#1
In my profile <------ called Give/Mend

Here is a song I have written hopefully the recording is a lot better than my last attempt (everything is not paned left this time :P)

unfortunately my bass pedal broke so I just put the drums in with garage band so the only things I am actually playing are the 2 guitars and vocals. everything else is software.

Lyrics:

[CHORUS]
The only time people give is when they know
that they can take it back and say "why'd I give this to you anyway?"

[VERSE1]
On the corner of the broken glass I saw the world as it was
then i'd wonder who'd want to live in it all because

[VERSE2]
Everyone is living in either drama or shame
While people live in fame others live like slaves

BTW these lyrics are really short I know but I took them from 2 pages of lyrics I wrote. I just thought they didn't fit these were all just the pre-chorus and I'm like this is to long and these would be fine as there own song so I was like what the heck and made this in one night and I'm proud even though its not that good.

Edit: I am gonna re-record most of the vocals in a minute.
Last edited by rockfan7 at Jun 27, 2009,
#2
Needs some better production, but it is not bad really.


A clearer production will really make this jump off the crowd. Reminds me of Smashing Pumpkins for some reason.

I'd work on making the vocals a tad more conventional, right now there a little hard to hear and a little off the wall, I would take some more meat on them, but hey I'm not a vocalist so what do I know.

c4c?: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1151558
Quote by progbass
right Metallica is a given. Personally I like to pretend the bus exploded and killed them all in '86.

GUITAR PEDALS FOR SALE
#3
Quote by acdclandon
Needs some better production, but it is not bad really.


A clearer production will really make this jump off the crowd. Reminds me of Smashing Pumpkins for some reason.

I'd work on making the vocals a tad more conventional, right now there a little hard to hear and a little off the wall, I would take some more meat on them, but hey I'm not a vocalist so what do I know.

c4c?: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1151558


Well I do love old SP a awful lot so I will take that as a compliment :P and yeah I really am a bad producer thats been the problem with the last ones 2 x.x
#4
Dude i totally liked it. You've got a good voice, and the song was put together nicley. I would probably like to see a longer verse before the chorus (which kind of feels like a prechorus or build up of the verse which I was just waiting to bam explode, know what I mean?)

And yea ofcourse, you need better recording quality. Everything pretty much was clipping - but u know that already.

Oh and I liked the solo too.

C4C? I used garageband too.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1152060

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#5
^ thank you!! Yeah I had a second part 2 the verse but it didn't sound right to me so I took it out.
and I know my recording sucks hahaha. I can't afford equipment to make it sound better and this is as good as its gonna get pretty much lol.


O! I got a newer version up I dnt think its any better put I changed a few things so check it out now.
Last edited by rockfan7 at Jun 27, 2009,