Bands latest song. Started out kinda like an Alexisonfire type song and then just went from there I guess. The massive Outro, or Part Two, came out of nowhere when we just kept playing after the song one time. We tried to make the outro epic. Did it work?


Wow, great song. I'm guessing/hoping there are going be some lyrics added soon.
The song got a bit repetitive after the verse but im expecting this to change after the lyrics are added.
Bars 34 and 63 where there is only a drum part just sounds weird to my ears. This could be exactly what your going for but it sounds as if everything just stops and then it returns out of nowhere.
Also the "outro". The "epic" part sounds amazing and ends the song perfectly, but the "outro" seems to kill the hyped up mood of the song completely.
If you were to keep both parts i would definitely separate them (Make part one the intro to an album and part 2 the end of the album)

Overall great song, id love to hear it being played by a full band
I really dig the intro. Does a really good job at "building up" if you know what I mean, just like an intro should do.
I really dig the verse too, and the dissonant chord worked surprisingly well. I guess because they stayed in key. I try to do that with my dissonance too. I think it should get some kinda alteration though, instead of the same thing four times.
My favorite part of the prechorus is actually the very last measure. I know the person before me said they didn't like that.
Nothing in particular to say about the chorus/post-chorus. It all works very well together though.
This verse I also think needs some sort of alteration.
During the bridge, I think there's a tad too much time of just one pitched instrument, but it's no big deal. I noticed that the bass is a lot more experimental than people have been doing. I like that.
Nothing special to say about the new pre chorus either.
I really like the altered beginning of the chorus.
I reeaally like the heavy sections after that, and again the dissonance fit really well.
Are you using a drum machine in the "outro"? Everything fits well here to, and I like the delay. I was so waiting for the synth strings. Haha. I was just thinking "there needs to be strings here..." Haha.
The epic certainly worked. I would suggest making the tremeloing guitar change notes more often. And gradually bend up for the last beat or two
of 163. I don't know how I feel about it ending with drums, but there's nothing wrong with it.
Over all this is pretty great, and everything fits together extremely well, which is something I think is really important.

EDIT: I think you're song was longer than mine.
I'll try my best with this since you were so kind to give mine a good run-down. I'm not big on this dramatic/melodic stuff, either.

Anyway, the structure of the song is great. My favorite part of the whole song is just those little atonal high notes in the first verse (similar to what you used in the postchorus outro thing). And for a melodic song, you kept it really nice and clean, no rough edges or akward transitions.

After the soft outro (great job, by the way) was on for a while, I forgot I was listening until the epic part hit. Beautiful. I don't have much personal input to give, sorry.
Nice banana, Andy Warhol.
Thanks for the crit. You didn't make this easy though This song is pretty much awesome all the way through and I can't really find anything to say that hasn't already been said, so I will just re-enforce somethings other people said.

The only two problems I see are the pre-chorus and the outro. During the pre-chorus you completely stop the guitar before the chorus starts, I think this really takes a lot away from that whole section. Unless your vocalist yells out a lyric or two during this time, I would suggest putting something in there, as the chorus seems to start out of nowhere, and the silence takes away from the epic-ness.

Hell, you could take bar 46 and put it at 34 and it sounds ok, with a bit of modification it would be much better than what you've got.

Also another point, since you have chugging chords in the pre-chorus try having that guitar just play a few chords(like whole note chords) in the chorus, as this will open up the chorus, allow better room for vocals, and make it far more epic.

And in the outro switch up the tremolo notes a bit, because they become slightly tedious.

Overall, it was ****ing awesome.
As for the intro, nice!

Into the pre-verse 1 area, it became a favorite song, but oh wait, it couldn't because it isn't recorded... .

By the pre-chorus I was definitely hooked on it, the chorus pretty much sealed the deal. The post chorus, it seemed a bit plain, sorry, but your song is still going strong!

Verse 2 through the end of the chorus into the bridge, transition was really good, and I thought it fit the song.

The "Diff Pre-Chorus" was definitely a good cookie to eat!

At outro/part 2 the entire song changed its feel, it felt like a Silent Hill song (for when someone dies) at this point. The piano part made me feel chills lol. I got a laugh out of the section titles around this part lol..

Trying to be epic, you freaking made it epic. It was really amazing, I loved it, it doesn't get much better than that.

10/10!!!! FREAKING RECORD IT OR LET MY BAND DO IT lol.. any lyrics?
PSN: RokkstarX
Live: RokkyX

All my original (C4C) material is located here.
should have lyrics in a couple of days, next band prac anyway. the singer is writing them. might be a while untill we record it though haha. might have a video by next month or something at our gig, i dunnnooooo. thanks for all the positive reviews though guyss.
You, my fine sir, are possibly an embodiment of god. This is an amazing piece of work, the whole way through.

After feeling kind of down the past week or so, listening to this song really helped me for some reason, and you have now gotten me into post hardcore. Bravo .

Crit if you want, (not that this was much of a crit, more of a praise) https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=19107407#post19107407
We can only guffaw at all the humbug we are told about martyrs.
ok, im going to try to crit this way

intro - good stuff. i like what the lead guitar does

verse - im not so sure about the 10-13 dissonance, but im sure it sounds better with a real guitar

prechorus - i like the drums here. it makes a really good prechorus

chorus - this sounds amazing.... great job here

post chorus - its kinda bland... but i guess it transitions back to the intro riff good.

verse - same as intro

pre chorus, chorus - same

bridge - this sounds pretty amazing as well.

different prechorus - YES. this is good

chorus - i like how the lead is by itself before the whole band comes in

pre outro - im digging this. its a nice strong way to end the song.

PART 2 - i love the electric drums and delay guitar and all that. it is soothing, especially when the piano and strings come in

trying to be epic - i think on the lead guitar, instead of using just one string, make it an octave. just my opinion though. this part is definately epic though.

idk about the drums. maybe if you fade out the real drumset, and at the same time, fade in the electronic one to end on? i think it would sound pretty good.

sorry i took so long to get back to you :P
Alright, we start with a nice intro. Good build up, nice way to start a song, and then we kick in and start rockin' out Alexisonfire style. Then, the verse comes in and we get a nice dosage of "**** yeah!"

Then, the prechorus catches me by suprise when we see the percussion break. Then, we get some more Alexisonfire rock out on the chorus and postchorus, and then we go back to our intro riff for another badass verse. Prechorus is even cooler the second time, and then we can start the pwnage in the chorus again soon enough. After that, we get a nice semi-full stop, a build up, and then we start the moshing.

The altered prechorus brings us back down for the chorus after a major turning point in the song, and then we turn around again for the chorus. Then, we get some dissonant chords. Some moshing, and then we stop and break for an RnB style part 2, but recatching the Alexisonfire feel again. This clean break lasts amazingly long, still while sounding perfect.

The release of all the pent up energy from the clean break bounces back like mad and puts us in a "last mosh for the night" mode. And the fade concludes with only drums remaining.

10/10, I don't hand this rating out a lot but you sure as hell deserved it.
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nice discovery, sir.

Last edited by coryklok : Today at 01:10 PM.
O_o my god, that was amazing epicness uber greatness. and that almost wasn't enough to describe it. 10/10, get some good lyrics and i'll give it a 10.1/10