#1
ok heres a sure to be hot subject. ok heres the rules . start with: What do you tell your child..... and finish it with the instance of your choice. the next person shal say what they would tell their child(refering to the above posters instance) as well as continue with the original format have fun and ill start.

What do you tell your child when they hold up a condom and ask "daddy/mommy whats thing for?"
Being a Bass player is pretty LOW i.m.o...
My Gear:
squier strat HSS
(coming soon) hand built superstrat style.
(coming soon) hand built mahogany spruce top acoustic.
Fender Mustang I 20w
Line 6 FLoor POD (standard)
#2
"Sexing your mom's friends"

What do you tell your kid when he finds your porn folder?
████████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
█████████████████████████
██████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
#3
Don't worry it really is just my tax returns.
Please excuse my godawful username. I was thirteen.
#4
Quote by Kensai
"Sexing your mom"

What do you tell your kid when he finds your porn folder?



I'll get you one when you're old enough. But only if you don't tell mom!


EDIT: What do you do when your teenager who you've told drugs are bad finds your weed.
Last edited by mamosa at Jun 27, 2009,
#5
Quote by Kensai
"Sexing your mom's friends"

What do you tell your kid when he finds your porn folder?

I'm a biology teacher son, it's my job.

What do you tell your kid when they hear your bed banging against the wall, decide to investigate, and there is "mayonnaise" on your partner's face?
An Augmented 4th or a Diminished 5th?


Quote by I.O.T.M
You, fine sir, have impeccable taste.


Ahhhh Yuck Fou.
#7
Quote by Kensai
"Sexing your mom's friends"

What do you tell your kid when he finds your porn folder?

thats my daddy fun time stuff now dont let mom see that its a surprise!

what do you tell your child when they point to a nearby person and asks"daddy whys that persons head shaped funny?"
Being a Bass player is pretty LOW i.m.o...
My Gear:
squier strat HSS
(coming soon) hand built superstrat style.
(coming soon) hand built mahogany spruce top acoustic.
Fender Mustang I 20w
Line 6 FLoor POD (standard)
#8
Quote by Mrfussytabs
thats my daddy fun time stuff now dont let mom see that its a surprise!

what do you tell your child when they point to a nearby person and asks"daddy whys that persons head shaped funny?"



That man has a funny head, because daddy put it in a vice, erm, hug. He is my good friend you see?

What do you tell your child when they ask you what "sodomy" is?
An Augmented 4th or a Diminished 5th?


Quote by I.O.T.M
You, fine sir, have impeccable taste.


Ahhhh Yuck Fou.
#9
Quote by Dawginator
I'm a biology teacher son, it's my job.

What do you tell your kid when they hear your bed banging against the wall, decide to investigate, and there is "mayonnaise" on your partner's face?

We were having a gymnastics contest and she lost so she got mayo in her face.

What do you tell your child when you see a bunch of porn sites in your browser history?
(BTW these are sites you haven't visited)
#10
That Pazazu is possessing them and it's their fault.

What do you tell your child when they ask you who that woman in your bedroom was yesterday?
Please excuse my godawful username. I was thirteen.
#11
thats what you call a *****

what do you tell your kid when he finds you jerking off
What are you dense?
Are you retarded or something?
Who the hell do you think I am?
I'm the goddamn Batman.

April 19th, 2011: The Night of the Boob

#12
Quote by Mrfussytabs
thats my daddy fun time stuff now dont let mom see that its a surprise!

what do you tell your child when they point to a nearby person and asks"daddy whys that persons head shaped funny?"


Because they touch themselves at night.

What do you tell your child when they say they wanna meet Santa?
#13
Quote by Dawginator
That man has a funny head, because daddy put it in a vice, erm, hug. He is my good friend you see?

What do you tell your child when they ask you what "sodomy" is?

nice one i didnt think id be able to say this so soon.

im torn between "son there are some weird people out there. it would be best if you googled it" and "ask your mother"

What do you tell your child when they ask why you keep hurting mom at night?
Being a Bass player is pretty LOW i.m.o...
My Gear:
squier strat HSS
(coming soon) hand built superstrat style.
(coming soon) hand built mahogany spruce top acoustic.
Fender Mustang I 20w
Line 6 FLoor POD (standard)
#14
Quote by blackflag49
Because they touch themselves at night.

What do you tell your child when they say they wanna meet Santa?


Santa died.........because of something you did.


What do you tell your child when he notices that you don't talk to him anymore.
Quote by imdeth
You're like internet Jesus!

This signature feels so empty now.
#15
Quote by RG5EX1
Santa died.........because of something you did.


What do you tell your child when he notices that you don't talk to him anymore.


i can tel you like to put people on the spot.
assuming hes a teen "because youre a pain in my ass"

What do you tell your child when they ask you for condom money?
Being a Bass player is pretty LOW i.m.o...
My Gear:
squier strat HSS
(coming soon) hand built superstrat style.
(coming soon) hand built mahogany spruce top acoustic.
Fender Mustang I 20w
Line 6 FLoor POD (standard)
#16
Kai, no glove, no love.

What do you tell your child when they ask you for liquor money?
An Augmented 4th or a Diminished 5th?


Quote by I.O.T.M
You, fine sir, have impeccable taste.


Ahhhh Yuck Fou.
#17
Quote by RampagingAcorn
thats what you call a *****

what do you tell your kid when he finds you jerking off


your mother won't stfu! besides, i want to stay happy
OR
your mother won't let me hot carl her!!

what do you tell your kid when he finds you ramming your wife against the wall?
Quote by diminishedtobme
I think the male ones have dicks, Im not sure though.

Quote by tgregory2010
ah screw you lol

#18
Quote by Dawginator
Kai, no glove, no love.

What do you tell your child when they ask you for liquor money?


You are 12, and what is this?!?!?!

What do you tell your child when they ask you if it is okay to be gay.
Quote by imdeth
You're like internet Jesus!

This signature feels so empty now.
#19
Quote by Dawginator
Kai, no glove, no love.

What do you tell your child when they ask you for liquor money?


Ha ha here you go son.

What to you tell your child when he complains about there being a little thing between his legs and he cant walk right.
Being a Bass player is pretty LOW i.m.o...
My Gear:
squier strat HSS
(coming soon) hand built superstrat style.
(coming soon) hand built mahogany spruce top acoustic.
Fender Mustang I 20w
Line 6 FLoor POD (standard)
#20
Quote by Mrfussytabs
i can tel you like to put people on the spot.
assuming hes a teen "because youre a pain in my ass"

What do you tell your child when they ask you for condom money?



Son, seeing as you're probably a small, here's the money.
#21
Quote by Mrfussytabs
Ha ha here you go son.

What to you tell your child when he complains about there being a little thing between his legs and he cant walk right.


I never knew you were asian!

No, I kid, I kid.

What do you tell your child if it grabbed a little girl's ass and said "What does this do?"

I write songs.
YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO THEM
Currently Requiring Crits:
none
Last edited by WyvernOmega at Jun 27, 2009,
#22
Quote by Dawginator
Kai, no glove, no love.

What do you tell your child when they ask you for liquor money?


Ooo get me some too
Quote by diminishedtobme
I think the male ones have dicks, Im not sure though.

Quote by tgregory2010
ah screw you lol

#23
Quote by WyvernOmega
I never knew you were asian!

No, I kid, I kid.

What do you tell you child if I grabbed a little girl's ass and said "What does this do?"


i'd say that you're a child molestor
Quote by diminishedtobme
I think the male ones have dicks, Im not sure though.

Quote by tgregory2010
ah screw you lol

#24
Quote by Mrfussytabs
Ha ha here you go son.

What to you tell your child when he complains about there being a little thing between his legs and he cant walk right.


Try turning left, son.

What do you tell your son when he asks for a good porn site?
My setup:

Fender Telecaster Blacktop
Epiphone Les Paul Negative
VOX Valvetronix VT-30
Fulltone OCD
Boss FZ-5
#25
Quote by Intricacy13
i'd say that you're a child molestor


I meant your, and it.

I write songs.
YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO THEM
Currently Requiring Crits:
none
#26
Quote by LankeyDwarf
Try turning left, son.

What do you tell your son when he asks for a good porn site?


Point them towards 4chan

What do you tell your son when he asks for a handjob?
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#27
Quote by neopowell
Point them towards 4chan

What do you tell your son when he asks for a handjob?


SON. I AM DISSAPOINT.

I write songs.
YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO THEM
Currently Requiring Crits:
none
#28
Quote by WyvernOmega
SON. I AM DISSAPOINT.


I can't believe no-one said that before you!
Quote by ChadLikesGuitar
even now, an 8 year old could go download gorilla rape porn and jack off to it.
#29
Quote by neopowell
Point them towards 4chan

What do you tell your son when he asks for a handjob?



Ask your mother!

What do you tell your child when he tells you that he sucked a guys d!ck?
#30
Quote by thedefrockednun
Ask your mother!

What do you tell your child when he tells you that he sucked a guys d!ck?


Did you at least get your crack?

What do you tell your children when he ask how girl get pregnant
#31
Quote by The Shroom420
Did you at least get your crack?

What do you tell your children when he ask how girl get pregnant


you just stick it in and pee.
That's assuming this is at 12 or below
(: Happily E-Married to Nizzi <3 (:
Quote by Myfirstpubes
Then you get your bathroom door kicked in by some dude in a leather thong and a cape saying, "THIS IS SPARTA!"

Quote by shanethestoner
hard work. and inspiration... or marijuana

My MySpace
#32
Quote by lefthandman9876
there herbs, you like them in your pasta.

+1 i put it in my pasta
Quote by ultimatedaver
We're just trying to help man, cause it doesn't seem like you can get any pizza.
#33
Quote by Mrfussytabs
Ha ha here you go son.

What to you tell your child when he complains about there being a little thing between his legs and he cant walk right.


tell him that god messed up and that he was supposed to have a vagango.

What do you tell your child when he/she walks into a room where you're having sex?
<--- Craig: Guy With Best Username Ever
Quote by Primus2112
\m/[-_-]\m/

lulz, best name ever.

Quote by herby190
TS, your username is really difficult to type, so I'm just going to refer to you as Craig from now on. Okay? Okay.
#34
[quote="'\m/[-_-"]\m/']
What do you tell your child when he/she walks into a room where you're having sex?


"I was punishing mommy for touching the thermostat by wrestling her! The screams are of joy because with each spanking that occurs, there is one less to be done to her!"


What do you say to your kid if they catch you cheating on your spouse?
Heroes Never Live - Legends Never Die
#35
Quote by Zachadelic
"I was punishing mommy for touching the thermostat by wrestling her! The screams are of joy because with each spanking that occurs, there is one less to be done to her!"


What do you say to your kid if they catch you cheating on your spouse?


Rules were made to be broken.

What do you say to your kid if he finds out you post on the Pit?
#36
Quote by sureshred
Rules were made to be broken.

What do you say to your kid if he finds out you post on the Pit?


It was for scientific research.

What do you say to your kid when he finds out he was adopted?
#37
Quote by Taxi_06
It was for scientific research.

What do you say to your kid when he finds out he was adopted?


You're not adopted, mommy was just a slut.

What do you say when your kid tells you uncle freddy touched him?
#38
Quote by Taxi_06
It was for scientific research.

What do you say to your kid when he finds out he was adopted?

Your real parents probably would have been the kind that beat their kids so be quiet?

What do you tell your child when he asks what marijuana is?