#1
So this is my latest song I've written.
Chrous is sung and verses are screamed.
Sentences in brackets means it's being sung as well.

Let me know what you think, c4c, leave a link!

Love with Restraints

A chained beast blinded from the sights of,
everything that mattered to him the most.
[Wrapped tightly in sheets of guilt and sorrow]
He won't live tomorrow.

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.

Only she can unleash the shackles,
that bind him to the burning hell he lives.
[He hangs on to his last hope of life}
Hangs on to his last hope!

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.
Don't you know that,
you can save me from it all.
Just scream my name,
give me a reason to break from this hell.

I'll break these chains,
keeping me from you!
I'll break these chains,
keeping me from you!
I'll break these chains,
[Keeping me from you...]

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.
Don't you know that,
you can save me from it all.
Just scream my name,
give me a reason to break from this hell.
#2
[quote="'Vicious [S7VN"]']So this is my latest song I've written.
Chrous is sung and verses are screamed.
Sentences in brackets means it's being sung as well.

Let me know what you think, c4c, leave a link!

Love with Restraints

A chained beast blinded from the sights of,
everything that mattered to him the most.
[Wrapped tightly in sheets of guilt and sorrow]
He won't live tomorrow.

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.
It seems odd that you're lying near your death bed and not in it

Only she can unleash the shackles,
that bind him to the burning hell he lives.
[He hangs on to his last hope of life}
Hangs on to his last hope!
delightfully emo

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.
Don't you know that,
you can save me from it all.
Just scream my name,
give me a reason to break from this hell.

I'll break these chains,
keeping me from you!
I'll break these chains,
keeping me from you!
I'll break these chains,
[Keeping me from you...]

I lie closer to,
my silver-lined death bed,
but all I see is,
visions of you within my head.
Don't you know that,
you can save me from it all.
Just scream my name,
give me a reason to break from this hell.

i like that you brought it back to this death bed thing again



This is a pretty solid song. I think some of the themes are a little repetitive making it come off a bit redundant. But that's just a matter of personal preference.
Keep up the good work.
Crit mine?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=19138380#post19138380
I want Super Saiyan abilities
#6
Sounds good man. I think it would make a really good metal song personally. The verses were my favorite... I don't know, they just seemed a little more "hard core" than the chorus, haha!
Great work, keep it up!... and thanks for the crit on mine
#8
Now this one REALLY reminds me of Bullet For My Valentine

Good stuff man
Guitars:
-Gibson Les Paul Custom Shop Silverburst (Invader/'59)
-Fender Standard Telecaster HH Black (SH-5/'59)
-Fender Standard Stratocaster HH White (Nazgul/'59)
-Austin Guitars Les Paul Goldtop Copy (Distortion/'59)
-Ovation ApplauseAE44II Elite Black Acoustic


Amps/Cabs
-Peavey 6505+
-Peavey Stereo Chorus 2x12 Combo
-Behringer Ultracoustic ACX450 1x8 Acoustic Combo
-Marshall MX2x12 Cabinet


Wayyyyy too many effects pedals...