap, but I always got good grades for the grammar and spelling.



I'm actually an English native speaker, which is where it gets a little "peinlich" (not even gonna try and spell the english word for that) when native German speakers are better at spelling than you
#30
Just say **** it and scratch your nuts or do whatever you have to do.
My Gear Brah:
  • Ibanez K7 (silver)
  • Gibson Les Paul Custom (ebony w/ gold hardware)
  • Mesa Triple Rectifier Head
  • Mesa Rectifier 4x12 Traditional Cab
  • Too many pedals to list...

#31
If I need to fart I make sure I keep moving and drop it while walking past a large group of people and then walk on.

It's fullproof and it's funny to see them try to figure out who it was.
Quote by the_white_bunny
your just a simpleton that cant understand strategy apparently.

Quote by the_white_bunny
all hail king of the penis sucking(i said balls. you said dick for some reason?) Isabiggles
#32
Quote by Karvid
What if they're girls?

I figure if a girl is gonna get mad at me for scratchin my balls in front of her, she isn't gonna like what I do when we're alone if we're going out.
#33
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
I figure if a girl is gonna get mad at me for scratchin my balls in front of her, she isn't gonna like what I do when we're alone if we're going out.


"Oh sorry, did you want a turn Miss?"
#34
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
I figure if a girl is gonna get mad at me for scratchin my balls in front of her, she isn't gonna like what I do when we're alone if we're going out.

Well honestly that shouldn't matter anyways. Doing whatever you want as long as it's not like hella disgusting would just make the girl think you're not trying too hard to impress her or care about her that much and BAM she likes you even more.
My Gear Brah:
  • Ibanez K7 (silver)
  • Gibson Les Paul Custom (ebony w/ gold hardware)
  • Mesa Triple Rectifier Head
  • Mesa Rectifier 4x12 Traditional Cab
  • Too many pedals to list...

#35
Quote by CoreysMonster
I'm actually an English native speaker, which is where it gets a little "peinlich" (not even gonna try and spell the english word for that) when native German speakers are better at spelling than you

I thought you were a 100% original Kraut?
Oh well, neither am I, so what am I complaining about?
#36
Quote by TheQuailman
I thought you were a 100% original Kraut?
Oh well, neither am I, so what am I complaining about?


nope, I'm actually mexican-american, I moved to germany when I was 9.

and what the hell, you're a fraud, too?

where the hell are you from?
#37
If I fart in public and people look at me, I keep reading or whatever I'm doing like nothing happened, and if someone continues to stare, I look up at them and smile and keep doing whatever.
#39
Quote by TheQuailman
Where half the fake Germans are from: Poland.
And just like you, I fail at my native language.


I do not fail at english! (only sometimes) I even taught it for several years!


but yeah, I always thought you weren't 100% german, because, forgive me, 100% germans are kinda lame, dont you think?
#40
Quote by CoreysMonster
I do not fail at english! (only sometimes) I even taught it for several years!


but yeah, I always thought you weren't 100% german, because, forgive me, 100% germans are kinda lame, dont you think?

Tell that to hitler!...


oh wait...
"You're a twat!"- That dude in morrisons

"You Ugly git!" - That girl in the restaurant

"You Were a Mistake!" - Mum

just a few of my fans..



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