Saf1
Basshead
Join date: Jun 2007
386 IQ
#2
I like the half time feel at bar 13, very effective. I also LOVE that riff in bar 24! The rhythm is variable enough to keep interest while not being too insane to detract from the song, so kudos there too. And the dynamic range is great!

But I don't think hand claps are appropriate in this metal song (bar 20), and I think some sections should not necessarily be repeated as it sometimes gives it a feel of predictability.

When your guitars do their tremolo bar stuff I reckon they should be playing atleast two notes as it sounds a bit thin otherwise. I would end the song on a massive metal chord, personally.

With improvements this could be really cool!
cptazad
Jeff Loomis is God
Join date: Jan 2006
1,704 IQ
#3
Don't know what to make of this.

bar 16-18 = random notes? Seems like it to me anyways, as if no thought were put into writing that section.

Riff at bar 19 is good though

I can't give this song a score, like I said, don't know what to make of this one. What was up w/ the clapping sound for drums lol, was not expecting that.

crit one of mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1154297
"Our revenge so everlasting sweet,
Enslave your Children, Behead the weak,
Kill every last Man, Woman and Machine
The cleansing has begun.
Your meek defense is foolish,
we come from the stars a trillion strong."
kylendm
Baronboi
Join date: Aug 2006
8,191 IQ
#4
Yeah you really need to work on your drums.. There is just no rhythm...that's all i can say.
Guitars:
Ibanez UV777P
Ibanez RGD2127FX
Ibanez RG3120TW
Ibanez RGD7421
Ibanez SA160
Amps:
Baron Custom Amps K88
Randall RM100
Madison Divinity II
Cabs:
Mesa 4x12
Bogner 4x12
H&K 4x12