#1
I challenged myself to write a danceable song. The drumbeat is taken off of my keyboard. The rest of the instruments are simply guitar and bass and I do the singing as well. I would've liked to have used my keyboard to add some more flair...but I have lost my powerchord. Anyway, I know the beat is danceable...but I just want to know if I've created a quality piece to go overtop of it.

The song is titled "Zero Sum" and can be found here
http://profile.ultimate-guitar.com/Spay/

And as always, C4C
The Pit. The Movie.
Last edited by Spay at Jun 30, 2009,
#3
Yes...the lyrics are weak...if they even deserve the title of being lyrics. Pitiful, I know. But I just remember a lot of dance music just being a single slogan shot over and over again. It was 4 in the morning, so I thought "Hell, why not?"
The Pit. The Movie.
#4
Cool song. Definitley danceable dude.

The strings at 2:30 were very appropriate, although on the second 4 bars of 'Right here Right now' they should have come back in.

Ooh that bass is awesome!

I like Propaganda too. Very awsome that one.
Member of the 7-String + ERG Legion.
#5
nice song, very dance indeed, but a heavy dance :p

i loved the notes played at 1.33.
like something out of a horror game ^^

the voice was nice 2 , except that at some points the delay was clearly off beat.

other than that , great job!!
#7
It's very groovy. I've always loved the sound of an electric guitar over a dance beat. I've always thought it had a cool sound. The echoes are a little off beat, maybe you tried it, but its nothing real big, i think it's when you were saying something like "Right here right now". But yeah man, keep up this work, I really enjoyed listening to it.
#8
That was awesome! Very groovy, very dance-able too. Love your tone, it fits the atmosphere of the song perfectly.
You said it yourself, the lyrics are very weak (Maybe the only flaw in your song) but that's easily changed. I don't know if it has been said, but the drum pattern is a bit too repetitive, try to add some fills and such, or just create sections like verse, chorus, bridge, etc.

Anyways, that was very groovy, I loved it! 8.5/10

Cheers for the crit!
#10
This is very enjoyable, love the beat and all that.

You can definitely dance to this, success.

I would take less edge on the vocals, just a little cleaner.

I like the atmosphere of the song a lot though.

You have a little clipping in some areas but the production was pretty good.

I like the middle part where you take out the rhythm guitars, and have that lead part, bass, and the beat going.

C4C?: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=20547134#post20547134
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#11
Good song this is I'd say. Nice riffing all the way through with some cool lead parts as well. However, I reckon the drum beat could be a bit louder to make it more of a 'dance' track - at the moment I'd say it's a metal song with a dance beat...unless that's what you're going for? Also the vocals could be a bit cleaner for a 'dance' track, and they would sound more electronica-ish if they had auto-tune on them. Oh and also, the bass break near the end was really awesome and changed things up nicely.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1154570

Edit: You already crit mine! Thanks - much appreciated.
Last edited by dethofmoo at Jul 1, 2009,
#12
sweet track man. i would agree with deathofmoo that the drums should be just a wee louder. i think the vocals should be a lot cleaner. the voice sounds harsh for dance, and the quality sounds a lot different than the rest of the song. maybe clean up static noise on it. also, i think you should get a timed echo, or time the echo from the vocals up to the beat. when it trails off on a different beat it throws things off. otherwise, track sounds sweet. the riffs are awesome. great dance track.