This was originally a piano song, but I decided to make it into a rock song (the original demo is the Clavinet; just switch it to solo if you want to hear how it originally sounded)

It is 100 times mellower/melodic compared to my last few things I've posted.
Lord Gold feeds from your orifices and he wants to see you sweat.
Lord Gold probes you publicly and makes your pussy wet.
Now say his name.....
The intro is definately mellow. bar 13 starts nicely, but I'd propably turned it into an ascension to a heavy riff. 14-21 is maybe a bit too loose for me. It just floats by without doing anything. The following acoustic parts are nice, but they lack some sort of melody.

What the hell happens in bar 35? Sorry if I'm discouraging, but that sounded horrible to my ear. Tremolo? Why? That melody at 37 is something more definate, which is nice. I'm a big fan of melodies. After 44 it starts to get pretty messy. So full of noise. That needs some clarification.

The stuff after bar 68 sounds pretty proggy. It sounds pretty forced, but that jazzguitar stuff at bar 76 saves the whole thing. It's nice and airy.

85-90... I just don't know. Maybe someone likes this but not me. The sologuitar is just out of place there.

Outro is nice and calm. Like most of the song. Overall... pretty messy song. I didn't like it a whole lot. There's some nice rhythm sections with acoustic guitars and in some parts the build ups are fine, but the climax never comes. This song just comes and goes and all I remember are those horrible tremolos and out of tune bends.

I would clarify this one a LOT. Make the sections more definate and give them a reason to exist. I'm not saying that there isn't one... I just didn't catch it. Some melody would be nice. Something to remember. This isn't too interesting song in my opinion and it's messy. There's a lot going on overlapping eachother so nothing really gets the attention they deserve.

Well, I would take the good parts and try building the song around them. Making it about them and not like... well they're there and just add stuff to make it more stuffed up... ehh. Sometimes less is more. Just one guitar can do wonders when the riff is good. Then add maybe another to just spice things up. You know?

C4C, see my sig.