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#1
Okay, so there's this drug dealer/kid I go to school with and he always gives me **** (hes a wigger and he thinks everything i do is "gay"). So finally I stopped taking it and said things like "shut up" and "alright, whatever you need to tell yourself". You must understand, though, that no one ever talks back to him as he is border line crazy and very large (not to mention training in Kickboxing). A while ago he tried to fight me in the school parking lot (pushing me and telling me to "back my **** up") and I refused to fight back, making him look like a complete dousche bag infront of just about everyone.
Today, I went to a mall with a few friends (Kids 1 and 2). Kid 2 finds out that Dr. Dousche is in the mall and goes to hangout with him, where as Kid 1 and I find my good friend (and bassist) and his GF (Dr. Dousche drove them). So we went on rides (our mall has a theme park in it..) until my bassist gets a text form Dr. Dousche saying that he is parked next to my car and if I do not come face him he will key it. So naturally I walk out of the mall, light a cigarette, and start walking towards Dr. Dousche.
Dr. Dousche greets me with a nice healthy shove and exclaims "WHAT!? are you just going to smoke your ****ing cigarette?" and pushes me once again. Once I walked back up to him I blew my smoke in his face and said "yes, you do what you have to do". He proceeded to shove me around the parking lot, pushing me to the ground occasionally, screaming "What are you gonna back your **** up?" "You think your tough!?" and "you such a bitch". Every time I would say "yep", "sure", "nope, im not gonna fight you." His efforts were so pathetic that i finished my cigarette and put it out all while he was shoving me.
Some of the highpoints of the "fight" were when cars would drive by asking if everything was alright and I would smile and say "yeah, he needs this". Once he shoved me to the ground and I smiled and said "Does that make your penis feel bigger?"
So he walks back to his car and I was waiting for my bassist to tell Dr. Dousche that he was riding him with me. They stayed in the car for a long time until Dr. Dousche comes out once again shoving me screaming "were ending this now, you are going to fight me" So naturally I take it for a minute, telling him, no I am not going to fight. Finally, I told him to take his hands off of me and we will solve this like adults. He then proceeds to punch me in the eye sharply and walk away before I could even look up. A few people asked me if I was OK, and later that day I began receiving texts about it. Naturally he was bragging about it.


tl;dr Today I was attacked by a crazy drug dealer, I informed him i was not going to fight him and he shoved me for around 20 minutes before punching me in the face and walking off.
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Last edited by Stoner stone at Mar 26, 2009,
#3
You profess to be a pacifist yet continually antagonize him and provoke him into hitting you? Might want to check up what it is to be a pacifist there bud, though I bet you felt like a real badass blowing smoke in his face. Seriously dude, grow up.
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#4
cool story bro.

All kidding aside, it sounds like he pretty much just got pwned.
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#5
Quote by Stoner stone
Okay, so there's this drug dealer/kid I go to school with and he always gives me **** (hes a wigger and he thinks everything i do is "gay"). So finally I stopped taking it and said things like "shut up" and "alright, whatever you need to tell yourself". You must understand, though, that no one ever talks back to him as he is border line crazy and very large (not to mention training in Kickboxing). A while ago he tried to fight me in the school parking lot (pushing me and telling me to "back my **** up") and I refused to fight back, making him look like a complete dousche bag infront of just about everyone.
Today, I went to a mall with a few friends (Kids 1 and 2). Kid 2 finds out that Dr. Dousche is in the mall and goes to hangout with him, where as Kid 1 and I find my good friend (and bassist) and his GF (Dr. Dousche drove them). So we went on rides (our mall has a theme park in it..) until my bassist gets a text form Dr. Dousche saying that he is parked next to my car and if I do not come face him he will key it. So naturally I walk out of the mall, light a cigarette, and start walking towards Dr. Dousche.
Dr. Dousche greets me with a nice healthy shove and exclaims "WHAT!? are you just going to smoke your ****ing cigarette?" and pushes me once again. Once I walked back up to him I blew my smoke in his face and said "yes, you do what you have to do". He proceeded to shove me around the parking lot, pushing me to the ground occasionally, screaming "What are you gonna back your **** up?" "You think your tough!?" and "you such a bitch". Every time I would say "yep", "sure", "nope, im not gonna fight you." His efforts were so pathetic that i finished my cigarette and put it out all while he was shoving me.
Some of the highpoints of the "fight" were when cars would drive by asking if everything was alright and I would smile and say "yeah, he needs this". Once he shoved me to the ground and I smiled and said "Does that make your penis feel bigger?"
So he walks back to his car and I was waiting for my bassist to tell Dr. Dousche that he was riding him with me. They stayed in the car for a long time until Dr. Dousche comes out once again shoving me screaming "were ending this now, you are going to fight me" So naturally I take it for a minute, telling him, no I am not going to fight. Finally, I told him to take his hands off of me and we will solve this like adults. He then proceeds to punch me in the eye sharply and walk away before I could even look up. A few people asked me if I was OK, and later that day I began receiving texts about it. Naturally he was bragging about it.


tl;dr Today I was attacked by a crazy drug dealer, I informed him i was a pacifist and he shoved me for around 20 minutes before punching me in the face and walking off.




I found your problem.
#7
Quote by Wheelchair Stan
You profess to be a pacifist yet continually antagonize him and provoke him into hitting you? Might want to check up what it is to be a pacifist there bud, though I bet you felt like a real badass blowing smoke in his face. Seriously dude, grow up.

sorry, i did use that word alittle loosely. i didnt really say that, haha, i just told him i wasn't going to fight because it wouldn't solve anything. everytime i said that, he looked at me really confused and shoved me again.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#8
Quote by Wheelchair Stan
You profess to be a pacifist yet continually antagonize him and provoke him into hitting you? Might want to check up what it is to be a pacifist there bud, though I bet you felt like a real badass blowing smoke in his face. Seriously dude, grow up.


owned. kinda funny, but probably not much different than what i would do, minus the arrogance (cigarette)


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#9
Take a gun to school and shoot everything.
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Stop failing, and things will work out.
#10
2 idiots don't make a genius. seriously.. you mocked him as he was hitting you, i bet that made your pen0r feel bigger. you deserved to get punched... you should have just told one of the cars to call the cops or just let him key your car, and then call the cops and show them the text... that's evidence
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#11
Quote by JacobTheMe


I found your problem.

you're joking right? god i hope so, otherwise you are and total dipsh!t
If you say Randy Rhoads isn't amazing, I will hunt you down (Same for Marty Friedman)Founder of Rhoads/Friedman pm if you want in..
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#12
Quote by operation ktulu
you're joking right? god i hope so, otherwise you are and total dipsh!t


Smoking is bad for your health. I just wanted to let him know that he might have won today, but in 40 years he will die of lung cancer. Who will be the winner then?
Last edited by JacobTheMe at Mar 26, 2009,
#13
Quote by FightinIrishPJ
2 idiots don't make a genius. seriously.. you mocked him as he was hitting you, i bet that made your pen0r feel bigger. you deserved to get punched... you should have just told one of the cars to call the cops or just let him key your car, and then call the cops and show them the text... that's evidence

I dont need to get the police involved, especially because hes friends with my friends and everyone would have been super pissed at me. . Also, I told him to just leave more than anything, but I couldn't help but let that wee bit of wit slip.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#14
When he said "What are you gonna back your **** up?" you should have said "Yes. Through interpretative dance." Then showed him your feelings via dancing
#16


i dunno man, you shoulda fought him. Especially in school. It didnt make him look like a douche, it made you look like a pussy. Sure, i guess you can take the pacifist high horse, but really, most people'll think ur a puss.
#17
Quote by Pernell


i dunno man, you shoulda fought him. Especially in school. It didnt make him look like a douche, it made you look like a pussy. Sure, i guess you can take the pacifist high horse, but really, most people'll think ur a puss.

bwahaha, i doubt not wanting to fight a kid literally twice my height makes me a pussy. I think him wanting to fight me makes him look like a dousche as there is no way i could win such a fight.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#18
I bet you think you're badass. Seriously, you could of handled **** a lot better.
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#19
dude if hes sellin just have someone use thier phone get a vid take it to the police and give him a brut soap on a rope for his new shower in jail
#20
Quote by Stoner stone
(our mall has a theme park in it..)



that seems to be the most interesting part of your post.


awesome. i wish my mall was cool.
#21
Quote by CustomCustom
dude if hes sellin just have someone use thier phone get a vid take it to the police and give him a brut soap on a rope for his new shower in jail

can they really do that off a video? I mean, how can they tell its real weed?
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#22
Quote by Stoner stone
Naturally he was bragging about it.


naturally, your bragging about it
I'm FAT!
#23
Quote by tatatotfolife
naturally, your bragging about it

oh yes. I am very proud of myself.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#24
Quote by Stoner stone
oh yes. I am very proud of myself.

I'm sure he is too
sim simma

who got the keys to my beema
#26
Quote by Oroborous
You should have socked it to him.

POW! right in the kisser!

nah man, fightin never solves nothin.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#28
Quote by Xenogis
When he said "What are you gonna back your **** up?" you should have said "Yes. Through interpretative dance." Then showed him your feelings via dancing


Why did I lol so hard at this?
~don't finkdinkle when ur supposed to be dimpdickin~
#30
Quote by drunkinkoala
You're more bad-ass than fuck.

i know your being sarcastic, but thats all i really wanted.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#31
Jesus christ, give TS a break. It's a funny story, and he didn't retaliate violently - that's fairly rare. Who cares if he had some fun while he was at it?

Sounds like Dr. Douche's IQ+body temperature = 42
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#32
Quote by hans testiclees
Jesus christ, give TS a break. It's a funny story, and he didn't retaliate violently - that's fairly rare. Who cares if he had some fun while he was at it?

Sounds like Dr. Douche's IQ+body temperature = 42

thanks man.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#34
Quote by snipelfritz
**** Yeah MOA!

YES!! and i love your location! haha im SO glad i know that song came out of MN.
Quote by seokorn
your awesome stoner

Quote by Frobot!
Tapeman is my hero.
#35
okay as ''kid number 1'' i think in this story i think i should say a few things on behalf of my friend ''dr. dousche''

stoner you talk **** to him all the time and you never back it up. he never said he was going to key your car. you ****ing got your ass shoved around for about 3 minutes and you continued to call zach names during it. if you can ****ing talk **** you should be able to back it up if you cant your all talk and just a ****ing piece of **** pussy who is afraid of the people hes talking **** about

why even talk **** to someone who hates you, esspecially if they are bigger than you AND ''crazy''

you make this story sound like it was all him and you're so innocent when really he had every right to hit you.


maybe you should grow a pair of balls and or grow a brain and stop talking **** you cant back up.
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#36
my bad im number 2 and hes not a drug dealers....?
Quote by bassmaniac101

You are amazing.

Quote by Arch1119
^^yay photoshop...you made me lol all over myself
#37
The message I got from that is that smoking gives you black lungs filled with tar.

I bet I could cut you open and fix up the pothole outside my house.
PPPPPPPOSTFINDER
#39
Quote by fezrockz
okay as ''kid number 1'' i think in this story i think i should say a few things on behalf of my friend ''dr. dousche''

stoner you talk **** to him all the time and you never back it up. he never said he was going to key your car. you ****ing got your ass shoved around for about 3 minutes and you continued to call zach names during it. if you can ****ing talk **** you should be able to back it up if you cant your all talk and just a ****ing piece of **** pussy who is afraid of the people hes talking **** about

why even talk **** to someone who hates you, esspecially if they are bigger than you AND ''crazy''

you make this story sound like it was all him and you're so innocent when really he had every right to hit you.


maybe you should grow a pair of balls and or grow a brain and stop talking **** you cant back up.



OH SHI---

#40
Quote by fezrockz
okay as ''kid number 1'' i think in this story i think i should say a few things on behalf of my friend ''dr. dousche''

stoner you talk **** to him all the time and you never back it up. he never said he was going to key your car. you ****ing got your ass shoved around for about 3 minutes and you continued to call zach names during it. if you can ****ing talk **** you should be able to back it up if you cant your all talk and just a ****ing piece of **** pussy who is afraid of the people hes talking **** about

why even talk **** to someone who hates you, esspecially if they are bigger than you AND ''crazy''

you make this story sound like it was all him and you're so innocent when really he had every right to hit you.


maybe you should grow a pair of balls and or grow a brain and stop talking **** you cant back up.



.....and now we wait for TS
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