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#1
Right, that title will have hooked in a couple of angsty pit monkeys, so down to buisness.

Basically, I've just been informed that I screwed a girl on friday night/saturday morning, but I have no memory of the entire night. The last memory I have is rocking up to the party at about midnight and up to opening my 5th beer, then it's just like a black hole.

At some point in the night, I know I kissed this same girl thanks to the joys of Facebook, but I've just been told by probably the most truthful person in the world that I also went on to shag her. I'm still in denial, but there is alot of evidence to say I did.

Alot of people saw me walk back with her from the woods with her holding her tights in one had and an empty bottle of vodka in the other. Also, the next day, my **** started hurting, so I had a look and what should I find, but BITE MARKS! WTF??!!

So, my question to you pit is this: If I can't remember losing my virginity, did I ever lose it? A real tree-falling-alone-in-the-woods style question for you good people.
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#3
Yes, you are a virgin AND a troll.
funkyducky


Icing happen when de puck come down, BANG, you know,
before de oder guys, nobody dere, you know.
My arm go comme ça, den de game stop den start up.

Quote by daytripper75
Get To Da Choppa!
#5
You were RAPED.


I would go to the police. Don't stand for this!
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.


-Jimi Hendrix-

Quote by CodySG
You know you're in the drug thread when you see pictures of squash and "tuna nigga!" when you click the page.
#8
A dog chewed your knob, nothing more.

^He could just be an embarrassing lightweight.
#11
Quote by slashnmash
Was she fit?

Is so, yes.

If not, denial is your friend.


Thats the thing, she's not too bad in all honesty, out of my league without the help of my trusty friend alcohol, but she has a stupidly tough boyfriend. Seriously, I he fought me it would be over so quickly that people wouldn't even have time to laugh.

I have a feeling that denial is my friend here.
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#13
Quote by CoreysMonster
you blacked out after 5 beers?

I smell a troll


Thats where I remember the evening up until. I've been informed that I drank waaaaaay more, and that probably helped towards my dutch courage.

No trolling here my friend.
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#14
You are a stupid non-virgin who managed to probably have the best sex of your life in the woods without even being aware of what was happening.
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#15
D-U-F-R-A-I-S


Quote by darkstar2466
WRONG.

The only reason it exists is because drugs get people fucked up, and people love getting fucked up.

#16
Quote by Ulalume
You are a stupid non-virgin who managed to probably have the best sex of your life in the woods without even being aware of what was happening.


Thats what I was afraid of lol.
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#17
You're 16 years old.......................................

I'm leaning on troll.
C4C
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#18
If you have five beers before you black out I think this counts as statutory. Cause you have to be a little girl. But you're not a virgin. Hope it was special.

Edit: Oh, I just read the bit about the empty bottle of vodka. Nevermind.


Pansy.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#20
Quote by BlisteringDDj
You're 16 years old.......................................

I'm leaning on troll.


16 is legal here my man.
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#21
Quote by slashnmash
Was she fit?

Is so, yes.

If not, denial is your friend.

you just summed my 6th form years in 12 words
#22
Those aren't bite marks, they're chlamydia scabs. So, to answer your question, you are not a virgin.
#23
youre friend who claimed you shagged the girl sucked your **** in the woods
#24
You know what I think would be awesome? If you got herpes as a constant reminder of something you don't remember.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#25
Quote by dweb23
youre friend who claimed you shagged the girl sucked your **** in the woods


She's a devout muslim.

I doubt it :P
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#26
I find the bite marks hard to believe I think the question here is whether you wore a rubber during all of this >.>
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
#27
Sounds like a good night to me.

Edit: In all fairness I would have been pretty drunk after 5 beers when I was 16, but maybe not to the point where I can't remember anything.
#28
Quote by Skullshredda
I find the bite marks hard to believe I think the question here is whether you wore a rubber during all of this >.>

I dunno. Some sixteen year olds really have no idea what they are doing. When I was in highschool, this girl gave me a hand job once.. I had to fake an orgasm to get her to stop. It hurt. When I was questioned about why nothing came out, I had to make up an elaborate dissertation on how and why men don't always cum.

Point in case: TS is a sixteen year old. He has no idea how to handle his liquor. Or women, apparently. If he has no idea what he's doing, why should the girl?
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#29
Quote by adyhendrixc
Sounds like a good night to me.


Judging by the mammoth hangover in the morning, yes, yes it was
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#30
Quote by :.RaZoRbAcK.:
Judging by the mammoth hangover in the morning, yes, yes it was

Get back to us in a week when you have mammoth open sores on your crotch. And in nine months when you have a mammoth baby who is also covered in sores.

..Just saying.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#32
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Get back to us in a week when you have mammoth open sores on your crotch. And in nine months when you have a mammoth baby who is also covered in sores.

..Just saying.


Graphic...
#33
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Get back to us in a week when you have mammoth open sores on your crotch. And in nine months when you have a mammoth baby who is also covered in sores.

..Just saying.


This would almost be siggable if it wasn't such a frighteningly accurate description of what is probably to come...
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#34
wen i ask they say that they fall into the habit smhw ........but nyways i think there is a connection smwhere. Now i being a teetollar will not give into this habit nyhw

FOR JUST £2 A WEEK, YOU CAN PREVENT THIS.
#36
Quote by adyhendrixc
Graphic...

I've said more graphic things than that. At least I didn't bring up the pus dripping down his leg, into his socks, which he then has to slosh around in all day long.

Better start carrying socks in your backpack, TS.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#37
Quote by Jack Off Jill
I've said more graphic things than that. At least I didn't bring up the pus dripping down his leg, into his socks, which he then has to slosh around in all day long.

Better start carrying socks in your backpack, TS.


I can't help but feel this is coming from personal experience.

Either that, or you watch some straaaange stuff...
Quote by deanodon
you know your a man when youve asked your gran for nude pics

Quote by .smudged.
Sex is overrated, try World of Warcraft.


"One does not simply sweep A major 7!"
#38
Quote by Jack Off Jill
I've said more graphic things than that. At least I didn't bring up the pus dripping down his leg, into his socks, which he then has to slosh around in all day long.

Better start carrying socks in your backpack, TS.



...


Graphic...
#39
Quote by :.RaZoRbAcK.:
The last memory I have is rocking up to the party at about midnight and up to opening my 5th beer, then it's just like a black hole.

O_o
#40
Quote by :.RaZoRbAcK.:
I can't help but feel this is coming from personal experience.

Either that, or you watch some straaaange stuff...

Almost. This girl I slept with wound up getting herpes. Fortunately for me, she got them from the guy after me cause I got tested for them and was perfectly fine. Turns out, she was quite a slut.

And you know what? You think after a scare like that, you'd be a little more careful with who you sleep with, you know? But you really aren't. Or maybe that's just me.

I do watch some pretty awesome stuff, though. Like this:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_c43Sa4dztk&feature=related
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
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